GRR! Being Sidelined by Stupid Stupid People! [Vent Thread]

[Seraphim]

I love my job.
But I don't see how this is going to work out

I wouldn't describe myself as a 'career-mum' type, I plan to take 12 months mat leave, and I think I have a good take on the work/life balance... I could probably juggle the finances and shelve work for longer, but I don't want to. I want to progress and grow, and I wouldn't turn my nose up at earning lots more money!

But everything feels like it's failing apart because my employers don't seem to know what's good for them.

The MD has gone from describing a senario whereby they recruit a junior to cover my leave, who I prep work/schedule for - to looking to recruit a direct replacement.

As much as a direct replacement is ok, and leaves me with a lot less stress... I'm starting to feel like I'm being side lined.

I can understand any smart employer may worry that they'll be left in the lurch if a female employee chooses not to return after mat leave... but normally they do everything in their power to make coming back *desirable* - not bring in a replacement months before she's even started leave!

I know a lot of this is personality based.
I'm honest, direct and straight forward, and I expect people to believe me.
So when I say I love my job and I'll be back - I don't expect them to get all sneaky on me.

There's a seriously high chance they won't be able to afford a direct replacement on short term contract. I know I shouldn't care, but I'm dying for this to happen and for them to realise just how much *extra* I've brought to the role which isn't included in my job description.

I now face having to do the 'smart' thing and refresh my CV

Maybe I'm just feeling a little emotional today, it just seems crazy because it's not what I want, and it's not what's best for them either

I wish I could say "you're forcing me to look elsewhere, is this really what you want" - but the thought lingers, that maybe they don't want a new mum on the team, and maybe I'd just be making it easier for them to dump me. And that just makes me want to stick to my guns and shove it to them.

It could be a really positive thing, having someone decent hold the department together while I'm gone... not having to worry about returning to a mess... and even the glimmer of hope that they might choose to double-track the workload and maintain an expanded department on my return...

It's just the complete change of direction from the MD, and the lack of transparancy which has swept in since he discussed it with the CEO/Owner of the company. My instinct tells me this is all going to turn into one big stink.

I haven't worked in many places, so I guess this is all far more daughnting than it may be for others. I've got a mobility impairment (which I more than make up for with dedication), a big hole in my CV where I was years having surgery, and now I'm going to be a mum... and the later totally makes me feel impeeded when it comes to interviewing... it's not like I have 10 years experience to bolster me up.

Anyone else out there who's making or made this leap after mat leave?

If we weren't expecting, and trying to safeguard our finances I'd been interviewing left right and centre, but it's taken this for them to show their true colours

 

[Blondie]

You have my full sympathy

I'm currently trying to figure out what on earth I will do after maternity leave - we can save up enough to allow me to take a full year off and still pay the mortgage (I am the higher earner in our household - not by a huge amount but when it comes to paying the mortgage it needs 2 salaries!).

Trouble is I'm not particularly happy (or maybe I should say very unhappy) in my current job and I have discussed with the FD numerous times about how we can restructure my job so i add more value to the company and get more satisfaction out of my role (I currently feel like my career is going backwards). Trouble is that now I've announced pregnancy - suddenly all plans for change are sidelined (make that even more sidelined as there was never much progress with them anyway) and I just know that when I return it will be to exactly the same position I'm in now which makes me so miserable.

I've decided my only option is to leave working in industry (I'm an accountant) and set up in practice with a friend. We have now set up the business and are gradually building up clients (well we have one so far ) but I'm desperately hoping that by the time our cash stash runs out next September / October we will have enough clients that I can not return to my job and just work from home in my own business.

I just sometimes wish that we weren't so reliant on my salary to get by every month as it would be lovely to be in a situation where I could just be a stay at home mum for a few years if I wanted to - but unfortunately I married a teacher and not a millionaire

 

[AP]

By law, the job you have now should be the same as how you left it.

 

[Seraphim]

It's a bitter sweet relief to hear it's not just me.

I managed to get an agreement today for a financial contribution of 1/3 towards the diploma I want to study. (Although when I was offered the job it was phrased as 'successful candidate must be willing to undertake diploma...') I think that's the only reason I got it though. That and organising it myself, plus the other 2/3 funding.

I've been having these 'restructuring' type discussions with the MD... they've recently been withdrawn.

I've watched the CEO/Owner replace two members of staff without them having a clue... sadly it's not just hormonal paranoia :/

I made a few decisions since my first post to get myself as prepped for my next role as possible. So, becoming a chartered member, the dip, learning to use the common project management software that the bigger organisations use...

I've got a review in June... whilst I have no fears over my performance... I'm still wondering if I should have representation. My place as so disorganised, everything gets left in mid air, and I suffer the 'last link in the chain' situation of clearing up after their bad habits. Hopefully I'll have more news/ideas about my personal plan of attack by the time that comes around, and maybe I'll have organised an escape route.

It is shocking though that whatever laws are put in place - you can't escape this.

I informed work of my pregnancy at 9 weeks... I could be waiting til late august and sod off almost immediately on early maternity leave - but I thought they might return the respect I offered in telling them early and providing them with all the mat law info.

Humph.

 

[Seraphim]

By law, the job you have now should be the same as how you left it.

Sadly, the law doesn't stop an employer putting every damn obsticle in your way and making you fight for a fair deal.

Or from making you so miserable and underappreciated that you WANT to leave.

Whilst you should have the same job - AND not be disadvantaged from any promotion you would have otherwise received... If they don't commit to a firm personal development plan, then you have nothing to argue with. And many people don't envisage themselves stagnating in the 'SAME' job.