hot and cold about buying a pram.

[mummypeanut]

As some of your may remember my parents are not very supportive about our idea that we will baby wear when the baby is first born.

Mum wants to give us money towards a pram but we live in a very small terrace house and there seem to be a lot of practical postives to not rushing out and buying a travel system before the baby is born when we havent even been able to try baby wearing yet and we have no space for a pram and no idea how much we will end up using it.

My latest idea for compromise that i am considering is getting a car seat and a pram frame with a car seat connector as an 'imbetween' measure until we have decided what is best for us. One of my freinds says this wont work because new borns need to lie flat - anyone know why??

Any comments, ideas or opinions - is a baby car seat and pram frame sufficient as a starter kit? Should i just ignore parental opinion and go with what we want to try to start out - in some ways i would rather find out for myself its completely inpractical!

HELP this is causing so much stress!!!

 

[colsy]

Mum wants to give us money towards a pram but we live in a very small terrace house and there seem to be a lot of practical postives to not rushing out and buying a travel system before the baby is born when we havent even been able to try baby wearing yet and we have no space for a pram and no idea how much we will end up using it.

My latest idea for compromise that i am considering is getting a car seat and a pram frame with a car seat connector as an 'imbetween' measure until we have decided what is best for us. One of my freinds says this wont work because new borns need to lie flat - anyone know why??

Any comments, ideas or opinions - is a baby car seat and pram frame sufficient as a starter kit? Should i just ignore parental opinion and go with what we want to try to start out - in some ways i would rather find out for myself its completely inpractical!

A car seat is not a good place for your baby to spend a lot of time - if you check the manufacturer's instructions, almost all of them say that a baby should spend no more than two hours at a time in a car seat. This is because a baby, if it's lying down, should be flat on its back as this is the best position for its spine.

Baby-wearing/carrying is a different matter altogether, because the baby is upright rather than lying down.

I agree with you that finding out for yourself is the best way to go. There are zillions of different ways to bring up a child, and that includes how you transport the baby and where the baby sleeps. I don't want to sound harsh, and I certainly don't want to cause a rift between you and your parents, but in my opinion how you transport your baby is absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with your mum. I wonder how she would feel if you started telling her what sort of car she should drive, or what job she should apply for, or what she should eat for her tea tonight. Somehow, I am guessing she wouldn't take too kindly to being told what to do - just like nobody does.

So, as I said before when I answered a question on BnB re this sort of thing, do what YOU think is best for YOU, your partner and your baby. If baby-wearing is what you like the idea of, but then you decide it's not for you, then at least you'll have wasted only a small amount of money - better than spending heaps of money on a pram and then never using it.

Remember, pram shops, eBay and Freecycle will still exist once your baby is born. There's nothing to say you can't buy a pram after the big day.

I hope some of this makes sense. I should just say as a final point - your mum has probably only got your best interests at heart ... the problem is that sometimes what's right for mum isn't right for daughter ... I hope that she will come to understand that and that you're not fighting her just for the sake of it.

Good luck xx

 

[thelilbump]

I agree on the car seat thing, i remember an assistant in mothercare telling me about the time guides i had no idea before that. We got a reclining car seat from mamas and papas in the end. what about a smaller pram that goes from birth, the zia star is supposed to be quite good.

 

[mummypeanut]

Mum wants to give us money towards a pram but we live in a very small terrace house and there seem to be a lot of practical postives to not rushing out and buying a travel system before the baby is born when we havent even been able to try baby wearing yet and we have no space for a pram and no idea how much we will end up using it.

My latest idea for compromise that i am considering is getting a car seat and a pram frame with a car seat connector as an 'imbetween' measure until we have decided what is best for us. One of my freinds says this wont work because new borns need to lie flat - anyone know why??

Any comments, ideas or opinions - is a baby car seat and pram frame sufficient as a starter kit? Should i just ignore parental opinion and go with what we want to try to start out - in some ways i would rather find out for myself its completely inpractical!

A car seat is not a good place for your baby to spend a lot of time - if you check the manufacturer's instructions, almost all of them say that a baby should spend no more than two hours at a time in a car seat. This is because a baby, if it's lying down, should be flat on its back as this is the best position for its spine.

