How would you feed future kiddies?

[mrsbeano]

For whatever reason lots of ladies FF their LOs. Would you try to BF any future babies or just go straight for formula?

I don't even know why I'm thinking about it really but I'm totally unsure. At the time I was more than happy to throw the towel in because I was exhausted and LO was feeding hourly but 20/20 hindsight tells me that I should have seen an LC. That said he is fine on formula and it also has huge positives.

 

[dizz]

I'm mixed on it (and have a few months left to make the decision) - there's no way I'll put myself under the stress and pressure I was under last time, and there's no way I'm going down the exclusive pumping route if she won't latch.

What I'm currently telling myself is if I have another preemie in the same situation who ends up in NICU - I'll pump as much as I can until we're out of the hospital but bottle feed the expressed milk (I'm not extending our stay in transitional care for weeks on end to go home breastfeeding and leaving my other child at home mummyless for that long) and then transition to formula at home... if the delivery is straightforward and full-term and we can get a successful latch I'll consider breastfeeding, but if I'm feeling at all mentally wobbly and unhappy - I'm going straight down the formula route - and I'm putting it on my birth plan that I don't expect to be pressurised into any particular course of action (if anything I'll put it down that I'll be formula feeding to keep the pressure completely off - they tend to adopt an ignore you completely policy if you're not breastfeeding round here).

I also do not want my breasts man-and-womanhandled with the lack of consideration and respect that they were last time - sorry but it's only polite that you ASK me before you grab my norks and start lobbing them around - you'd expect me to do the same to yours!

I have to say the behaviour of particularly some of the internet keyboard warriors (and the odd busy body in the street) regarding bullying bottle-feeding mothers makes me LESS inclined to breastfeed though.

 

[BeachyBronzer]

im not sure.
i think it depends on how the birth goes. if i have another traumatic labour followed by an emcs which was awful and i was in icu afterwards for two days, i think i would ff.
inwas so intent on bfing, which i did, for two weeks, but it delayed my recovery, and i got depressed, and had all kinds of issues.
in hind sight i should have not bothered to try so hard to bf.
but if i had an easy labour and baba just falls out then i might be more inclined to try bf again.

although i would probably bf for a couple days combined with ff. i definitly would not be too pushed to make it work.

 

[katy1310]

I am hoping to BF if we have another one....Sophie was born 13 weeks early, and I did manage to BF her till she was 5 months - expressed milk via NG tube for the first 9 weeks, then she latched after that - but I gave up because I was so scared that she wasn't getting enough milk and she was so very tiny.

I *think* next time round, I'd feel braver, but you just can't be sure till you're there, can you? Whatever happens, I will try BF but I won't get myself stressed out if it doesn't work. I stressed too much about it last time and although it's best for the baby etc, it's not the be all and end all. I think I will just wait and see how things go. xx

 

[Twinkie210]

I FF DS #1 and I started off BFing DS #2 then switched to to EPing because of latch/weight gain issues. If we have a third I would probably try BFing again. I think I will talk more to a LC and take a class or two.

 

[mrsf1234]

As with LO my aim is to bf, but I wouldn't beat myself up about switching to formula if it didn't work.
My LO is the happiest and touch wood, healthiest baby ever and I regret wasting so much time being worried about switching to ff and then wasting more time feeling guilty after I did. I now know I did what was right at the time for my baby, so thats what I would do differently.

 

[Bunnikins]

Ff. I loved bf my girl but it took up too much time. I had days where she was literally permanently attached for 3,4,5 hours... I dunno how that would work with having another.

 

[Saphira]

I'm keeping an open mind but realistically even if BFing worked out this time, I don't see how I'd manage it with a 13 month old who would like my attention sometimes too. After hearing of many women on the couch for hours at a time BFing I don't see it happening. I'm also emotionally scarred from my first BFing experience, which is fresh in my memory. I won't set the bar so high for myself again to feel sadness about not giving my child "best" for months down the road. Because, you know, the best for us just may end up being formula, and so be it. I will give it a go straight after she's born and for the first day or two but then I'd like to pump. My husband will be on a paternity leave for two months, which will make pumping every 3hrs. possible. That way she will get some breastmilk, as did my first daughter for a few weeks, and we'll see how it goes with pumping. No pressure this time. I want to enjoy my daughters to the fullest without being brought down by the outside about how they're fed.

