I hate my new midwife!

[Ju_bubbs]

Just having a little vent! I moved house just before xmas, so had to change to the midwife in my new area.. theres only one that covers the whole area, so I had no choice and presumably can't change! Anyway, just been to meet her for my 34wk appt... told her that my previous midwife had booked me for a home water birth etc and filled her in on how my previous 4 labours have got progressively earlier and faster... by fast, I mean 5 hours, 3 hours, 20 minutes, and 15 minutes. And by earlier I mean... 40wks, 39 wks, 38wks and 37wks..

Now maybe I'm over reacting, hormones and what not.. but I really really didn't like the way she was! My last midwife was MORE than happy to 'OK' my homebirth from 36 weeks, mainly because it's expected to be in the 36th week, and to last around 15 minutes at most from the first contraction and the hospital is quite a distance! depending on the time of day, it can take over an hour to get there, even at night, with no traffic its a 25 minute journey. (I just made it on baby NO3, leaving home at 3am, by flying through speed cameras at 100mph, and ignoring red lights, I got to the hospital with enough time to spare to get my knickers round my ankles LOL!

So anyway this new midwife... after being told all of this asks if my partner is at home with me, so I tell her I'm single... she gasped, and said you MUST have another adult staying with you if you're going to have a home birth, then goes on to say that I absolutely can not use my pool unless I have a liner (which I have got, but dont see why I NEED one!)

Then carries on with 'well if you go into labour before 37 weeks you'll have to go into hospital anyway'.. so I reminded her of the reasoning behind my old midwife being happy with 36wks at home.. and she went on about having to consider the safety of me and the baby... at this point I got quite wound up and said something like...'YES! THAT is the exact reason I WILL be birthing at home, even at 36 weeks, I'm no expert but I am fairly certain that it is safer for my baby, my other children, and myself for me to labour in a planned, prepared environment at home, with paramedics/midwife on route to assist me, than for me to bundle all my children into my car, then give birth in said car, half way to hospital! And that's only assuming that someone would be able to get here before I gave birth, to drive me!

Then she decided to tell me that I would HAVE to phone an ambulance, so I asked her if there is room for a labouring woman AND 4 children in an ambulance! Just to be awkward! She said no... so I said do you suggest I leave my children at home alone then or are you going to pay for a live in nanny for me!? GRRRRRR

Oh, she didn't quite know what to say when she tried telling me that there is no way that I will be able to deliver a baby myself... while coping with labour... I greatly enjoyed telling her that the midwife didn't make it to my last labour, and I delivered Imogen in my birth pool, at home.. myself! HA!

STUPID BITCH!

Ahhhh thats better!

 

[imagine13]

Different area, different policy I guess. The cut off here is 37 weeks so if I go into labour earlier I am considered 'high-risk' and will "have to go in and have a consultant monitored birth". Yeah, we'll see

Lol though! Love how your body is not going to be bothered with all the NHS red tape. Wonder how quick this labour will be for you?! I think you should put all this in a letter to head midwife. That way when your baby shoots out in 6 mins and they fail to get a midwife or ambulance there they can't say they weren't warned

 

[Ju_bubbs]

LOL @ when your baby shoots out in 6 mins!! Hope its a little bit longer than that.. I atleast want half a pool of water!!! lol

 

[imagine13]

Better use my OH's suggestion he used at antenatal class when they asked what the worst position to give birth in was and he said "upside down"

On a serious note are there any training doulas or a volunteer doula service in your area so you have some support and don't have to deliver on your own again.

 

[becstar]

There will be a supervisor of midwives in your area, even if only one midwife covers it (but two are supposed to be present for births so there should be at least one more available!) - speak to her, get PALS at your local hospital involved and generally just cause a fuss until they listen.

I just had to contact the Clinical Midwifery Manager etc over an issue booking mine and as a result the local team has been readvised of their policies, so it can make a difference.

 

[xSin]

Better use my OH's suggestion he used at antenatal class when they asked what the worst position to give birth in was and he said "upside down"

Sounds like something my OH would say LOL

Sorry to hear about the trouble with the midwife though, it sounds like she's not acknowleging that you could possibly be at all aware of your own body... and that's too bad Hopefully it all gets sorted out very soon!

 

[Ju_bubbs]

Excuse my language... but F*^* them! When I go into labour, I'll call them, tell them I expect a midwife to attend, and if they don't and something goes wrong that could have been prevented by a midwife being here, I will be seeing my solicitor!

As for a doula.. I'm not sure, but the reason I gave birth alone last time was because the midwife couldn't get to my house in time, even though she was only 7 miles along a very quiet road, so doubtful anyone else would have got to me on time either! lol. I'm kinda hoping the midwife doesn't make it to me again tbh, just having a 'medical professional' in the room, even if they have been told not to get involved would have made me so stressed! I have faith in my body, and know it will tell me if something is wrong without being poked, proded and monitored! It was by far the best, most relaxing labour experience I could ever hope for, last time even though I wasn't prepared for going it alone!

 

[bettny]

LOL @ u rubbing it her face that u HAVE done it before love it!
another thing is dont stress if ur labors are really that fast u will have ur home birth anyway! they will just arrive to help clean up!

 

[Ju_bubbs]

Haha, yeah I did enjoy that bit! lol. I'm not stressing over it so much now Ive had time to get over that 1st appt! I'll be leaving it as late as possible until I phone the midwife when I do go into labour.. and if she gets here in time, I'll be kicking her out of the room if she starts stressig me out!!