special_kala
love my bugs
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Hey ladies, im sorry its taken so long to update with our birth story 
It was a long old process so ill try and break it down a bit.
Friday -
We went for induction due too reduced movements and partly me telling the consultant that i felt something wasn't right. Arrived at 9.30 and they finally got around to doing the first 24 hour pessary at 3. Already on the CTGs Fox was being very relaxed.
The next 3/4 days were spent spending a extra 20 minutes on the monitor to get some variability.
I know from previous pregnancies i have a shy cervix
which is very high and difficult to reach. All they needed was enough dilation to break my waters but apparently mine didnt want to play ball in the slighest.
Saturday - Second pessary. No change at all! Same just about ok CTGs.
Sunday - Rest day from induction. Still no change at all. I spent 2 days walking and bouncing to try and get him to put some pressure down but nothing changed.
Monday - The doctor wanted a scan and basically wanted to fob me off. He expected to see a normal moving baby and to tell me that i just couldn't feel it. Fox was 2/5 engaged but was suddenly back to being free
.
The scan showed a baby who only moved slightly even when prodded and who wasnt practicing his breathing like he should. It also showed that he had switched sides which so his legs were kicking my anterior placenta. I got very upset during the scan because i was terrified they would send me home and even the small movements i was feeling would be gone because of his position change and id have no idea if he were ok.
We started on the 6 hour pessary, no change after the 1st one. 2nd one put in.
Tuesday -
No change at all and basically had reached the end of the line induction wise. The doctor came on her rounds and wanted to examine me herself which i stupidly allowed her to do. I just wanted him out and safe at this point, i was crying everytime a MW spoke to me and couldnt stay collected enough to explain properly explain how i felt and that my gut was screaming at me not to let them carry on.
The doctor decided after a very rough examination that she could actually break my waters and i was a good 2cm (how much she fudged those numbers i dont know). I wasnt happy about it and felt completely pushed into the decision, she offered a epidural
because i was obviously very uncomfortable but i declined and used gas and air. All during the talk and getting of the gas and air she didnt take her fingers out which im sure is because she knew if she did i would be able to think clearer and refuse.
My waters broke with a big gush which gave me hope that was all he needed to engage and me go into labour and just get him in my arms.
They put me on the monitor and it became very clear to me and DH that we made the wrong decision. Fox's heartbeat was dropping from his normal 120 to 60/70 with even the smallest tightening that i couldnt even feel.
It came up quickly but i just knew that everything i was thinking was right. Every single CTG made me realise more that i had a incredible relxed boy on my hands who was in trouble and i genuinely didnt think that he would be able to cope with any kind of lengthy labour and considering how much effort they had to make to even get me to this stage i knew it was very likely.
We got moved to the delivery suite which rang alarm bells as i had seen 8+ women being induced on that ward and none were moved until in established labour.
I point blank refused the drip to induce contractions. I knew that my body would resist it and that the sudden contractions would put Fox under too much pressure. Basically unless my body suddenly went into labour on its own i wanted a csection.
The original doctor came back in trying to cover her ass as i made it clear to my (very lovely) MW that i felt pushed into my waters being broken. Thankfully there was a shift change though and i was handed over to a new doctor.
At this point i felt incredible clear headed and was able to explain to the doctor that i wasnt a woman who feared pain or labour. I still had my homebirth hat on which told me that the safest thing for me and Fox was to follow my instincts no matter what. The new doctor listened to me and actually heard what i was trying to say, i explained that i understand doctors have procedures to follow and boxes to tick but that i wasnt willing to sit and watch my baby get weaker and weaker and those decels get longer and longer, i wouldnt wait at home watching my toddler get sick to the point of emergency intervention needed so i was not willing to do that to my baby.
I knew if i let them use the drip he wouldnt cope and i would end up with a emergency csection anyway which would have doubled the impact on him.
She agreed and we were told that we would be going down at 5pm as id eaten something. I think this was around 2.30. DH went to grab sme food while he could.
