Forum suggestion, plus size

[LadySlipper]

As mentioned in this thread (https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/pregnancy-second-trimester/2227853-plus-size-pregnant-board.html) a plus size forum would give those of us with size related issues in pregnancy a place to chat. Yes there is a thread for us to post to (https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/pregnancy-groups/2204205-any-plus-size-mummies.html). At the very least its popularity should give you an idea how popular a separate forum would be. But it moves so fast and you feel lost among the many women. A separate forum would allow for different threads on varying topics. That way everyone feels heard and have better support from each other.

We as plus size pregnant women often feel judged both online by those who aren't experiencing pregnancy the same way. And equally judged offline by friends, family, and doctors. So a place set aside for us would be nice. Much like how it helps those 35+, teens etc. It would also allow us to connect no matter our stage in pregnancy, from TTC through to delivery.

Thanks for your consideration.

 

[sethsmummy]

I definitely second this It would be nice for plus size women to have a place for sepperate threads instead of everything in just one thread.

Although one suggestion i would make is have a guidline. As a true plus size woman (uk size 26/28) I often feel worse when i see ladies who are a size 14 coming onto the thread saying they are 'fat' and plus size. Thats not really helpful for a truly plus size lady to be reading at such a sensitive time.

I know a lot of these ladies don't mean to make anyone feel worse and to themselves they truly do feel plus size.. but to me a PLUS SIZE board should be for women who are a uk size 18 plus (dont know other countries equivelants) or perhaps a BMI guidline? At least that way we that are on the heavier side dont feel ashamed at putting our weight amongst people who are not technically plus size. xx

 

[JanetPlanet]

I think this is a great idea! We need a place where we can discuss concerns openly and without judgment!

 

[maisie78]

I think it's a great idea too and agree with what Sethsmummy has said re guidelines as to what constitutes plus size.

 

[Amythyst]

Agreed - its needed. Although I'm not sure putting weight restrictions on the forum would be appropriate. In the US a 14-16 is technically "plus sized". I don't think we should restrict people just cause they aren't "big enough" for us to think they belong.

 

[Dini]

This is a must!! I feel a bit like a minority around here because most people are thin and aren't experiencing things the way I do.

It should be easier for the larger girls to find others for support!

 

[sethsmummy]

Agreed - its needed. Although I'm not sure putting weight restrictions on the forum would be appropriate. In the US a 14-16 is technically "plus sized". I don't think we should restrict people just cause they aren't "big enough" for us to think they belong.

maybe then 2 subsections. Because i really do feel put out sometimes when there are people sat there saying they are around 13 stone and are plus size and hate it. I honestly feel so small then because im 20 stone and am so so embarrased saying that. Its kind of like..well if they think they are plus sized at that stage then what does it make me. And i think a lot of truly plus size women would feel the same. Its a completely diferent scenario being just a little overweight (which a size 14-16 would be) to being a truly plus size person and we face very different complications and expereinces with doctors/midwives etc

 

[Amythyst]

Meh, I'm a pretty big big plus size myself but I don't feel put out when someone else who is smaller size than me is still "plus sized". Anyone overweight enough to be wearing plus sized clothes should not be discriminated against just cause some of us are larger than others.

However, I'm open to whatever... not trying to argue. I do think that it should be a section that is restricted to only members and does not allow "guests" to view it.

 

[Wobbles]

Hi,

After carefully considering this I'm afraid I don't see it as needed. We simply can't have a board for every situation. The boards are open for use by all and are not exclusive for one type of pregnancy. Where members want to group chat we have Groups & Discussions.

When I broke down the thread you mentioned which has been running for 4 months the average posts were 164 posts a month, 5/6 posts a day, that is not anywhere near what we would consider 'popular'.

Sorry it wasn't the answer you hoped for but thank you for submitting your suggestion.

 

[sethsmummy]

that sucks That's the second big thread I've been part of for plus size and pregnant. Nm ladies we tried and thank you again ladyslipper for making this post x

 

[Wobbles]

I'm afraid the stats show it really isn't a 'big' thread. Sorry!

 

[sethsmummy]

Thanks for looking Wobbles It is much appreciate hun.

 

[Wobbles]

 

[LadySlipper]

I think it would be more popular if it was spread out in a forum instead of being crammed into one thread. But I guess that is where we will have to agree to disagree.

Thank you for your reply.

 

[Wobbles]

I don't disagree you feel it would be welcomed by a % of the ladies but I do know what would and wouldn't benefit a forum so big and this additional suggestion among many others that have been requested over time isn't one that would not to mention the fact I don't feel it necessary to divide people from the forum sections because of their size.

As I mentioned before the pregnancy sections are not for one type of pregnancy. If I did agree start with this even as a trial it wouldn't be long before we'd get requests for more specific forums ... it would simply be too much (not user friendly).

We have tried and closed down many sections over time and if there is one thing I have learnt since day one of founding BnB it is you don't separate members too much where it is unnecessary and avoidable.

 

[Amythyst]

I respect your opinion but I see sections like "pregnant over 35" which segregates by nature and puts a distinction on age which is similar to separating people by weight. Also, that forum is not excessively active... the first 10 posts or so have been active in the last day or two but then it goes down to early November and then October all on the first page of the forum.

And again, respecting your opinion, I don't think having a plus sized section would "divide people". There are specific complications for weight related issues and its hard for people to find information pertaining to those things and how they are associated with pregnancy. For example, women with PCOS are generally overweight and face many different complications than a woman without PCOS. And it would be convenient for people to be able to find things in a specific place rather than it being lost in a sea of generic posts.

However, I won't "argue with the Gods" but just sharing an opposite view point.

 

[Wobbles]

Opinions don't make the forum work, this isn't about opinions, it's about knowing what is and isn't right for the forum as a whole. The thread used as an example is not a popular thread. Popular threads go on into the 100's of pages not 100's of posts. It isn't strong enough to sustain a whole new dedicated forum, it's not necessary and would not benefit the forum which matters above anything else.

We have Pregnancy groups for buddy/subject specific threads and Gestational Complications for problems /complications in pregnancy again another area that is not problem specific but open for all to get support. As for the dividing situation, you would be surprised maybe how many people would be offended to have a dedicated section just because they are a plus size.

I am closing the thread as we are going round and round but of course noting all your feedback ... as you have pointed out yourself though some of these forums we have opened for our members aren't excessively active, proves my point really A couple of times a year I do a review of the forum, any areas I feel are not active enough to carry on needing it's own section are removed.