I give up - career giving me a headache!

[aimee-lou]

I am in a quandry. I want my boys to be proud of me, I want a career that I can look back on and think 'Yes, I enjoyed that!' and I will confess, a bit of a pension/pay packet would be nice.

I'm 29, have 2 small children and plan on having 1 more within the next 3 years.

I have a history degree, which while I still love my subject, it's not where my career is headed (been there, done that lol). I have lots of experience in customer service, but again, I'm fed up with it as let's face it I don't want to be 55 and still on minimum wage.

I have 3 choices at the moment and I'm really stuck as all have their merits, and 2 of them are going to be tougher than the other, but that's not putting me off so much as making me really think. I don't want to miss my children growing up, and I want to be there with/for them as much as I can too. I realise I can't have everything but I need to at least try.

Option 1 is to apply for teacher training. I have read so many threads on here about people struggling when they are teachers, but I have the funding available and it would allow me long term to have long holidays etc with my growing children. I have to say that last week I was all for this but reality kicked in and I just think maybe it will be a lot of hard work and stress on all of us, but in the long term I can't help thinking it would serve us well. I am also very aware that it's not really my calling and a lot of people say that it's more a vocation than a career and I worry that my heart potentially wouldn't be in it.

Option 2 (which was always the plan tbh) I need to wait until hubby has finished all his training - he's currently at Uni studying to become a teacher, has 2.5 years left - and then I will go back to college myself. In the meantime I would just take any old job. While this is the most convenient, when hubby finishes I'll be 32/33 and tbh I don't think I will relish the thought of going back to school at that age. I would love to be a Vet Nurse and this will take a lot of work so it's not like it's the easy way out, it's just so far away and I'm impatient! I would be looking to take my 'any old job' in vet surgeries for example, or volunteer in the meantime, so maybe I should jus go with what I've had in my head for 2 years now

Option 3 - I have the opportunity to do my training to become a Teaching Assistant. I could do this for a couple of years, or for the rest of my working life potentially. I wonder whether this would work well WITH option 2, rather than instead of. It would also allow me the flexibility of option 1. However, I kind of feel like it's a cop out and wonder if I'm not going to be living up to my full potential. In reality though I suppose I have to admit I'm a Mum of 2, hopefully soon 3, and I have to put them first and this route would allow me to do this. I could then go on to do my vet nurse training if it doesn't work out and I wont have wasted 2 years of teacher training for example.

I'm really unsure. In recent years, I've lost a lot of confidence, especially when it comes to my working abilities. I don't want to let myself, or my family down, but at the same time I want to do something worthwhile.

I don't know whether I'm looking for advice, or for someone to simple say 'do this!' but I know I just needed to get this out.

Sorry this has turned out so long. I guess it's better out than in! Well done if you've read it all and I'm grateful for any replies I get.

 

[Mrs.S.]

I think option 3 sounds the best option for your situation. it would give you a starting in education which would look good on your cv and it would allow you to see whether it is for you or not (whilst still benefiting from the extended holidays etc with your lo's) and as you said, with this option you have the flexibility to do you veterinary nurse training if you decide that working in education isn't for you x

 

[aimee-lou]

I think option 3 sounds the best option for your situation. it would give you a starting in education which would look good on your cv and it would allow you to see whether it is for you or not (whilst still benefiting from the extended holidays etc with your lo's) and as you said, with this option you have the flexibility to do you veterinary nurse training if you decide that working in education isn't for you x

Thanks much for the reply. I think I know that this is the best option, but have my parents voices in my head of 'you've got so much potential, don't waste it.' Problem there of course is you spend so much time thinking and wondering the opportunities pass you by.

Thanks again. I think writing the post kind of cleared it up, but knowing that a complete outsider thinks the same, as well as my husband and my gut instinct, cleared it up completely.

Well done for reading the whole thing. It kind of developed a life of it's own!

 

[Pearls18]

Hi hun I just wanted to post because you sound so like me!!! I am a history graduate who has to work around my husband's career (military). I fell pregnant post-degree but before being fully qualified for something. I always thought I wanted to be a teacher (it was why I went to uni) but never got around to it because I knew I wouldn't like it enough for how demanding the job would be. So I have gone into the heritage sector, I started off in museums, then libraries and now archives lol. The work is more flexible than teaching, more interesting for me (more history based) and well...better paid lol, I already earn more than a qualified teacher -out of London- as an assistant. All these jobs usually entail a degree (history- perfect) some voluntary work, this will usually land you an assistant job and from there you need an MA to qualify. When you work in these fields you deal with subjects relating to your degree, but get to work with people (customer care) and there is an aspect of teaching and education too, I find it is a perfect mix of everything. I'm thinking I may eventually do my PG Cert to be an education officer in archives so a qualified teacher but in an archival environment. I work part time as an archives assistant and am studying my MA part time, we are planning another child in the next 2 years. If we suddently have to move I can take my MA with me. My biggest concern is our next posting is Norfolk (near you lol) and there won't be the jobs there that there are in London. Anyways sorry if this was all droll but I really relate to you But yes I would go with option 3 to make sure that teaching is the career for you than jumping straight in

 

[aimee-lou]

Hi hun I just wanted to post because you sound so like me!!! I am a history graduate who has to work around my husband's career (military). I fell pregnant post-degree but before being fully qualified for something. I always thought I wanted to be a teacher (it was why I went to uni) but never got around to it because I knew I wouldn't like it enough for how demanding the job would be. So I have gone into the heritage sector, I started off in museums, then libraries and now archives lol. The work is more flexible than teaching, more interesting for me (more history based) and well...better paid lol, I already earn more than a qualified teacher -out of London- as an assistant. All these jobs usually entail a degree (history- perfect) some voluntary work, this will usually land you an assistant job and from there you need an MA to qualify. When you work in these fields you deal with subjects relating to your degree, but get to work with people (customer care) and there is an aspect of teaching and education too, I find it is a perfect mix of everything. I'm thinking I may eventually do my PG Cert to be an education officer in archives so a qualified teacher but in an archival environment. I work part time as an archives assistant and am studying my MA part time, we are planning another child in the next 2 years. If we suddently have to move I can take my MA with me. My biggest concern is our next posting is Norfolk (near you lol) and there won't be the jobs there that there are in London. Anyways sorry if this was all droll but I really relate to you But yes I would go with option 3 to make sure that teaching is the career for you than jumping straight in

Thanks for the thorough reply. I actually used to work in Museums. I was a Museums officer in Yorkshire prior to having Earl but the joy was sucked out of that for me by some bad experiences. I did think about doing library/archives but as you say there aren't the jobs unless you have a way in around here. I live very close to one of the council run museums and will be applying there for part time work in the new year as I do have the right qualifications etc, but I just don't see myself starting off on that ladder again.

Do you know where in Norfolk you'll be stationed?

As it is, the decision is pretty much made now. I spoke to my husband in great length about it, and we have decided that I will start my veterinary assistant course either by distance learning or at the local land college next year I am currently assembling a mailing list to apply for part time work/work experience in the sector and hope to be able to kick start my career enough for me to be able to take 9-12m off to have a 3rd baby in 2014-ish and then go on to do my RVN 3 year course (which is work-based). I'm as giddy as a school girl! The key thing that helped me to make the decision was if I'm questioning it, it's obviously not going to be right, so I have gone with my gut, same as you, I'm just not sure I would enjoy teaching enough to make a career out of it.

Good luck with your MA btw. I know how hard studying can be when it's part time. Sounds like you've found your path. Hope that I've found mine now - tbh I'm sick of worrying about it lol.