Baby-wearing/carrying is a different matter altogether, because the baby is upright rather than lying down.

I agree with you that finding out for yourself is the best way to go. There are zillions of different ways to bring up a child, and that includes how you transport the baby and where the baby sleeps. I don't want to sound harsh, and I certainly don't want to cause a rift between you and your parents, but in my opinion how you transport your baby is absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with your mum. I wonder how she would feel if you started telling her what sort of car she should drive, or what job she should apply for, or what she should eat for her tea tonight. Somehow, I am guessing she wouldn't take too kindly to being told what to do - just like nobody does.

So, as I said before when I answered a question on BnB re this sort of thing, do what YOU think is best for YOU, your partner and your baby. If baby-wearing is what you like the idea of, but then you decide it's not for you, then at least you'll have wasted only a small amount of money - better than spending heaps of money on a pram and then never using it.

Remember, pram shops, eBay and Freecycle will still exist once your baby is born. There's nothing to say you can't buy a pram after the big day.

I hope some of this makes sense. I should just say as a final point - your mum has probably only got your best interests at heart ... the problem is that sometimes what's right for mum isn't right for daughter ... I hope that she will come to understand that and that you're not fighting her just for the sake of it.

Good luck xx

thanks there is some extremely sound advice in there!!! I guess as all children feel (no matter how old they are) im scared of disagreeing with my mum! Its a hard one......time will tell how it works out D Thanks for taking the time to write such a good reply!

MP xxx

 

[lozzy21]

For newborns they recomend no more than 40 mins in one position. Its bad for there spine and joints and can just make them realy umcomfy. Just imadgine sitting in the same position for over an hour and not being able to move, you would be in agony.
As a comparmise, could you just not get a lightweight pushchair that can lay back? They fold down to next to nothing so can be stored easily. It can be used from birth.
Some thing like this?
https://www.mothercare.com/OBaby-At...ing=UTF8&m=A2LBKNDJ2KZUGQ&n=44333031&mcb=core

 

[Sherileigh]

Can I ask a dumb question then? How do you get your baby places if you don't have a car seat? (is this different than our car seats?). We have to have a car seat to leave the hospital. I walk a lot of places, but have to drive some as well. I like to wear him sometimes, and have him in the stroller (with car seat) sometimes as well. He's not very happy in a carrier yet, so I'm trying to get him used to it slowly.
But I agree it's totally your choice, none of your mom (or anyone else's) business. You do what's best for you guys!!

 

[colsy]

Can I ask a dumb question then? How do you get your baby places if you don't have a car seat? (is this different than our car seats?). We have to have a car seat to leave the hospital. I walk a lot of places, but have to drive some as well. I like to wear him sometimes, and have him in the stroller (with car seat) sometimes as well. He's not very happy in a carrier yet, so I'm trying to get him used to it slowly.
But I agree it's totally your choice, none of your mom (or anyone else's) business. You do what's best for you guys!!

Um, I don't think anyone has suggested not having a car seat (if you've got a car, that is). I don't know about anybody else's replies to the original question, but my point was that you shouldn't put your baby in the car seat for more than two hours at a time ... so that means on a journey of more than two hours, you should stop for a while and take your baby out of the car seat, and then carry on with your journey after a bit of a break.

I can't imagine British car seats are different from those in other countries (although I could be wrong), and like you it's definitely illegal to transport a baby in a car in the UK unless it's strapped in to a correctly fitted car seat.

x

 

[mummypeanut]

As a comparmise, could you just not get a lightweight pushchair that can lay back? They fold down to next to nothing so can be stored easily. It can be used from birth.
Some thing like this?
https://www.mothercare.com/OBaby-At...ing=UTF8&m=A2LBKNDJ2KZUGQ&n=44333031&mcb=core

fab suggestion!! I didnt even know these exsisted.... thanks for that link

 

[lozzy21]

No probs.

 

[CeliaM]

I found having a stroller that the car seat could be put into a huge help. The baby would often fall asleep as we drove, and waking him up to put him in a carrier was far less appealing that grabbing the stroller out of the trunk. Carrying the carseat on it's own was heavy, and difficult to do while carrying anything else.