How to wean an older child?

[c1403]

Hi All

DD2 will be two in September and I think I want our breastfeeding journey to end or at least reduce.
She loves milk but only mine. I'd say she nurses between 3-5 times a day and still wakes 1-2 times during the night (has never Sttn)
I wonder the best way of reducing her feeds, she normally wants milk when tired or upset and needs it to fall back to sleep....all habits I should have tackled earlier but what with an older DD it was just easier to give her the breast.
She doesn't seem to ask for it when out but short of staying out the house all day I'm not sure where to start.

I didn't feed DD1 so making it to two years is a major achievement but I'd kind of like my body back now.

Thanks for any tips, ideas and experiences.

C

 

[noon_child]

There is a a 5 step programme that I quite like. It is based on the idea that we don't refuse a request to bf but we try things to make these requests less frequent or less desirable. You don't do all the steps at once, you can go at your own pace, but whatever step you are on try to remember to do all the previous steps too!

Step 1 is where you plan what you can do together that is loving and close but not breastfeeding (eg story time on your lap, painting each other's nails, tickle fights whatever is natural for you) It recognises that pulling away from your child emotionally and physically makes weaning HARDER.
Step 2 is anticipate - offer your LO a snack or drink or cuddle before she gets to the point of asking for a bf
Step 3 is alternatives - so you missed the above and the child has asked to feed, you say yes but would you like X instead?
Step 4 is delay - you've tried steps 2 and 3 but LO still wants boob, so you say yes you can have a feed but AFTER my cup of tea, or at nap time, or when we get to the cafe etc.
Step 5 is time limit. So steps 1-4 are all happening but now if you still have to give a feed, you say,"just a 5minute one" etc.

You choose, based on your LOs reaction, when to move from each step to the next.

You can choose to do this for all feeds, or just those which you find annoying (e.g you could keep the bedtime feed as normal if you enjoy it and its the easiest way of getting her to sleep).

My milk supply stayed matched with her demand based on only two feeds a day, but once this dropped to one feed my milk supply started dropping and within a month or two she couldn't get much out and declared my breasts were "broken" and that was the end of breastfeeding.

 

[c1403]

Great tips. We have tried some of these but not consistently.
Thank You

 

[Jencocoa]

Great ideas!! I am trying to wean 28 month old. Also doesn't sttn.

 

[ElsMommy26]

I was also worried about this with my first, but I made the decision at 15 months that it was time to ween, for the sole reason that she would wake up at night every hour on the hour to nurse. It wasn't that she was hungry, but it was a habit, just to soothe her, and I knew we both deserved a good night sleep.

One of the best things about weening an older child (especially a two year old) is that they understand (or at least accept) if something is no more.

The first time my daughter awoke at night, I told her "there is no more milk" and pointed to my breasts. Instead, I rocked her back to sleep. She didn't wake up the rest of the night. The second night, we did the same thing. And that was literally all it took. 2 nights. And she was weened. Now, I was not one to "ween only at night" and then go back at it during the day. I felt that my message had to be consistent, that there was no more milk to be had, day or night. We both began to get some much needed sleep! Much less stress than I originally had anticipated.

 

[Jencocoa]

I was also worried about this with my first, but I made the decision at 15 months that it was time to ween, for the sole reason that she would wake up at night every hour on the hour to nurse. It wasn't that she was hungry, but it was a habit, just to soothe her, and I knew we both deserved a good night sleep.

One of the best things about weening an older child (especially a two year old) is that they understand (or at least accept) if something is no more.

The first time my daughter awoke at night, I told her "there is no more milk" and pointed to my breasts. Instead, I rocked her back to sleep. She didn't wake up the rest of the night. The second night, we did the same thing. And that was literally all it took. 2 nights. And she was weened. Now, I was not one to "ween only at night" and then go back at it during the day. I felt that my message had to be consistent, that there was no more milk to be had, day or night. We both began to get some much needed sleep! Much less stress than I originally had anticipated.

That's awesome! I think that you were quite lucky to LOL. I have tried that with my daughter and that girl carries on his of her world is ending and tries to rip my shirt off and bangs her head against my breasts and carries on and on and on. I work full-time so I think she wants to bonding and closeness. I know I'm just going to have to tough it out coming here soon. I'm just so very very tired that I haven't been up for the battle and struggle. With the job and the three kids and my son's autism I'm depleted at night.