Don't apologise wish26mama - we all have outbursts like that. I do - at least once a day!!!
My nightmare year was last year - almost everyone was announcing their news every other month and I think I probably cried (privately) about every single one. But I have enjoyed being around babies as they have been born and there's also a part of me that feels a teensy bit happy that I am still able to do all the things I want to do when my friends are tied at home - it's only a glimmer of a silver lining, but one I try to cling to! Our time will come, I promise.
I know what you mean about not testing - I'm now 14dpo and the latest I will be due on is tomorrow, but I'm too terrified of another
. I'm more of a POAS-phobe rather than a POAS-addict! I still have sore nips / BBs, massive headache, very tired and I thought at first I was imagining it, but I have had a couple of nauseous episodes for the past 2-3 days. Today was particularly bad for about an hour this morning and this PM and I'm pretty sure its nothing I could be imagining. Also weepy too - crying at the news, etc!
BUT, I've been doing this all for too long to allow myself to get too excited. I have had AF pains a bit in my back especially - although the hopeful part of me thinks if I do have endo as they suspect then perhaps I would expect to have that kind of pain anyway as the lining would still be growing outside my womb, causing discomfort? I wouldn't say I have had AF cramps yet and don't feel like I am about to come on (at the moment!) But it could all change in a moment if
shows up....
Hang on in there, not long to go and I am sending you bundles of
for the next couple of days until you are brave enough to test. And in the meantime, feel free to outburst all you like - that's what we are here for!
xxxx