i can't imagine how hard this must be for you. i've never carried a baby for that long and lost it. i'm so sorry. i have a phone number who counsels women who have gone through a loss over the phone. her services are free. but she is in Ohio in the states. i don't know if that's long distance for you or not. but if it isn't pm me and i'll give you her number. or if you just want to talk. i had a missed m/c yesterday, with a baby we had been trying for for 9 months. so i kind of know what you are going through. i don't know what i would have done without this site. all the women on here are so nice. and offer so much support. it is the best thing in my life right now, besides my family of course. again, i'm so sorry for your loss. but and i don't know how this might sound, but i mean it in the best possible way. at least you have one healthy baby to look forward to. and that's something to look forward to and to go on for. your little boy will never be forgotten. But you do have to be strong for the little boy you are still carrying. your in my thoughts and prayers.