I was hoping that my body when threatened with csection would start up and him be born quickly within the next few hours but a few minutes after my husband left me and the MW were talking and i noticed the heartrate go down to 60 and stay there. I actually said to the MW "oh i think its picking me up instead of him shall i move" but she had already noticed and very casually but quickly walked over to the wall and hit the emergency button. Exactly what i thought was going to happen was, a slightly stronger tightening (not even contraction) and he struggled to perk back up.
I called DH and told him to come back and we were taken to theatre within a few minutes of the last decel.
Whilst i was prepared for a csection (sort of lol) i think it suddenly happening now made my mind go blank and i started shivering and panicking.
I got prepped very quickly and things started. Its a incredible strange feeling feeling that someone is touching you but not knowing what they are doing. His heartrate did the same thing whilst i was being prepped.
I felt some pressure and they asked DH if he wanted to look as his head was out. The cord was round his neck twice but as soon as they took it off he cried
When i heard that i swear i breathed properly for the first time since the first big decel.
He was taken and looked over by the doctor and DH was able to cut his cord shorter and then put on my chest while they stitched me up. He promptly pooed on my chest
My boy was finally in my arms and safe
None of my experience is a reflection on how induction usually goes. Most of the other mums who passed through the ward were first time mums who were induced very easily.
I am so so glad i listened to my gut instinct and decided against homebirth. I knew something wasnt right and it hit me a few days ago that had i gone overdue and into labour at home i would have had no idea that he might struggle with labour. That again is no reflection on homebirth. It is incredible safe when mum feels its safe. Following your instinct is massive part of a safe delivery.
If you look at my notes everything was bordeline just about ok but i know in my heart of hearts that things could easily have gone very wrong.
I dont want anyone reading this to think of it as a negative birth story. It was a bit of a ordeal mind
Ladies always listen to your instincts, we know our bodies and our babies better then anyone. Even if you think they will think your being silly or dramatic dont let that stop you from saying no you listen to me. Sometimes we know our babies better then doctors and machines and things dont need to get to the point of medical emergency before they take action.
It was a long old process so ill try and break it down a bit.
Friday -
We went for induction due too reduced movements and partly me telling the consultant that i felt something wasn't right. Arrived at 9.30 and they finally got around to doing the first 24 hour pessary at 3. Already on the CTGs Fox was being very relaxed.
The next 3/4 days were spent spending a extra 20 minutes on the monitor to get some variability.
I know from previous pregnancies i have a shy cervix
which is very high and difficult to reach. All they needed was enough dilation to break my waters but apparently mine didnt want to play ball in the slighest.Saturday - Second pessary. No change at all! Same just about ok CTGs.
Sunday - Rest day from induction. Still no change at all. I spent 2 days walking and bouncing to try and get him to put some pressure down but nothing changed.
Monday - The doctor wanted a scan and basically wanted to fob me off. He expected to see a normal moving baby and to tell me that i just couldn't feel it. Fox was 2/5 engaged but was suddenly back to being free
.The scan showed a baby who only moved slightly even when prodded and who wasnt practicing his breathing like he should. It also showed that he had switched sides which so his legs were kicking my anterior placenta. I got very upset during the scan because i was terrified they would send me home and even the small movements i was feeling would be gone because of his position change and id have no idea if he were ok.
We started on the 6 hour pessary, no change after the 1st one. 2nd one put in.
Tuesday -
No change at all and basically had reached the end of the line induction wise. The doctor came on her rounds and wanted to examine me herself which i stupidly allowed her to do. I just wanted him out and safe at this point, i was crying everytime a MW spoke to me and couldnt stay collected enough to explain properly explain how i felt and that my gut was screaming at me not to let them carry on.
The doctor decided after a very rough examination that she could actually break my waters and i was a good 2cm (how much she fudged those numbers i dont know). I wasnt happy about it and felt completely pushed into the decision, she offered a epidural
because i was obviously very uncomfortable but i declined and used gas and air. All during the talk and getting of the gas and air she didnt take her fingers out which im sure is because she knew if she did i would be able to think clearer and refuse.My waters broke with a big gush which gave me hope that was all he needed to engage and me go into labour and just get him in my arms.
