I can't stop

[LegoHouse]

My daughter stopped BFing at 14 months. I encouraged it slightly, I stopped feeding her to sleep and she stopped feeding completely. I just can't seem to stop this time, or even encourage it. My son is a lot different to my daughter. She was a rough sleeper, and whilst my son wakes up as many, if not more times a night; he is much more settled and goes back to sleep. Whereas, until we stopped BFing my daughter would not sleep at all. She would cry all night. It was horrible. Then there's my boy, who isn't doing anything wrong at all. He feeds when he wants to. He is happy. I just don't want to upset him. I don't want to ruin this happy, independent, super intelligent little boy. I mean, my daughter was always high needs, she was always upset, whether she was BF or cuddled to sleep, she wasn't going down easy. She was super clever, and beautiful, and strong willed, but she was not content with BF. She needed some structure. My son is so comforted by breastfeeding. But once every couple of weeks, I'm feeling that feeling where you've had enough, and you'd quite like your body and your bed back. I know not everyone gets that feeling, but I am feeling it. And I'm wondering if I go with that occasional feeling and stop, or wait until it is a constant feeling like it was with my daughter. Is it bad to feed him for longer? Or is it OK to accept that they have different needs?

I guess the bottom line of this thread is, do I stop because occasionally I feel "touched out" and irritated by BFing, or do I wait until I feel like that all of the time? And is it weird to not want to upset him? And to fear that upsetting him like that, may change who he is?

*ssssssssssigh* I don't know. I am feeling so conflicted.

 

[LegoHouse]

If I really wanted to stop I wouldn't even be questioning it would I?

 

[SarahBear]

My daughter stopped BFing at 14 months. I encouraged it slightly, I stopped feeding her to sleep and she stopped feeding completely. I just can't seem to stop this time, or even encourage it. My son is a lot different to my daughter. She was a rough sleeper, and whilst my son wakes up as many, if not more times a night; he is much more settled and goes back to sleep. Whereas, until we stopped BFing my daughter would not sleep at all. She would cry all night. It was horrible. Then there's my boy, who isn't doing anything wrong at all. He feeds when he wants to. He is happy. I just don't want to upset him. I don't want to ruin this happy, independent, super intelligent little boy. I mean, my daughter was always high needs, she was always upset, whether she was BF or cuddled to sleep, she wasn't going down easy. She was super clever, and beautiful, and strong willed, but she was not content with BF. She needed some structure. My son is so comforted by breastfeeding. But once every couple of weeks, I'm feeling that feeling where you've had enough, and you'd quite like your body and your bed back. I know not everyone gets that feeling, but I am feeling it. And I'm wondering if I go with that occasional feeling and stop, or wait until it is a constant feeling like it was with my daughter. Is it bad to feed him for longer? Or is it OK to accept that they have different needs?

I guess the bottom line of this thread is, do I stop because occasionally I feel "touched out" and irritated by BFing, or do I wait until I feel like that all of the time? And is it weird to not want to upset him? And to fear that upsetting him like that, may change who he is?

*ssssssssssigh* I don't know. I am feeling so conflicted.

Since it's always best if you can continue, I say keep it up until you're not conflicted about it and stopping seems clear.

 

[NoodleSnack]

Yeah, I don't think you really want to stop yet, and that's completely fine, don't let anyone make you feel it isn't, but since you brought up your daughter, I'm wondering if maybe you're feeling guilty about stopping with your daughter and thinking it's unfair if you feed your son for longer? Even when bf was really rough I knew I would bf my next baby because I wouldn't bf this one and not the other, I would feel too guilty, so that's why I'm wondering if you're feeling the same way with regards to duration? I think it's better that you continue since you both enjoy it most of the time, and when the urge to stop gets stronger you will come to a point where you would want to stop more than continue.