i dont know what is right

[Becki77]

Hey,
This is a tough one! Im just going to tell you a little story which happened to me which may put things into perspective for you!
At the age of 16 i had been with my boyfriend for 2 years, i was studing for my gcse's and had all intention of staying on at school and going to university.......Then i found out i was pregnant ( approx 6 weeks) i never told the babys dad and we actually spilt up because i couldnt stand the sight of him knowing what we had done.( i blammed him although it was both our faults for making me pregnant!)
I had a very good relationship with my mum and the only person i knew would support me would be her, i was terrified telling her and thought she would go mad when actually all she did was cried and told me i was a silly girl! ( that didnt make me feel very good!) She offered to bring the baby up for me so i could still go to uni etc however i decided it was not the right time to have a baby and i would have a termination. By this time i had told the babys father and he was devestated at what i was going to do but i NEVER gave him a choice as i knew it would be me bringing up the baby for the next 18 years!
The hospital made me wait until i was 12 weeks to have a termination, by this time you have begun to be attached to the baby.
Some years later i got married and both my husband and i decided it was time for a family.......then the problems started! I was not able to concieve and tests that i had done proved it was a lasting result of the termination that i had. Some years later i have finally become pregnant which came as a huge shock as we were not actually planning it at this time!!!! We accepted the fact we couldnt have children.
To round this up i would never judge anyone who has a termination but please think of the lasting affects this may have on you later on in life. Because of my stupid mistake i almost never got to have children.
Maybe this is your only chance, good luck in whatever you decide, take care xx
p.s talk to your mum she may surprise you!!

 

[maddiwatts19]

Hey hunni

Bless you! Its horrible your having to go through this, when this should be the most special time of your life...
I was 19 when i fell pregnant first time, and i didnt know i was pregnant unitll i miscarried at 5 weeks. Then i fell pregnant again, and both me and my OH were both totally shocked and so scared. I always told him that i wouldnt have the baby if he didnt want it, because we have no intention of breaking up and its not right for the baby to be unwanted by its father. He said he wanted me to have an abortion, and reluctantly i agreed. However, after sitting him down and working out that we could have the baby, we decided we would. Obviously we were both scared because its our first, and you have no clue what to do. Unfortunately, this pregnancy has also ended in miscarriage at 12 weeks.
Maybe your boyfriend needs some time, to just get his head round things.

Good luck in your decision hun

xxxxx

 

[ella170]

Hey hunni

Bless you! Its horrible your having to go through this, when this should be the most special time of your life...
I was 19 when i fell pregnant first time, and i didnt know i was pregnant unitll i miscarried at 5 weeks. Then i fell pregnant again, and both me and my OH were both totally shocked and so scared. I always told him that i wouldnt have the baby if he didnt want it, because we have no intention of breaking up and its not right for the baby to be unwanted by its father. He said he wanted me to have an abortion, and reluctantly i agreed. However, after sitting him down and working out that we could have the baby, we decided we would. Obviously we were both scared because its our first, and you have no clue what to do. Unfortunately, this pregnancy has also ended in miscarriage at 12 weeks.
Maybe your boyfriend needs some time, to just get his head round things.

Good luck in your decision hun

xxxxx

im really sorry for ur loss, u didnt deserve that at all.
im gonna make my final 100% decision within the next few days after ive sat down with my bf, like u did, and tell him that its possible for us to have the baby.
thank u so much and everyone else aswell for their posts, its really going to help me to make a decision.
becky was right, this could be my only chance. u can regret an abortion for the rest of ur life, but i dont think anyone could regret having their child.
xx

 

[nikky0907]

im gonna make my final 100% decision within the next few days after ive sat down with my bf, like u did, and tell him that its possible for us to have the baby.
thank u so much and everyone else aswell for their posts, its really going to help me to make a decision.
becky was right, this could be my only chance. u can regret an abortion for the rest of ur life, but i dont think anyone could regret having their child.
xx

I was wondering when we'll hear from you...
It's good you're handling this in such a mature way...
I hope the talk with your bf goes well and you two make a decision that's best for you...

 

[Rumpskin]

Good luck sweety. xxx

 

[Becki77]

Bless you, your very mature! Im sure everything will be just fine, when your boyfriend has accepted it he'll become excited!!!
I wish you all the luck in the world telling both your parents it can be very scary, best wishes keep us updated, take care xx

 

[TashaAndBump]

u can regret an abortion for the rest of ur life, but i dont think anyone could regret having their child.
xx

That's very touching. You're clearly a mature and capable young woman - I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you.

 

[x-amy-x]

good luck ella... let us know what you decide

 

[vicky9207]

gud luk hun

 

[xclairex]

good luck darlin xx

 

[Becki77]

Hi Ella Just wandered when we were going to hear from you again?! x

 

[ella170]

well the gp wants me to tell him my final decision 2mra so i have to have a final think about it tonite! so ill let u know 2mra x

 

[nikky0907]

wow,thats some pressure!
I wish you a nice and wise night and I hope you make the right decision.
Please update!
xxx

 

[vicky9207]

hope u made the rite desion 2. keep us updated

 

[darkheaven]

if it helps hunny i was 16 when i got pregnant my partner then was a bit of a knob but i got pregnant because i was ready for kids and yes it was hard but i coped and had family support my daughter is now 13 so be sure of what u want for you not any one else and dont let no one make you feel guilty

 

[ella170]

well after all these weeks i finally made my FINAL decision
i told the GP that im keepin it.
im soooo fucked..this lil one better be worth it!
x

 

[vicky9207]

so i take it ur keepin the baby have u told ur parents yet?

 

[ella170]

no not yet. im gonna ring my aunt 2mra and tell her instead cos shes so easy to talk to and she will be able to help me with it.
im just as worried about my bfs mum findin out!

 

[vicky9207]

well she is gonna find out. be4 i told my parent tis is wat i thought "there going 2 find out sometime so ur better they them as some as u can" if tats any help. i find tat ders nothing any1 can say 2 help ya u just need 2 be brave n tell ur parents

 

[ella170]

but if i do it now then my mum might try n force me to have an abortion, where as if i leave it a few more weeks then she cnt reli say much cos its safer to have an abortion under 12 weeks
ALSO im so scared of havin a m/c in the next few weeks and goin through the whole process of tellin them when there ends up being no baby if u know what i mean?