He's just walked out

[molly1207]

So, OH has just packed up his stuff and left me and my little girl. Not even said goodbye to her, not given her a kiss, not even shed a single tear. Infact he didn't really seem bothered at all to be honest.

We've been arguing on and off for months, but non-stop at each others throats for the past few days. It's the same every Friday, he promises he's only off to the pub for a few drinks and he'll be home at 10. Then turns his phone off until he's knocking on the door at 4 in the morning barely able to hold himself upright. Then he spends the rest of the weekend in bed recovering, promises he'll never do it again, then does it all over again next weekend.

That wouldn't be so bad if he was even half a decent dad the rest of the time. But he refuses to hold her, even when shes fast asleep and hes doing nothing but watch tv, he refuses to change her nappy, he just refuses to do anything with/for her. Which just leads to more arguments in which I get told to shut up, or like this morning get punched in the head and threatened that he'll beat me up =\. I even have to get my mum to come round and watch her whilst I have a shower because that seems to be beyond him as well. His excuse is 'Well what would you do if you were on your own?' She's such a good little girl though, no trouble at all.

But turns out I'm the one in the wrong again He's just rung me to let me know that I'm apparantly going to really struggle by myself and If he was the kind of person who beats women up then Id already be knocked into next week and black and blue by now. Which was lovely to hear

Sorry for the rant and I don't expect anyone to have read this far. I'm just sat here crying and need to get it out. Looks like its just me and my gorgeous baby from now on. Shes deserves so much better than her scum of a father, she's better off without him.

Don't know what I want people to say really, just need to hear that it's all going to be ok

 

[nolansmom]

I read as far as you wrote..

Next time he calls act really annoyed to talk to him and tell him you're much too busy to carry on a chat with him. When he says insulting things; just laugh. Tell him how funny you think he is and how impossible it is to take him seriously at this point. Just explain you're a grown woman and don't have the patience or inclination for his little boy games.

It can be entertaining, trust me..

 

[Jslyn9996]

Oh my gosh! Horrible! you and your girl do not deserve that what so ever! Definitley sounds like she doesny need someone like that in her life. Sorry you have to go through this

 

[Rhio92]

You do not deserve that hun You and your daughter deserve so much better. Please don't get back with him!

 

[lemontree12]

Oh stay strong...

He sounds exactly like my ex, this was all before lo but every weekend would result in him going out to 6am then recovering all weekend, I absolutely hated my life, like you it would of been an issue if he made up for it during the week, he also punched me in the legs arms etc, but again didnt see the harm in it, he even done it at the start of my pregnancy because I was crying in the night (he had told me to leave that morning because he didn't want out baby) and me crying was stopping him sleep. My point is, from that moment I left the next day, to begin with it was with the hope he would see what he had lost but instead he had already got his next piece. I am literally on my own, no family here they live in Ireland no support from him or his family because he stuck to his word and has yet to met our 3month old daughter after 4yrs together.
It is so tough but I can promise you it get easier, now I am so happy in my life, I would much rather things now, than how they used to be, it took me along time to get there.
No one deserves to be treated like that let alone an innocent child. Stay strong this forum is amazing and has got me threw the worst days and has seen me threw.

Stay strong xxx

 

[emeraldbaby]

Yes, you and your precious baby girl are wayyyy better off without him. What sort of role model would he be to your daughter? He obviously doesn't care about being a father at all or even a responsible adult. He doesn't respect you either and to say what he did about beating you up is emotional abuse.

Make a clean start for yourself and your baby. You will both be fine, you don't need him. As far as his access to the baby is concerned, if he ever shows an interest remember to document everything, you will be glad you did.
*hugs*

 

[whatwillbe]

You would cope on your own hun, cos you do already from what you have said, if i was you i'd get rid ! He does nothing to help you, it doesnt sound like a relationship at all, and the violence will get worse, you dont deserve it and neither does your daughter, be strong hun, i hope you leave him x

 

[Jennifurball]

You poor thing. Well I am in exactly the same boat, except I left, but he left to live in Scotland without even coming to say goodbye to Scarlett, he called me upset on the phone but he was only round the corner. I didn't expect him to say anything to me. He also promised every week not to get pissed, but he did, then spent the whole weekend asleep or drinking more, did nothing for Scarlett apart from the odd nappy change. He also hit me too and his mates said he should have beat me up and shed my blood when I called the police on him for taking my car whilst drunk. Nice mates eh?

It will be hard at first but you have to be strong for your little girl and we are here for you whenever you need a cry/moan. We are both better off without. You will find it easier to look after her alone because you won't have his additional stress/mess, trust me, it is easier, especially when you did everything for her anyway.

 

[Dezireey]

Much better off without him Hun, definitely. I would be petrified that a man who hits me would hit my child when I'm not around, couldn't live like that. He sounds capable of anything. Protect your LO and yourself and leave him to his own selfish ways and be happy without him. You're little girl will completely understand one day and will be glad Mummy protected her from such a crap father.

Hugs xx