How to cope with possible seperation...

[Lotti1978]

Hubby and I have been having difficulties for 4 years.....

Good times and bad....we are best mates and get on well but I woke up one day no longer in love with him...I love him like a friend...we discussed it and said we would see...
It got a little better or maybe it was in my mind and then we had a miscarriage....things got very much worse and then a bit better and we tried again....lots better actually it was a weekend away and our wedding anniversary...we conceived our daughter....
Ive not wanted to sleep with hubby for years and I also discussed this...he remained patient...when I got pg I knew it was the perfect excuse to avoid sex and intimacy....

Its a long story really...........I just want to know how to cope with single parenthood if it happens...we are at our limits again now...rowing and unhappy..... I want to seperate to give us space but our little girl is 16m old and very clingy....

How would it work????

XXXX

 

[lemontree12]

I'm sorry I won't be much help in this situation but, mayb if you are feeling so unhappy that's the only choice left! Who know u may decide that you miss eachother greatly and want to try again.

I hope everything works out for you xx

 

[teal]

I don't mean to sound harsh but you cope because you have to.

Whatever happens you'll cope for you and your LO xx

 

[jemmie1994]

^WSS you adjust to it
i was lucky in that my daughter is too young to notice daddy isnt around anymore but if your so unhappy can bet your little girl will pick up on it if your marriage is beyond fixing you will both be better off calling it a day imo anyway granted i dont have any experience of marriage

 

[Shezza84uk]

You will cope but have you ever considered marriage counselling? I mean before separating your family it's worth trying everything before making a firm decision as this will be something to live with all your life and it might affect your LO when she asks.. At least when she is older you will have the peace of mind to know you really tried to make it work! good luck and I hope whatever decision you make you will be happier for it x

 

[Laura2919]

I'm sorry your going through this.

It can be as easy or as difficult as you make it really. It's all down to you and your husband. The first thing I arranged when FOB and I split was the girls care, He would have them on his day off during the week and every other weekend. He said this was fine, now however the girls go to nursery so he only has them every other weekend. He's happy with this, he pays his maintenance through CSA as we had a to do over money but now all is good. I dislike his every being and he dislikes mine too lol.. Its amazing how we stayed together because I didn't love him and although he says he loved me I know deep down he only thought he did.

You have to do whats best for you. You cannot stay somewhere your not happy and you cannot ignore it because it wont go away it will only continue to grow and why lose what you have? If you can come out of this as friends then why not while you have something to save??

I'd love it if one day FOB and I can be friends, for my girls really because they deserve to grow up with parents who can at least talk to each other which right now I cant do because they come second to his new wonderful life... Maybe who knows??

Salvage what you can before it all turns to nothing..