For those who have to / chose to work outside the home

[younglove]

What are some of the benefits of going back to work after having a baby?

We are planning to TTC in April for our first child. I've gone over our finances and I don't think we could afford for me to be a SAHM for more than a 12-18 months. DH doesn't make enough to support us and has little job security. I have a university degree, a professional designation and a very good job (high pay, benefits, vacation leave, etc.). If I left my job, it might take me years to get a similar job because the field is competitive and the economy here is not very good. We would also struggle financially. This would really scare me.

So I will probably be going back to work part-time or full-time after taking maternity leave. I'm not sure whether my manager would let me work part-time but I will try hard to convince her.

My mom and MIL were both SAHMs for many years. My mom ran a daycare. I guess I'm a bit jealous that my father and FIL made enough for my mother and MIL to be SAHMs. My DH doesn't make enough and we would struggle. I know it's not fair to put that kind of pressure on him.

I've always dreamt of being a SAHM but I might also regret giving up a career I'm proud of. Continuing to work will also allow me to better provide for my family over the short-term and long-term (10, 20, 30 years from now).

I plan to take one year of maternity leave. I also have 7 vacation weeks available (which I've banked over many years). Is that enough time? I imagine it will be hard to go back to work and leave my LO with someone else. My mom mentioned that maybe DH could stay home with the baby but I know I would feel sad/jealous if I worked and he stayed home.

For those who went back to work, could you share your experience? Why did you go back to work? What are some of the benefits of working after having a baby. For example, I imagine that daycare would promote development of social and other skills.

Thanks

 

[hulahoop09]

Hiya! Both me and hubby have to work to afford our bills and mortgage etc. I work 30 hours over 3 1/2 days (before having lo I did 37 hours over 5 days). Atm my dad has lo while we work but he may have to go back to work so we would have to put her in childcare which will leave us with little money but as I said unfortunately I cant afford to not work I do miss her but it wasnt difficult as I thought and I like that she will see working hard give you treats in life like days out and holidays etc

xx

 

[ArcaneSpark]

I've just gone back to work PT last week after nearly 14 months off with LO. I know that he is safe and happy at nursery. And meanwhile I am getting job satisfaction and furthering my career. I couldn't imagine how hard it would be to get back into my field if I left it till he went to school.

Also the upsides are, adult company, hot cups of tea, going to the toilet alone and lunch breaks!

X

 

[Pearls18]

For me I would always be a working mum, I love the 'adult time', I felt so disconnected from the world on maternity leave, I also enjoy my job. I genuinely believe my DS thrives better in day care than he would with me as they push him to do things I don't know about, I think the interaction with other children is great for him. We have the benefit of a double income family, so we make the most of the time off we do have together. And I believe I make more use of the time I have with Elliot now, quality over quantity. I ove being a mum, but I don't want to be entirely defined by my mum status, I love having something that's mine. Also means when he's all grown up I have a career I've developed over the years I have to say I dropped to 4 days a week last year and I found that to be a nicer balance than being full time, but I'd still work full time over SAHM.

Just to add I was in a fixed term contract when I went on mat leave, my perfect job came up when LO was 7 months so I went for it 37 hours a week and started working when he was 8 months, best thing I ever did for back then, I was young having Elliot and this just gave me a new lease of life, reminded me of who I was. I've since changed jobs and feel I have a better balance of work/home and don't feel so 'dependent' on my job for my sanity but still appreciate it.

 

[Stellae]

For me it was much easier leaving the baby when he was very little (2-3 months) than it is now (he's 6 months). It's one thing when you miss them, it's a whole new ball game when they miss you back and you KNOW it! But at the same time I love my job and it's very important to me. So it's great and very difficult to goto work at the same time!