Thanks all
As I said in the original thread a few days ago we have already decided that, tempting though it is, we need to face the situation head on in an honest way.
We have already tried speaking to FOB separately about the situation, but to no avail - he wants unsupervised access, Kaylum to stay at his Mother's 2 days and nights a week and a host of other demands which are totally inappropriate given that scrunchy man is only 8 weeks old, let alone the other factors
![dohh :dohh: :dohh:](/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/doh.gif)
He then contradicts his demands by insisting that a DNA test be taken by his Mother rather than through my daughter's GP - which is what I had already arranged (he refused to attend for a swab to be taken)
![Shrugg :shrug: :shrug:](/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/srug.gif)
NB - we had already offered access whenever he wanted it in our home - it was refused.
So.... we are going to go with the CSA doing the test to ensure that it is done properly and that the result is definitive and legal (they can force him to take it properly - we can't) and we will then deal with the family courts. Apart from the CSA part we won't be initiating anything... just firefighting as and when stuff comes up.
It isn't just his drink and drugs - it is his own diagnosis of schizophrenia with violent psychotic episodes and his criminal history for violence, so there isn't any chance that he will get more than supervised access, and his Mother won't even be granted permission to apply to the courts for access on her own account. If she keeps up the harrassment (all of which is being logged and texts/emails kept) then we will just have to apply for a restraining order.
The whole situation is a mess, but Tattie made her bed and we just have to lay in it
![Shrugg :shrug: :shrug:](/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/srug.gif)
As someone said - without FOB we wouldn't have the little fella at all, and we certainly wouldn't be without him - he is simply adorable
![Very Happy :D :D](/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif)
It just seemed like an easy way out - not a sensible one admittedly - but I guess life is never easy .... well not for us anyway
![nope :nope: :nope:](/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/nope.gif)
and Kaylum is worth the fight
![Very Happy :D :D](/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif)