For those who have had success with CC..

[Firefox]

1) Did you find that the 'checks' made your baby cry harder/worse for longer?
2) What is the longest that you have/ would leave your baby to cry (knowing (as best that you can) that there is not anything wrong with them)
3) What do you do during the 'checks'? & what do you do if your baby doesn't stop crying during your time in the room?

We are currently weaning our DS (6 months) off his dummy. He only used it for sleeping (naps and at night) and I have been gradually reducing using it for both naps and at night before going cold turkey on the dummy trying CC.

We started using CC on Friday and it took him 20mins to go to sleep the first night and last night it was 10mins (with no crying!!).

The problem we have is with the night wakenings, usually around 3-4am. I used to just give my DS the dummy at this point and he would go straight back to sleep until 6am-ish! Since withdrawing the dummy we have tried CC to get him back to sleep. Both nights it has taken nearly 2 hours for him to go back to sleep . I think going in to check on him might be pro longing the crying? Last night I somehow managed to leave him for 15mins (rather than the 5/10mins) and he settled himself to sleep. Im sure he isnt hungry as isnt that bothered about his first morning bottle. His naps are usually 30mins 2hrs after waking, 1-2hrs around 3hours later then a 15-20min one later in the afternoon.

I'd appreciate anyones experiences/ tips thanks

 

[bookworm0901]

1.) the first night, I felt so guilty that I did 3 min checks. In a thread I started, some ladies told me that 3 mins was way too short and probably disturbing him from a real chance at falling asleep. I changed it to increasing 5 min intervals- 5, 10, 15 and starting back at 5 if he fell asleep and woke up again later.
2.) he never needed longer than 20 mins, and I'm not sure if I would leave him longer, but only because I know him and now that CC has worked for us, if he is crying for longer than that there is something really wrong.
3.)my checks are short and I usually go in and talk to him cheerfully, I tell him I love him and lay him back down (if he's crying then he will stand up), this usually makes him mad because he thinks he's getting picked up for a second. Then I usually rub his hair for a second and sing him our bedtime song. I leave after only just a minute or two, no matter how he reacts. He needs to realize that you are there and he hasn't been abandoned, but he needs to get to sleep on his own.

 

[Firefox]

Thank you very much for your reply it has helped me out loads. Would it take more than a couple of 15min intervals in the beginning for him to go to sleep?

 

[Brittles]

what is cc?

 

[fieryphoenix]

what is cc?

Controlled crying

 

[Brittles]

oh is that like CIO?

 

[fieryphoenix]

Yeah. Controlled crying you go in and comfort baby every 5-10-15 minutes until they fall asleep, CIO is cry it out and you just let them cry themselves to sleep and don't go it, period.

 

[Brittles]

Yeah. Controlled crying you go in and comfort baby every 5-10-15 minutes until they fall asleep, CIO is cry it out and you just let them cry themselves to sleep and don't go it, period.

oh really? every CIO thing Ive read is go in and comfort them

 

[mrsbeano]

Depending on the cry (I can tell if something is really wrong) I give Quinn 15 mins response time for night wakings nowadays. He will go back over without me 9 out of 10 times.

Not so much at the moment but in the last couple of months, we would have this cry out for 5-10 mins at 5ish every now and again. He seems to be growing out of it.

 

[bookworm0901]

Thank you very much for your reply it has helped me out loads. Would it take more than a couple of 15min intervals in the beginning for him to go to sleep?

On the first night (when I was doing 3 min checks), he cried for an hour before falling asleep and then an hour around 3 am. The rest of the night he would wake up, start to cry, but fall asleep before I could even get there. He did this a thousand times, so at first I was still being woken up all night.

Ever since that first night, which I think I messed up with 3 min checks, it's never taken more than 10 mins- 2 checks- to fall back to sleep. We've been doing it close to a month and if he wakes up and wont sleep, I always do 1 check because he will occasionally pee through his diaper. So I feel to make sure he's dry and leave, and I don't go back. He's always back to sleep fast.

One thing that changed for us when I started CC was an earlier wake up time. Now that he's sleeping well at night he doesn't need to sleep in as much and it used to be a 7:30-8 PM wake up and now it's 6:30 usually.

 

[Firefox]

Depending on the cry (I can tell if something is really wrong) I give Quinn 15 mins response time for night wakings nowadays. He will go back over without me 9 out of 10 times.

Not so much at the moment but in the last couple of months, we would have this cry out for 5-10 mins at 5ish every now and again. He seems to be growing out of it.

Thanks yeah I know what you mean about depending on the cry, the last two nights my DS has only started crying after being awake a while and was fine when I initially picked him up to check him & stopped crying. I have been picking him up on some of the occasions when I have been into the room (when he is proper screaming) and I think that's probably where im going wrong and possibly pro-longing things. It seems with CC you really are letting them CIO but re-assuring them at set intervals that you are still there? Ive got a video monitor so can see exactly what hes doing & he only calms down when hes picked up. Suppose its a bit trial and error like everything cos they are all so different. Its just painful when he gets himself so worked up & sometimes seems too worked up to put them back to sleep (which is what I thought last night and then he randomly slowed down the crying and dropped off to sleep).

With your LO cry out at 5ish, does he get really worked up then or is it more of a tired cry still?

 

[lollipop92]

Could he be a little bit thirsty (for water not milk) when he wakes through the night? My little girl always goes straight back to sleep after a drink of water xx

 

[Firefox]

Thank you very much for your reply it has helped me out loads. Would it take more than a couple of 15min intervals in the beginning for him to go to sleep?

On the first night (when I was doing 3 min checks), he cried for an hour before falling asleep and then an hour around 3 am. The rest of the night he would wake up, start to cry, but fall asleep before I could even get there. He did this a thousand times, so at first I was still being woken up all night.

Ever since that first night, which I think I messed up with 3 min checks, it's never taken more than 10 mins- 2 checks- to fall back to sleep. We've been doing it close to a month and if he wakes up and wont sleep, I always do 1 check because he will occasionally pee through his diaper. So I feel to make sure he's dry and leave, and I don't go back. He's always back to sleep fast.

One thing that changed for us when I started CC was an earlier wake up time. Now that he's sleeping well at night he doesn't need to sleep in as much and it used to be a 7:30-8 PM wake up and now it's 6:30 usually.

Wow thats brill that even on the 2nd night it was 2 checks! With the night ones then when you check for wetness (I'm doing the same & for wind) has it always been within the 10mins that hes gone back to sleep?

What time does your lo go to bed? Mine is asleep at 6:45/7 so think its reasonable to hope for a 6am wake up? I'd take 5:30 at the mo & no crying

I'm hoping for a more successful night tonight and like I said in the previous post from what you have said I think I've been going really wrong with picking him up to actually stop him from crying (therefore just re-setting all the crying?). Sorry I didn't have much time to write back earlier but wanted you to know that I'd read your reply.

 

[Firefox]

Could he be a little bit thirsty (for water not milk) when he wakes through the night? My little girl always goes straight back to sleep after a drink of water xx

Thanks I hadn't thought of that, will def give it a try if keep having horrendous nights, although I'm trying to get away from any kind of 'prop' that gets him back to sleep. I'd love for him to be able to do it for himself & he does other times throughout the night cos Ive seen him stir loads on the monitor. I think he might just want to start the day freakishly early...no fun!

 

[mrsbeano]

Depending on the cry (I can tell if something is really wrong) I give Quinn 15 mins response time for night wakings nowadays. He will go back over without me 9 out of 10 times.

Not so much at the moment but in the last couple of months, we would have this cry out for 5-10 mins at 5ish every now and again. He seems to be growing out of it.

Thanks yeah I know what you mean about depending on the cry, the last two nights my DS has only started crying after being awake a while and was fine when I initially picked him up to check him & stopped crying. I have been picking him up on some of the occasions when I have been into the room (when he is proper screaming) and I think that's probably where im going wrong and possibly pro-longing things. It seems with CC you really are letting them CIO but re-assuring them at set intervals that you are still there? Ive got a video monitor so can see exactly what hes doing & he only calms down when hes picked up. Suppose its a bit trial and error like everything cos they are all so different. Its just painful when he gets himself so worked up & sometimes seems too worked up to put them back to sleep (which is what I thought last night and then he randomly slowed down the crying and dropped off to sleep).

With your LO cry out at 5ish, does he get really worked up then or is it more of a tired cry still?

