help!! couple with seperate children

[alanajade27]

Im not sure if this question falls under the right category so im sorry if I offend anyone


my partner has a 2 year old daughter ans I have a 9 year old son. He is not my biological son he is my cousin but I have been his mother figure and lookong after him since he was 4 and he calls me mum.


I am sooo excited to get pregnant and add to our family but I am scared that because my partner has been through this before he will ruin it for me. I also work in child care so I know quiet a bit about children. But he is very adament on how he does things with hia daughter and its not necessarily the way I would do things. Can we make this work? I am 22 he is 26

 

[seoj]

I think (before you TTC) you and your OH need to sit down and have a good talk about where you both stand with how to raise your kids. They should all have a consistent environment-- his, yours and the child you make together. My hubby had a 9yr old when we started dating- he was a full time single dad. And honestly seeing how he was with his daughter only made me love him more. We don't always see eye to eye- I'm more laxed about certain things, and visa versa. But we always communicate and we are on the same team. Sometimes- with bigger decisions- we will talk to one another first, before we tell our oldest what we decide. We do have very similar parenting styles- but our oldest is his first baby girl- and he's a protective dad, so I have to remind him sometimes to give her some freedoms- still with boundaries and rules. She's very responsible now- she's 16! With our LO- we are the same. We just communicate and yes, there are bumps, like with any couple raising kids together- but there is for sure good ways to make it go more smoothly

At the end of the day- you both need to be a united front. Obviously communicate, listen and find compromise when needed. Just always back one another up It's us against the kids! LOL. I'm only half kidding!