He didn't even do anything...

[brownhairedmom]

I'm having a hormonal trip over Adam again. He didn't even do anything horrible, I haven't been talking to him for weeks. I just got a letter in the mail saying that after April they aren't giving me anymore student loan. That doesn't really help me much because I'm still going to have 6 courses left to pay for by myself

I'm just so...like...angry, upset...I don't even know what to call it. I blame this on him. If he wasn't such a psychotic ******* I would have been able to stay in St. John's this summer, took my 5 courses, and graduated. Now I'm going to be until next December/April and its really discouraging. I'd be graduated, I'd be able to get a real job to be able to take care of my baby.

It just riles me up because I know he's out there not working, living off his mother and other suspicious means of getting money, driving around in his car that his mother bought him, dating, and being the same asshole he always was. He doesn't have to give up anything.

I'm to a point now that I'm not resentful of getting pregnant because I love my little girl more than life itself and I do not regret her. I just want him to have to give something up. I want him to own up and take some freakin' responsbility. I want him to have to change his life as well.

He disgusts me so much. I'm not jealous of his life because his life sucks and one of these days he's going to piss off the wrong person. He's going to borrow money from the wrong person, or get himself into a scene he can't get himself out of. I don't want him around my baby.

I know this sounds horrible but I want revenge really. It just absolutely drives me insane knowing he hasn't had to change his life one little bit because of something he is 50% responsible for. I'm 100% responsible for something I'm only half to blame for. Actually, only 1/4 to blame for. Our relationship was so crappy when I got pregnant that the only reason we even had sex that night was because he was accusing me of cheating on him because I didn't want sex, so I did it to keep the peace for another few weeks


Arg I just wish karma would hit him back with everything he deserves.

 

[codegirl]

Karma will get him... it might be a while down the road but Karma ALWAYS gets even!

Have you thought about going after him for some support? That might help you get through school and take some of the pressure off.

 

[brownhairedmom]

If I go after him for child support,he gets rights to the child. I'm not putting him on the birth certificate, I don't want him involved in making any decisions regarding my daughter. I just want him to drop off the face of the earth. I want him to drive himself into financial ruin so he can't live his lifestyle that he prides over everything else on this earth, even his own daughter

 

[Younglutonmum]

It was you who told me that Karma is a bitch so remember that hun!!

What goes around comes around & one day he'll meet his downfall

He really is a knob!!!



xxx

 

[brownhairedmom]

It was you who told me that Karma is a bitch so remember that hun!!

What goes around comes around & one day he'll meet his downfall

He really is a knob!!!



xxx

I just want karma to hurry up

 

[Wobbles]

Going after him for support when he sponges off his Mummy will get nowhere

*hugs* he'll get his moment Rae even if you aren't aware of it x I don't understand these student loans but there must be an adviser you can talk to?

 

[brownhairedmom]

They can't do anything for me. I'll have passed my alloted time to graduate from my degree in April. I'll have gone over how long it normally takes to graduate from my program. I just can't do it because the courses I need aren't offered because I had to switch campuses

 

[Wobbles]

You are not able to return and pick up where you left off? Soz if I'm being dumb I didn't do school erm lol! x

 

[brownhairedmom]

not being dumb! Its a confusing system!

If I take a break then I have to start paying back my loan at $300 a month payments. i can't do that if I can't get a job, and I can't get a job if I can't finish school. Catch 22. I mean, I could get a job at a store or a resturant, but our min wage is so crap here. It wouldn't be nearly enough, it would be more a waste of my time than a benefit.

I may work this summer instead of taking it off like I had intended to do, to save money and pay for 4 courses or so in September

 

[Wobbles]

Hope your work it out hun *hugs*

 

[codegirl]

In Alberta we can fill out a form to have our student loan payments put on "hold" if we aren't making enough money (or not making any money). Can you check and see if you have any programs like that. It might just help take off the pressure for a bit while you work it all out.

 

[nikky0907]

I hope he 'enjoys' the little time he has left living this lifestyle cause it's gonna bite him in the @ss very soon!

And he'll end up alone like a dog.... Can't wait to see it!

School paying system sucks!
The only reason why I can't take a nhice year off is because I would loose my scholarship (I have a partial athletic,partial academic).
And there is no way I can cash out 100 000 $ a year!

 

[carries]

awwww hun think of it this way. Yes his life hasnt had to change and he hasnt had to make any sacrificaes but his life doesnt get to change for the better either. He wont get any of the smiles, kisses and cuddles and total unconditional love that you will. Just try and rememebr all that he is missing out on!

 

[maybebaby]

I am sorry that you have to go through this, but I know you will get through it because you are such an amazing girl!!

 

[brownhairedmom]

I think my dad is going to pay for a semester for me. Hopefully. I'm going to up my course load so I can graduate next December