I can't especially help with CC as I haven't done it myself but I think you're reassuring both of you tbh.

When he wakes he will often scream for a couple of minutes but then very quickly it goes into a couple of shouts and calms down. If he needs me for something its a lot more constant and he doesn't calm down.

He sounds like he's taking to it well though and that he's ready. Hope you get some good rest soon x

 

[lollipop92]

Haha, that's just what I thought, but I don't let her drink herself back to sleep with her bottle or anything, just a quick sip to wet her mouth and then say night night and go back out. I suppose even adults sometimes wake up with a dry mouth xx

 

[bookworm0901]

Yeah after that first night, it's always been really fast. Usually quicker than 10 minutes, 10 minutes is the longest. I have to reassure myself on the rare occasion when he goes longer than 10 minutes because I worry that there might be something wrong, but that's how I messed him up.

Let me explain: The first time I ever attempted CC, he was only six months old. It worked much more quickly when he was younger, because he couldn't crawl around his crib. It went really well, and he was settling down so quickly. Then, on the third day, he started screaming and crying again. I had convinced myself that he needed to be picked up because he had already stopped crying on day 1 & 2, so when he started crying again I thought maybe something was actually wrong. I started getting him out of his crib again, and messed us all up. We ended up back where we started And I didn't try again for three more months. Looking back, I now know it was just a small relapse and I should have just continued CC.

He usually goes to bed between 730 and eight. And gets up at 6:30. I am going to start putting him to bed earlier, it just seems like for the past few days when I've been meaning to we've had a lot going on.

I definitely For sure think that the problem is picking him up. He wants to be picked up and he's crying and waiting for you until you come do it. You are right that cc is really CIO with short checks to reassure the baby that you are still there. It's hard, but I think once they realize they won't be picked up or rocked they just go to sleep.

 

[Firefox]

Yeah after that first night, it's always been really fast. Usually quicker than 10 minutes, 10 minutes is the longest. I have to reassure myself on the rare occasion when he goes longer than 10 minutes because I worry that there might be something wrong, but that's how I messed him up.

Let me explain: The first time I ever attempted CC, he was only six months old. It worked much more quickly when he was younger, because he couldn't crawl around his crib. It went really well, and he was settling down so quickly. Then, on the third day, he started screaming and crying again. I had convinced myself that he needed to be picked up because he had already stopped crying on day 1 & 2, so when he started crying again I thought maybe something was actually wrong. I started getting him out of his crib again, and messed us all up. We ended up back where we started And I didn't try again for three more months. Looking back, I now know it was just a small relapse and I should have just continued CC.

He usually goes to bed between 730 and eight. And gets up at 6:30. I am going to start putting him to bed earlier, it just seems like for the past few days when I've been meaning to we've had a lot going on.

I definitely For sure think that the problem is picking him up. He wants to be picked up and he's crying and waiting for you until you come do it. You are right that cc is really CIO with short checks to reassure the baby that you are still there. It's hard, but I think once they realize they won't be picked up or rocked they just go to sleep.

Thanks soo much for this post, if we get a blip I will just continue cos can see what you mean about it being alot harder to do when they are older. I have a 20month old toddler as well as my 6 month old. When my toddler was 8 weeks old we taught him to self settle as he was an awful sleeper (& I have to say it was alot less painful then as he got it really quickly & we used the spaced soothing technique which meant not many tears). That wont technique wont work with my 6 month old baby as we tried it first before the CC!

The good news is that we are now on day 5 without the dummy, nights 3 & 4 we have had no tears whatsoever (we've been up at 5am tho but I can handle that for the mo)!! Nights 1&2 were soo hard, the first night was 20mins before asleep with a 4am wake up (he was awake for 2hours before going back to sleep) and then night 2 he was awake for 1hr 50mins at 3am before going back to sleep. Im sure we will have many more night wakenings but I hope that they wont be so long, especially as I know now to make the checks brief & def no picking up if all ok.

I hadn't tackled naps in the cot until today (couldnt bear all the crying) so had been taking him out for walks for naps. The weather today helped force the issue nap1 he took 30mins to sleep and nap 2 10mins, hopefully we are getting somewhere. I feel confident that we might be so am def going to persevere