Hate having breasts touched? (TMI) Advice please...

[designer]

Hi everyone, sorry if this is TMI, but for most of my life, I have hated having my breasts, and especially my nipples, touched. It has been a problem in relationships I've had in the past. Even when they get brushed against in the shower or against clothes, I hate it, hate it, hate it. I don't know how to explain it, it makes me feel like I'm being violated, and gets me quite angry and turned off. The only time I'm okay with them being touched is for a few seconds when we're in the heat of the moment, dtd, and I'm really turned on. Other than that I can't stand it, not even in foreplay.

I keep telling my DF I hate it but it's like he's deaf and doesn't really get it (yet). I have googled this and it looks like A LOT of women have the same issue.

Because of this I'm a little terrified of breastfeeding. Even seeing pictures of women breastfeeding makes me feel uncomfortable. I'm hoping the "feeling" will be different when my LO gets here. Anyone else feel this way in general but made it out okay nursing their babies? Please, any advice would be appreciated!

 

[LDC]

Hi there, I haven't personally, but my best friend was the same. She breast fed and said that her opinion totally changed when she had her baby and she was able to feed and not feel strange about it. I do have another friend who couldn't breast feed though because she found it uncomfortable and didn't like the thought of her breasts being used differently (she was the opposite to you though and liked hers being touched during intercourse).

Whatever happens you'll do best for your baby so don't be too hard on yourself either way. I think you'll know straight away when baby is here what you feel comfortable with and what you don't; ultimately it's just something you manage at the time and either way your baby will still be fed and have your love which is all they want

Xx

 

[TheNewMrs]

I have this! For me it is as a result of sexual abuse and I cant stand it. Breastfeeding is entirely different though. The sensation of a baby feeding is nothing like sex, foreplay, or even a partner sucking on your nips. For me it was very healing. It felt good to actually use my breasts for what they were designed for. But once she would come off I found it hard to even rub milk into them to prevent soreness. I hate hate hate having them touched. Maybe 6 months of breastfeeding have desensitized me a little but my husband is thrilled I stuck with BF... Things have improved so much in the bedroom dept! Go for it mama!

 

[designer]

I have this! For me it is as a result of sexual abuse and I cant stand it. Breastfeeding is entirely different though. The sensation of a baby feeding is nothing like sex, foreplay, or even a partner sucking on your nips. For me it was very healing. It felt good to actually use my breasts for what they were designed for. But once she would come off I found it hard to even rub milk into them to prevent soreness. I hate hate hate having them touched. Maybe 6 months of breastfeeding have desensitized me a little but my husband is thrilled I stuck with BF... Things have improved so much in the bedroom dept! Go for it mama!

That is so comforting to know...thank you! I, too, was sexually abused as a child and I believe that has something to do with it as well. Although I know of a lot of people who weren't abused who have the same issue. Glad to know the sensation is different when a baby is feeding. What a relief. I'll just try and stay positive and keep up with my plan to breastfeed my LO for as long as I can help it!

 

[designer]

Hi there, I haven't personally, but my best friend was the same. She breast fed and said that her opinion totally changed when she had her baby and she was able to feed and not feel strange about it. I do have another friend who couldn't breast feed though because she found it uncomfortable and didn't like the thought of her breasts being used differently (she was the opposite to you though and liked hers being touched during intercourse).

Whatever happens you'll do best for your baby so don't be too hard on yourself either way. I think you'll know straight away when baby is here what you feel comfortable with and what you don't; ultimately it's just something you manage at the time and either way your baby will still be fed and have your love which is all they want

Xx

Thank you. I think part of the problem is that breasts have become so sexualized in our conscience. The media uses "breasts" to sell everything from cars to cheeseburgers, yet breastfeeding (what they're MEANT to be used for) is a controversial topic in some circles. You're right. I think and hope the motherly instinct will just kick in once my baby is here and hopefully this won't be such a problem then.

 

[staralfur]

I cringe at the thought of my nipples being touched. Even when my LO was overdue and I was trying everything to get her out I looked at "nipple stimulation" and said no way.

Honestly I didn't even think about it in terms of feeding, though. It doesn't bother me one bit.

 

[katlin]

I've always found touching my breasts and nipples a turn off it just completely rubs me the wrong a way yuck. I also have very sensitive nipples, but for me having a baby at the breast is absolutely nothing like when my oh tries to touch them. The initial latch is quite uncomfortable but once were past that its a walk in the park and I find it very relaxing.

 

[bananaz]

I had the same issue and was also worried about breastfeeding, but it really hasn't been a problem at all and I think BFing has actually made my nipples less sensitive (which is a good thing!). Obviously the first few weeks were super painful, and even now I still don't think I'd appreciate a partner messing with my nipples, but nursing my baby has been very natural and not weird or scary at all. I hope you have the same experience!

 

[TheNewMrs]

I had the same issue and was also worried about breastfeeding, but it really hasn't been a problem at all and I think BFing has actually made my nipples less sensitive (which is a good thing!). Obviously the first few weeks were super painful, and even now I still don't think I'd appreciate a partner messing with my nipples, but nursing my baby has been very natural and not weird or scary at all. I hope you have the same experience!

I just thought it worth mentioning that if a new mother experiences any pain at all, she should seek help with the babys latch. Pain is not normal, although it is common, pain indicates something isnt quite right so OP please seek help if for any reason you experience pain. x

 

[Geegees]

I'm the same! The thought just turns my stomach! But breast feeding is absolutely fine.. It's never been a issue, I've even brushed my nipples with clothes and it hasn't bothered me! (Which is a huge breakthrough!!)
Congratulations on your pregnancy

 

[designer]

Thank you, everyone. Very reassuring info. You guys are wonderful!