How to tell parents we're pregnant? Worried

[SugarFairy]

At the moment I quite like that my bean is my secret but I am going to have to tell my parents soon as I carry 20kg sacks of dog food for them - just between the car and their house - and obviously I can't do this now. This is our 2nd pregnancy - they didn't know about the first - and neither did I til it wasn't there anymore to be honest. DH has told his Mum who told his Dad but I just don't know how to say it. It still doesn't feel real for me yet and I'm not sure I'm ready to share - especially if something bad happens again. Its not that I'm not close to my parents, its just that we don't have that openly talking about sexual stuff/personal problems kind of relationship. Am I going to be able to say it without crying? (I'm very emotional at the moment) and do I tell them the last one didn't stick? Is the prevoius mc going to come up in midwife appointments or in scans that my mum might attend later on in the pregnancy? I'm just worried that if I don't tell her she might find out and wonder why I didn't go to her for support......
What are you guys doing? Have you told parents yet?

 

[kanga]

hi hun, we haven't told our folks yet. We just want to get past the first early scan. I feel telling people might jinx it!

If I were in your shoes, I would probably hold off for a few weeks. And when you do tell her, i would come clean about the mc just so she can be there for you this time. x

 

[hb1]

I told my parents about our first pg when we went round for my b-day tea the day ( sunday ) before my b-day - 2 days later we were calling them to say we were going for a scan as were possibly miscarrying so they knew about our loss - I also asked my mum to tell my other family members so I didn't have to go through saying the same thing over and over and being upset - also as we were seeing everyone at Christmas and it was still quite raw it meant that if I were upset then people would understand. This time I told them the day after we found out we were pg - partly as my mum was a great source of support during my previoous mc and if something were to go wrong I would need that support again.

Whether you tell them or not depends so much on your relationship with your parents - for me I felt better them knowing - I also told my manager at work straight away and people I worked closely with - knowing I would be emotional and worried, the fact that people knew what had happened before and what I was going though then was a relief for me - no more explaining whatever happened.

Hope whatever you decide you get the right support - particularly during these early days when you're going to feel v worried and v emotional.

hx

 

[louisechippy]

hey hun jumping over from 3rd tri x i didnt tell my mum about my miscarrige she came to my booking in appointment with my midwife i didnt think it would come up but it did.. they like to know about all previous pregnancys that ended with a live birth or a miscarrige x x

 

[Pippin]

I'm almost the opposite, I told my Mum with my son instantly I saw her, then with the one I lost I waited weeks and then lost it, this time I didn't want to jinx it so the night I got an obvious positive I got on skype and showed them the test. I understand not wanting to jinx it but I was so glad of her support when I lost the last one, she was my rock. Help me see the bigger picture and get over it better. We are all different though. Maybe say you've done your back in or something?

 

[foxforce]

My parents were first to know same day I found out, quite close to my parents plus my mum would know she kinda knew before I said anything!
Also I would need their support if anything were to go wrong aswell as support if all goes well

 

[SugarFairy]

Thanks for all your replies.
I think I am going to tell them. When my brother and S-I-L lost their baby I know my Mum did little things for them so they could grieve in their own time, even if it was just making an extra lasagne and taking it down to them so they didn't have to think about cooking.
Its just that I'm really really bad at this kind of thing. I get overly emotional - the type where you can't speak - and thats when I'm NOT pregnant. I'll have to wait til I'm feeling particularly cheery and phone them quick right then! I'm only 4 + 2 and I'm such a mess already. I haven't been able to read the news since Thursday because it makes me well up!
Thanks again all x

 

[foxforce]

I told mine in person but I was very nervous each time didn't quite know how to come out with it! This time my dh just said 'anyway Claire's got something to tell you....' and mum guessed then!
It is very emotional. I get a call or a txt each day to check how things are bless em oh and home made soup today when they came over

All the best with it xx

 

[aussiettc]

I'm 30 and having my 4th after 2 MC this year. I'm so worried bout telling my parent and DH's parents as i'm not sure they will think its a good idea. We plan to tell them in December when we are visiting. But that all depends on how the scan goes tomorrow. Its funny that something so simple can become so complicated isn't it.

 

[WifeyS]

Im not telling ours yet. I feel really bad for not telling them and I kind of think my mum might feel a bit hurt about it but I just dont want anyone getting excited yet!

My husbands parents are soooo excited everytime we get pregnant, and so is my mum.
Thy call every day and ask questions bless them. Also for myself its nice in a way just to talk to my husband about the pregnancy as I feel the more people know about it, the more i end up talking about it and the more excited I get!!!

This way I feel like im not really pregnant so hopefully if something does go wrong, I wont feel as upset???????

Hope that makes sense in a mad way lol xxx

 

[marnie79]

Aww hun, congrats and goodluck, if u are finding emotions difficult at the mo could ur OH not tell them so its easier for u ? Really hope all goes well xx

 

[SugarFairy]

Thanks everyone
I did tell them at 5 weeks. Couldn't really keep it from them. I sobbed..... but so did my Mum so its ok, and I came clean about my mc in August so its all out there. Nothing hidden now and I feel much better