How do you survive?

[RedWylder]

Well I feel as though I've graduated to this section of BnB. I'm nearing my 1 year mark and for those who've been trying far longer I apologize for being the whiny noob but I just don't see an end in sight and I just feel hopeless. I feel like every day I live trying to forget I'm not pregnant. How do you keep going?

 

[lupinerainbow]

Well its not easy but you get through it because you have to we have been trying for over 4 years now and i guess you get used to the idea that there isn't much chance of it happening. I dont really know what is worse if i think about it when you have first started and each cycle disappoints you or if you get to the stage where you know its not going to be your cycle and are just going along with the fertility specialist. You will survive this and i hope you get your BFP soon Sorry i didn't really answer the question

 

[RedWylder]

No you did and I appreciate your thoughts. You're right that it's hard to know what's worse. Some days I'd be glad to not feel dissappointed anymore. Right now I feel like I'm consumed by TTC and I hate it. On the other hand I guess it means that there is still hope for me and that in itself should be a small comfort.

 

[Mrs B.]

I just got to the point of being sure it wasn't going to happen (felt like that more and more once I got past a year) and now I really don't feel anything to the whole process. In the last few days before AF arrives I get a little excited the longer it is before the spotting starts, but that's it. I think I'm quite unusual though - I think it's almost a defence mechanism, like my body has shut down emotions to protect itself. Round about Feb this year I had an HSG test and that cycle I went back to my original 'very hopeful and emotional' state and it was awful when AF arrived. We're likely going to be starting IVF over the summer/autumn and I'm hoping I don't get my hopes up too much. The one thing that really gets me is when I imagine never being able to have my own children - that sucks. But I just don't know what's going to happen - so many people on here that have been LTTTC do end up with kids so I just have to keep my fingers crossed that we'll all get there eventually.

Sorry for the ramble. I guess what I'm trying to say was it got less stressful for me as time went on (and I'm only at just short of 2 years which is nothing compared to a lot of people on here) but each person will deal with it in their own way. Keep focussing on the positives and remember that most people do get pregnant in the end - it just takes a little longer for some than others. GL!

 

[amy8686]

Welcome (unfortunately) to the LTTC section!

Since you're just coming into the one-year mark, have you been to a specialist? That went a long way toward helping me keep going. Instead of just feeling hopeless, we're at least now doing productive things to try to figure out what's wrong and overcome it.

Beyond that, I try to cope by enjoying the things that will go away once we have kids... at some point, I'll look back fondly to the time when I could spend my free time however I wanted, and my husband and I could go on dates on a whim, and I could maintain a clean and clutter-free home with ease.

Good luck to you!

 

[RedWylder]

I have not yet been to a specialist unless you count my OB. He put me on clomid but then that made me STOP ovulating so I'm sort of ticked off. My husband is having a semen analysis soon so I'm hoping that will come in good. But for now I think I've done as much as I'm willing to until I get even more desperate. My insurance doesn't pay for anything fertility so I'm holding off as long as possible.