Going to be a single mommy of an almost 6 month old...

[kellysays2u]

Hey everyone. My name is Kelly I am 18. I have a daughter named Athena (she will be 6 months on the 17th) and a dead beat soon to be Ex-Boyfriend(he is 19). We have been VERY rocky for a LONG time but he keeps begging me to stay. Making me feel guilty for messing up Athenas life... I just don't know how to leave him. I mean I still "love him" but I am not "in love" with him anymore if any of you can understand that. He gets VERY angry every time I go to leave. Refuses to pay child support used to say he would take Athena then saying he wouldn't want to see her. He can't handle her at all. She cries and he gets all pissed off and says really scary mean stuff and says why dont we just put her up for adoption then we would be fine. I just don't know what to do... I am SOOO lost and so scared. I HATE being alone by myself. I get very scared. I just am not sure I can be a single mom at all and am afraid I will just give in and be unhappy for the rest of my life just for Athena and Him...

 

[2bmum]

I've been a single mum since day one and was very overwhelmed and found it very daunting, but I am loving it now. Don't get me wrong, it can be tough but I get to make all the decisions and bring him up how I want to.

You have to put your lo and yourself first. I know what its like to lve but not be in love anymore, even when they treat you like sh**.Do you have the support of your family? Have you spoken to them about hoe you feel? Do you have anywhere to go? Be strong, and even if you just go to family/friends for a week or two you'll have a chance to get your head straight without the pressure of o/h and make a decision about what you're going to do.

Big and take care, remember lo and yourself come first, and babies do pick up on things/tension in the house so do what you feel is right whether that is starting out in what seems to be the big scary world of single parenting or trying to worth things out with o/h.

 

[Novbaby08]

As 2bmum said, its very overwhelming and daunting. But I also have been a single mom since day 1. And I love it now. I love being her sole parent. You can do it! You can do better then him as well

 

[purpledahlia]

wow what a nasty boy he sounds. Telling you to put her up for adoption!? i would slap him.

If you are not in love with him i would leave, Go somewhere else if you have it if not apply for council house, Baby needs you and you have to be strong, being single could be the best thing thats might happen to you, you will grow and come into your own, be free to make all the decisions and be the one in control ( he sounds like he is in control and he likes it that way )

Just take it step by step,

Do you have support elsewhere... sort that out first, then sort out somewhere to move too, then sort out csa payments, just ring them up ocne you have moved and they will deal with it. If hes the aggresive type maybe writing a letter to him would be the best way to explain whats going on and leave it with him when you go. Its not fair on the baby to be in a tense atmosphere all the time, soon enough she will be starting to copy what she hears and if shes around him it sounds like she wont be hearing very nice things. Babies self esteem can get damaged at this stage even before they can talk back and stuff. you really need to get her into a positive atmosphere, you will be fine, its daunting but you will cope. Single mums are super mums. Think oif Anthea.. xx