Hates school :(

[Tiff]

So my kiddo was very excited to start school this September. She should have gone to JK last year but she didn't have her Autism diagnosis yet and has a late birthday (mid December) so we opted to put her into a private preschool to give her a bit of time to "catch up" so to speak.

Here SK is full day, every day. She was excited to go at first but now she's quite agitated and upset when the school van comes to get her each morning. She's got limited speech so its hard for her to tell me WHY she doesn't want to go, just that she doesn't want to.

It doesn't help either that she's fallen and skinned her knees really badly at school two days in a row, and yesterday she had a big scratch on her back from hiding underneath a desk. She shares an EA with another kiddo, and I don't know the particulars if she was hiding as she was overwhelmed (she'll do that) or was playing (she does that too).

I don't know what to do! I do know they're being pretty strict with her for following the school routines and she really has a hard time doing that. She's very much a "march to the beat of her own drum" kind of girl.

Anyone have any advice? I've written notes to the teacher asking the same thing but they just say back that she's fine and just adjusting to school.

Blah, I'm sure I sound like a crazy over protective Mommy. It just breaks my heart to see her so upset.

 

[maisie78]

That's a tough one I don't think I'd be happy with the school's response to your concerns because they are valid. You know you're child and can tell there is something not right and their response feels a little like a brush off. Of course you can't be in the class with her so I would be asking for a more detailed report either every few days or a scheduled chat with someone each Friday just until you are also satisfied that all this is is a period of adjustment. GL xx

 

[JASMAK]

Oh no! What a rough start. I say, give her some more time. I think if that happened to any kid...they'd be feeling the same. Poor thing. I think strict can be good...so wait and see. She may come around.

 

[Peanut78]

Sorry to hear that Tiff

My T just started at "big" school as well and although he is ok, I am finding the "impersonal" nature of a larger school a bit hard to deal with.

I think Jasmak is right - give it time. In the meantime keep really open communication with her teachers. What does EA say (I am guessing EA is like a shadow teacher/ teaching assistant?)?

 

[Tiff]

EA is "Educational Assistant". Basically someone who's trained in helping special needs kiddos and stays with them. Claire has to have one as she's a flight risk and really doesn't understand safety.

I'm hoping it'll just take more time as well. I packed her into the car seat in the van today with her sobbing her heart out saying she wanted to stay with me. I liked it better when she was excited for school!!!!

 

[JASMAK]

oh gosh! How heart wrenching. Can ou stay with her a bit?

 

[mummy2o]

I would give it until half term, Christmas at a push. If by half term she hasn't settled and you spoke to the teachers who won't help or include your child in the way you feel fit I would start looking for a new school. Although it might have seemed the right choice at the time, it isn't until the child starts you can see the flaws.

My son is rather placid on the other hand and doesn't mind going to school, but in my mind they are singling him out as being special. They don't push him into doing any work, he sets up what he wants to do, if he doesn't want to do assembly they don't make him, although I know he is capable as he was doing it fine until this year when he had a new teacher. In the three years he's been at the school its got worse and worse. If I know what I do now, I would of sent him to a different school which is a bit further away, but they do a lot more than they do at his current school.

 

[lindblum]

My oldest started nursery just before she turned 4 and she loved it at first. Then after a little while she told me in her own way that she didn't like school. I also tried to get a reason but she couldn't say. She even refused to get out of bed. I mentioned it to the staff but they couldn't see any reason, so i started sitting in for the first 10-20 mins or so. She didn't play nice with the the kids and refused to share. She couldn't talk/communicate with others at that point. I think she just couldn't understand or follow their rules. She did grow out of it though, within a few months. I hope everything is ok now. x