 

[mrsbeano]

I'm keeping an open mind but realistically even if BFing worked out this time, I don't see how I'd manage it with a 13 month old who would like my attention sometimes too. After hearing of many women on the couch for hours at a time BFing I don't see it happening. I'm also emotionally scarred from my first BFing experience, which is fresh in my memory. I won't set the bar so high for myself again to feel sadness about not giving my child "best" for months down the road. Because, you know, the best for us just may end up being formula, and so be it. I will give it a go straight after she's born and for the first day or two but then I'd like to pump. My husband will be on a paternity leave for two months, which will make pumping every 3hrs. possible. That way she will get some breastmilk, as did my first daughter for a few weeks, and we'll see how it goes with pumping. No pressure this time. I want to enjoy my daughters to the fullest without being brought down by the outside about how they're fed.

That's a great attitude to have. Congrats on your pregnancy

 

[OmarsMum]

I didn't have milk to BF, not sure about the reasons as it's not so common. I ended up with a traumatic EMCS, & I have PCOS. I didn't have a drop of milk & was so stressed out & dissapointed when I couldn't BF.

Next time I really hope I have a better birth experience, I will give BFing a try, but if it doesn't work, I will move to formula with no guilt.

I was worried about bonding as I couldn't bond for 2 months, but it was fine later. In fact I have an amazing bond with my son, he's still in my bed, he runs to me for cuddles all day, & he's very affectionate.

 

[cat lover]

I am in the situation now and combifeed, its the best of both worlds. LO still gets BM butit means I am not stuck permanently to the sofa (although still a fair bit of the time!) the decision was largely based on her lack of weight gain but also because I want to spend time with my 18 month old

 

[Saphira]

That's a great attitude to have. Congrats on your pregnancy

Thanks

 

[aliss]

Bf for sure.

My first was formula fed (he had severe GERD "acid reflux"), plus a whole bunch of other problems (ie broken collarbone at birth made latching impossible, vomiting everything I pumped).

My second latched straight away and aside from the normal exhausting cluster feeds, he has breastfed really well and has none of the same struggles as his brother. I find BF to actually be much easier (I can just hold him on the tit and walk around with my toddler at playgroups).

I was blessed that my 2nd made it easy, I have no idea what I would have done in the same circumstance as #1.

If I ever have a #3 (and that will be one huge oopsy b/c I am done), I would still BF.

 

[kerrie24]

I would bf unless there was some reason I couldnt,then I would have no qualms using formula.

The mums who say they neec to ff in order nto spend time with their toddler,do you mean you will be getting other people to give the formula to your baby?
Otherwise I dont understand what the difference is to be honest.
Not everyone is stuck on the sofa for 4 hours bf,in fact ive never met anyone who is.

I ebf my lo even when I had to take the kids to school at 9,go back to nursery at 11.30 for dd and then to school for ds1 at 3.15.Lo never went hungry nor was I ever neglectfull of my other kids.It can be done,if you want to.

My niece who is ff has stayed with me a few times and I find it a lot more stressfull to ff with a toddler running around,baby has to wait for milk to be made/heated then you need 2 hands to feed bottle.With bf you have a free hand to read/play/cuddle your toddler with.

 

[aliss]

^Agreed Kerrie, meet the baby first before deciding you'll be stuck to a sofa all day. My 2nd has never breast fed more than 10 minutes straight. I find it a lot easier to walk around with him on the boob and still play with my toddler rather than sit and use a bottle.

 

[kerrie24]

same aliss.

It really is a shame that I feel like Im going to be attacked if I stick up for bf,but of course most of the women in the ff section are unfortunately going to have a bad veiw of bf which is sad.It can be a lovely experience.

 

[cat lover]

in my case i HAVE met the baby though lol and am bf her right now as i type. i really envy thosr who are able to bf quickly but unfortunately mine wants to feed alk the time as did dd1. kerrie i wouldnt have been able to do your schedule without dd2 going hungry but if she was a less frequent feeder and had gained weight ok i would ebf. it rakes ten minsto give her a bittle but forever to bf her, thstswhat i meant in my post xx ps sorry for typos

 

[cat lover]

just to add i am very pro bf and mainly bf my lo. live and let live, bf or ff we are all feeding our babies and thats all that really matters x

 

[sg2011]

I will breast feed for a short time to share that experience with the next LO but then he/she will be on formula because I will need to go back on meds for a health condition. I wanted that experience with dd but circumstances surrounding her birth didn't allow. Even though it can never be long term I still want to have that experience and really felt upset about missing it the first time around.

 

[Kage76]

this ones a real hard one for me. I so badly wanted to breastfeed when it all imploded it really left some nasty scars. Im scared to breastfeed my next one... almost. I will settle for i'll try to - if it isn't working for any reason at all- i will switch at the first signs of pushing myself too hard.

i dont want to ever go back to that dark place.