They put me on the monitor and it became very clear to me and DH that we made the wrong decision. Fox's heartbeat was dropping from his normal 120 to 60/70 with even the smallest tightening that i couldnt even feel.
It came up quickly but i just knew that everything i was thinking was right. Every single CTG made me realise more that i had a incredible relxed boy on my hands who was in trouble and i genuinely didnt think that he would be able to cope with any kind of lengthy labour and considering how much effort they had to make to even get me to this stage i knew it was very likely.
We got moved to the delivery suite which rang alarm bells as i had seen 8+ women being induced on that ward and none were moved until in established labour.
I point blank refused the drip to induce contractions. I knew that my body would resist it and that the sudden contractions would put Fox under too much pressure. Basically unless my body suddenly went into labour on its own i wanted a csection.
The original doctor came back in trying to cover her ass as i made it clear to my (very lovely) MW that i felt pushed into my waters being broken. Thankfully there was a shift change though and i was handed over to a new doctor.
At this point i felt incredible clear headed and was able to explain to the doctor that i wasnt a woman who feared pain or labour. I still had my homebirth hat on which told me that the safest thing for me and Fox was to follow my instincts no matter what. The new doctor listened to me and actually heard what i was trying to say, i explained that i understand doctors have procedures to follow and boxes to tick but that i wasnt willing to sit and watch my baby get weaker and weaker and those decels get longer and longer, i wouldnt wait at home watching my toddler get sick to the point of emergency intervention needed so i was not willing to do that to my baby.
I knew if i let them use the drip he wouldnt cope and i would end up with a emergency csection anyway which would have doubled the impact on him.
She agreed and we were told that we would be going down at 5pm as id eaten something. I think this was around 2.30. DH went to grab sme food while he could.
I was hoping that my body when threatened with csection would start up and him be born quickly within the next few hours but a few minutes after my husband left me and the MW were talking and i noticed the heartrate go down to 60 and stay there. I actually said to the MW "oh i think its picking me up instead of him shall i move" but she had already noticed and very casually but quickly walked over to the wall and hit the emergency button. Exactly what i thought was going to happen was, a slightly stronger tightening (not even contraction) and he struggled to perk back up.
I called DH and told him to come back and we were taken to theatre within a few minutes of the last decel.
Whilst i was prepared for a csection (sort of lol) i think it suddenly happening now made my mind go blank and i started shivering and panicking.
I got prepped very quickly and things started. Its a incredible strange feeling feeling that someone is touching you but not knowing what they are doing. His heartrate did the same thing whilst i was being prepped.
I felt some pressure and they asked DH if he wanted to look as his head was out. The cord was round his neck twice but as soon as they took it off he cried
When i heard that i swear i breathed properly for the first time since the first big decel.
He was taken and looked over by the doctor and DH was able to cut his cord shorter and then put on my chest while they stitched me up. He promptly pooed on my chest
My boy was finally in my arms and safe
None of my experience is a reflection on how induction usually goes. Most of the other mums who passed through the ward were first time mums who were induced very easily.
I am so so glad i listened to my gut instinct and decided against homebirth. I knew something wasnt right and it hit me a few days ago that had i gone overdue and into labour at home i would have had no idea that he might struggle with labour. That again is no reflection on homebirth. It is incredible safe when mum feels its safe. Following your instinct is massive part of a safe delivery.
If you look at my notes everything was bordeline just about ok but i know in my heart of hearts that things could easily have gone very wrong.
I dont want anyone reading this to think of it as a negative birth story. It was a bit of a ordeal mind
Ladies always listen to your instincts, we know our bodies and our babies better then anyone. Even if you think they will think your being silly or dramatic dont let that stop you from saying no you listen to me. Sometimes we know our babies better then doctors and machines and things dont need to get to the point of medical emergency before they take action.
I think what you did for Fox is amazing! He's here safe and sound all thanks to you! 
xx
