finally had enough..

[KaeRit21]

hey girls...didnt know where else to post this, guess im just in need of some reassurance or maybe a few words of advice...

FOB was supposed to be here LAST FRIDAY with money hed "promised" to me to help me pay off my pram. friday night came and went, and nothing. i didnt text him (i hadnt been holding my breath for it anyway), and i didnt bother to phone him. the weekend passed by, still no txt or phone call from him, and the week went the same way.
til THURSDAY. i gets a phone call to say "his wages hadnt been paid, and still werent right"

ok. 1. hes a compulsive liar. and 2. what company doesnt fix ur wages for a WEEK?

this wasnt what had annoyed me. he hadnt bothered to text or phone me for a week to tell me this and hadnt bothered to text and find out if everything was alright with, ahem, "HIS" baby.
i not-so-polietly told him to forget it, by this point i was pissed off he was STILL lying to me and id paid my pram myself (slight proudness from me).
he then had the cheek to tell me i was out of order for telling him i didnt want one single thing off him as hes been "promising" the same things since march and i hadnt seen any evidence of it and its now OCTOBER..
i told him that it was pointless having anything is his house (which he says he has..its ANOTHER lie) because i wasnt just going to hand over my newborn baby for overnights at his. he ended the phone (so maturely) by shouting "Thats Fu**ing Bollocks!!" at me and hanging up.

i left it til today to phone him and ask if i could come and pick up things id left in his house. he answered the phone with a "whit?". i went up to his, he handed me a bag of my things, (wearing a BRAND NEW jacket n jeans btw!!!) looked at me and went "is that it then?"

i held back my tears and replied yea. he simply turned and walked away.

him thats soooo interested in "HIS" baby, he didnt even ask me face to face how i was or how things were with baby.

so i have decided that that is it. im done. officially. have deleted him from every where i can find him on/in/around.

i actually hve never had so much contempt for one human being as i have him. he had the cheek to tell me i was out of order, when hes wanting to sit back, play the doting dad and contribute to NOTHING.

am i wrong for standing up to him? wrong for wanting to keep my baby from his unreliable, selfish, lying ways?.

sorry for the long post girls,

xxx

 

[lou_w34]

I dont think you are wrong

He's had many many chances from you, and it seems like youve been very reasonable.

If he was that interested in his baby, he would ask you how they are doing and he would contribute something. Even if his wages were messed around with, he could have told you there and then, instead of making you wait a week.

If he's really interested, he will try and contact you, dont contact him anymore. Make him work for it, then you'll see how bothered he really is

 

[21Rach]

he sounds like a f***ing loser, i think im gonna be joining this forum outta choice soon too! x

 

[expecting09]

Good for you hun, he doesn't deserve any contact with baby. He's lied more than once saying he will be buying things, coming round with money etc and not done anything!

If he really did want to be part of babys life he will contact you. You just need to worry about you and LO

 

[KaeRit21]

thanks girls...he is a loser...also found out hes spent the rest of the weekend wasted in the pub. just the example im looking to set for my baby.


pffft!

xxx

 

[DizzyMoo]

1st of i wanna give you a bloody big hug hun , Its not easy going through this & i know it full well... twice!! (sigh)
Once you make that decision though & the days start to pass you will realise you are strong & you do not NEED him around or his money at all, Yes of course it helps but if it isn't a reliable source or coming from a source you can trust then it isn't worth the hassle imo. It causes more stress to you & in turn this can affect your children without you realising.
It takes guts & a lot of being pissed about before you can finally say " fuck him " & you got there hun, Give it a week & you will feel so much better for it, Proud & stronger by the day.

He is not worth your time, & so far isn't worth your babies time either.

Mega hugs hun,

 

[cheeselover]

I think you sound amazing, strong and courageous...hold your head up and keep doing what you are doing, you do not need this loser in your life. One day your little boy/girl will realise just how amazing you are. XXX

 

[KaeRit21]

you ladies alomst made me cry with ur encouragement...ive had a pretty crap weekend, wondering how im going to do this on my own and having a cry...but you know what? i CAN do it. and i WILL do it. because my littl boy or girl needs me, and i'm going to be the best mummy i can be

thank you girls , your words mean a lot

xxx

 

[lou_w34]

Your right! You CAN do this... with or without him

 

[DizzyMoo]

You will hun , you will be fine & have bad days course but just you wait til you get a proper good day hun it will blow you away with something so simple as a smile, a gurgle or even a fart lol All the bad days or off moments you may of had will be miles away & you will be on

We're here hun don't forget & so am i, pm or msn me xx

 

[Perdita]

what a prat! (though my work still owes me a full 12 hour shifts pay from 6 MONTHS ago so the screwed up wages thing I can relate to - was once paid £14.50 instead of £1450!!)
Your dong great on your own and you know he's no use to you - you're on the right path! If he crawls back later you get to set the terms and he can like it or lump it. I'm tired of hearing about how men have it hard after a split - big f**king deal - try being pregnant after a split and having to go cap in hand to the social to make sure you can keep a roof over your baby's head and food in their bellies!!

 

[KaeRit21]

something you said there perdita reminds me of something he said to me too.

"is it my fault i was out getting wrecked? no! cant blame me taking us breaking up hard!"

oh how this make me laugh now but i was so angry at the time.

i hate men. no use bunch of wankers. sorry bout language.

love how with no wages (AHEM) he cant give me money for baby but he can afford to go down his local and get ratarsed. but, thats not his fault. nooooo. never is.

and breath 1,2,3....out 2,3...lol


xxxx

 

[sleepinbeauty]

*rolls eyes* men.

 

[KaeRit21]

i was at the midwife today...but havent heard ANYTHING from fob...not even a "hows baby"...i dont wanna be accused of pushing him ou, but im not going to force him to be interested....

but should i send a text or something to let him know? most of me thinks why the hell should i when hes not bothering to ask for himself...oh god i duno...

help?

xxx