FIL may pass away, so sad for hubby but concerned for future

[hulahoop09]

Hiya

My fil is very ill in hospital atm and they have said he may pull through but to prepare for the worst. Hubby thinks he is gonna die. I feel so sorry for hubby as he is putting blame on himself etc. He is an only child also so not much support. Now I am hoping he pulls through this at the same time I am a stresshead and am worrying about if the worst happened it is in our hands to pay for his funeral. I believe basic funeral would cost about 2.5k? We would struggle to afford 1k! And as we dont claim benefit we would have to fund it and I just dont know how. We had planned to start ttc next summer and all that would have to be put on hold for a good few years. As it is we could only afford approx 50pm which I am sure no funeral director would accept! I know I shouldnt be thinking like this but I think at some point someone has to.

I am feeling upset right now and hoping he pulls through but also full of dread for our future of he doesnt.

Xx

 

[Quackquack99]

i am so sorry your fil is ill. could you phone around different funeral directors to see how much it cost on average.

 

[hulahoop09]

I feel a bit horrid calling and asking but from some research online it seems it could cost around the 2.5k mark maybe a little more maybe a little less. Xx

 

[smokey]

Sorry your having to go through this.
There is a funeral payment help you can get from the government and alot of directers do take monthly instalment payments.

You should talk to tattiesmum she is a funeral director and can give you some advice about how to go about getting the grant and maybe how to go about a cheap but respectfull funeral.

Of course this all is worse case scenario and he may pull through, hoping he does for your husbands sake.

 

[hulahoop09]

Thank you. I started a thread earlier this year that she commented on. We cant get the grant as we are only on child benefit. She mentioned letting the council arrange a service for him whereby it os all out of our hands but we had discussed these things before and I dont think hubby would let that happen. Its hard as we have 5 parents between us and only 1 of them may have a plan so the others it is in our hands unfortunately. I hope he does pull through for hubbys sake also

Xx

 

[smokey]

I think if you get child tax credits you can get the funeral grant.

 

[hulahoop09]

We had our child tax credits taken off us in april as we 'earn too much' unfortunately

Xx

 

[smokey]

We had our child tax credits taken off us in april as we 'earn too much' unfortunately

Xx

Typical, as with alot of things it doesnt pay to work

 

[hulahoop09]

I know it sucks, cant afford to not work but also struggle when I do and have to rely on my dad to watch lo as we cant afford childcare! And you only get help with funeral of on benefit.

Fil has no assets and is in a lot of debt so no way we can even pull anything from that!

Xx

 

[smokey]

Does your fil have a wife or partner, it would probably be alot easier for a partner to get a berievment payment of £2000 (if he paid ni contrabutions) then for a offspring to get a grant

 

[hulahoop09]

He has a girlfriend who has been with for over 8 years. Neither of them work (both used to but not sure of he has paid enough ni contributionsb. Also I didnt think she could claim for the funeral as she isnt legally his partner and he has an offspring who works and earns a wage so I thought would fall to him to pay

Xx

 

[Mummy2B21]

Im sorry your FIL is ill hun, you could try pming Tattiesmum she is a funerall director and could give you some advice, x

 

[xcharx]

Tattiesmum is a funeral director so she can help. Sorry to hear about your FIL

Cx

 

[hulahoop09]

Thanks for the replies. Seems he may be ok thank god. Hubby seems a lot happier. he does need to change his lifestyle though! I just feel a bit on edge now as it could happen to anyone of our parents and we arent in a situation to pay for a funeral but if we tried to save something it could mean putting our family on hold for quite a while which means we may never have another lo if we do this!

xx

 

[Eternal]

Glad he has pulled through, I think now would be a good time to discuss with them how they should think about payment funerals.

 

[hulahoop09]

Fil isnt in a position to save for one and he is sort of person to just say throw me somewhere. He doesnt work. Also my mum works my dad doesnt and they struggle and arent in position to save. Its so difficult cause I dont wanna live my life now worrying about what we would do if one of them passed. I think my parents would be happy for council burial but i dont think hubby is keen on that for his dad.

 

[babyerin]

Im sure I have heard if you are up to date with your water bill payments they have a fund to help with funerals. Ill look it up when I get on a computer x