I feel like my heart could break

[sparkle_1979]

oh that's terrible. Shame on the mother, if she doesn't know her daughter did this she should have made it her business to make sure this sort of thing does not happen. I'd have a word with her and explain in a calm way how hurt your son is and also have a word with the teacher x

 

[WW1]

I've only just read this and it has brought tears to my eyes. Children can be so cruel. I really hope her mum genuinely knew nothing about it because if she did I would be truly horrified.

I hope you were able to resolve the situation and your child isn't too upset by it all.

I wish there was a magic wand we could wave to make everything better

 

[angelstardust]

I would have a word with the school first. Not as a cop out, but if you have a good school then they should be able to communicate to all parents that inclusion is a large part of school life. They can also make a point of having a day where they go through inclusion with the class. And they can speak to the parents of the girl to say that your son was very upset at what happened and the the school does not encourage discrimination of any kind (it is discrimination after all). As the school are doing it and it's not coming from you, the parents are less likely to become defensive (oh my daughter would never do that!) and more likely to listen. If they don't well sod em they aint worth it!

Have you ever had a party for your son? Perhaps for his birthday you could hire a hall, put on some food and invite his whole class. Then they should see that really he doesn't have 3 heads. I know it's expensive but it is worth doing.

 

[nkbapbt]

Wow this thread, really breaks my heart.

I totally agree that you should speak to either the school or the girl's mother. I would really speak to the mom either way, because honestly? I would be curious if this behavior was not coming from her parents. I hate to say this, but a lot of the time this type of behavior and judgment is learned. And why didn't her parents make her invite him, when every one else was invited?

It just doesn't add up to me.

And if it's coming down from the parents, well then school needs to know for sure.

I am so sorry this has happened to your son. I really cannot believe any one could be so cruel.

 

[Kayleigh_x]

That's awful!
My sister has special needs, she's almost 21 now but developmentally she's around 8 and unfortunatally there were a lot of these hateful little swines around when we were growing up. There's only 10 months between us so we were in the same class and it's heartbreaking. But now she's in college, and like the leader in her little gang of friends! She's like the queen bee! She used to be so quiet and withdrawn, but being with people like her has really brought her out of her shell, and I bet your son will be the same! All the best!

 

[JaydensMommy1]

It makes you wonder how her parents are as people if they raised a child that can act this way. I know my son is only 3 but he plays with every child he is encounter with. One of his "best friends" has spina bifida and they play for hours. Children should be like this. I am sorry for your experience and for your son.

 

[Lucy22]

How heartbreaking, I'm so upset for you and your son

I think you really need to inform that spiteful little brat's mother what a bad job she did raising her child. Seriously, thats kind of behavior disgusts me. Leaving a child out like that is hurtful, and shows bullying traits. Your poor son Feel better in knowing he really doesn't need people like that witch in his life.

Maybe I'm over reacting but that really hit a nerve. Its basic manners and courtesy and parents just aren't teaching their kids that its important to be kind. There are some little girls in Elena's preschool that she wouldn't be too friendly with, but she knows full well that when her birthday comes round, she either invites everyone, or has no party.
Elena's two best friends are her cousins, my nephew and niece. One has a grade 5 reflux in her kidney, the other suffers from Horners syndrome and Cerebral Palsy. To her, they are her best friends and her family. She is innocent and thats how she sees them. I'm saddened that other children don't have this innocence.

I'd be sickened this happened to my own daughter, I can't imagine how you must feel.

Definitely inform her mother - I hope you get some satisfaction from her. You and your son will be in my thoughts over the coming days. Keep us updated xx

 

[BrandiCanucks]

So I know this thread is old, but I wanted to say that I hope your son had a good Boys Night Out.

We experienced something similar about a year ago. My now 4 year old daughter has special needs. She has microcephaly, complex partial seizures and an undiagnosed genetic condition. Her overall development is that of a 2 year old. Developmentally, she's behind her 2.5 year old brother.

We attend a playgroup and I sent out invitations for her third birthday party. It's so difficult because I plan her birthday parties around her developmental age and not chronological age. What other kids her age might be able to enjoy and do, she does not because she's not there yet. So, I booked two hours at an indoor playground thinking that was the perfect "inbetween".

Of 15 kids invited, only three responded. Two of them said they weren't coming. 12 kids ignored the invitation.

My heart broke. It felt worse for me than it did for my daughter. She didn't understand, thankfully, and I dread the day that she wants to have a birthday party and can understand it when kids don't respond or don't show up. I don't want to have to face the questions.

I didn't care that I was out $300 for a cake and private booking of a playground and couldn't get my money back. I was heartbroken that this was a small glimpse of what may come in the future.

 

[DanielleM]

So I know this thread is old, but I wanted to say that I hope your son had a good Boys Night Out.

We experienced something similar about a year ago. My now 4 year old daughter has special needs. She has microcephaly, complex partial seizures and an undiagnosed genetic condition. Her overall development is that of a 2 year old. Developmentally, she's behind her 2.5 year old brother.

We attend a playgroup and I sent out invitations for her third birthday party. It's so difficult because I plan her birthday parties around her developmental age and not chronological age. What other kids her age might be able to enjoy and do, she does not because she's not there yet. So, I booked two hours at an indoor playground thinking that was the perfect "inbetween".

Of 15 kids invited, only three responded. Two of them said they weren't coming. 12 kids ignored the invitation.

My heart broke. It felt worse for me than it did for my daughter. She didn't understand, thankfully, and I dread the day that she wants to have a birthday party and can understand it when kids don't respond or don't show up. I don't want to have to face the questions.

I didn't care that I was out $300 for a cake and private booking of a playground and couldn't get my money back. I was heartbroken that this was a small glimpse of what may come in the future.

This will not be her future honestly!!! This is the parents not the kids, once she is in school and making friends, all of her friends will want to come to her parties and the parents will not be making those decisions!! My son is 7 in August and he has many friends, he is having a bowling party and we are having to trim the list down as there are too many. Please don't let this get to you, it will not be her future

 

[educationist]

Awful.
i really feel for u and him.

 

[mskellydenise]

Were the invitations given out at school???
At my daughter school they arent supposed to hand out the invitations in class unless everyone in the class is invited

 

[helenb]

this is sickening, no wonder you are so angry and upset.

my son had a problem with a boy at school who acted as if my sons disability was contagious and it was getting us both upset. he was being targeted for not being able to do what other kids could do. there was a course then held at the school for parents to participate with their kids and gain a qualification in sports coaching and i signed us up.

this kid was also signed up and i was gobsmacked when i realised what was going on. this kids dad had a massive issue with any kid who had disabilities and it was evident in this course as he regularly singled my kid out for things he couldn't do so his kid would "win" that particular part of a game etc.

i was furious and discovered that i was really good at kicking him right in between his legs EVERYTIME he came near me - even in games that didn't involve feet. i was so good at making it look accidental. the more my child was singled out, the more and the harder i kicked until he eventually realised what i was doing. violence is never the key when someone is ignorant to a childs disabilities it infuriates me. i would kick him again if i saw him, i felt so much better (he did need get his glory checked out, i had badly bruised his tackle )

in my opinion it didn't change his sons opinion of my child, ignorance comes from the parents in my view. a little bit of tact and you can make mam feel guilty, otherwise, let me know where you are and i am sure my right foot can come in handy!

 

[mom22boys]

So sorry! I would talk to his teacher! We have a rule at our school if everyone is not invited then the invites need to be given out somewhere else!

 

[JASMAK]

I worry about this kind of thing with my daughter. I am so sorry...how unfair!!