I need some Advice

[emdeb]

I have always wanted a water birth at home and know that this can only be done if all is well with the little monster and me. Well at my booking in appointment the midwife rushed through everything and seemed to be more focused on breast feeding, when it came to the point to discuss birthing opens she just said to me "you are going to hospital, aren't you" well I was a bit shocked and just said yes so I could escape from her.

Last week I had my 16 week appointment and I made DH come with me so we could tell her that we wanted a home birth if possible. I had been having some bleeding as a result from a blood clot after the 12 week scan so I knew she would probably say it wasn't likely or some rubbish like that, but when we broached the subject she was really funny about it and her response was that she wouldn't even discuss it again until 37 weeks.

DH has said that we should wait until after teh 20 week scan and see if everything is OK and if it is then we try to discuss it again at my 24 week appointment and if she is funny again, request another midwife.

Has anyone else had any issues with their midwife and wanting a home birth?

 

[summer rain]

Hi

if you live in an area where you only have the one midwife you see throughout; then it may be an idea to change.

Soph x

 

[milkmachine]

with my last baby they were very much like that, refused to even discuss it properly till much later on. if i were you id just ask for another midwife.x

 

[snagglepat]

It's definitely worth asking for another midwife. Our midwives have been very happy to discuss home birth with us at both the booking appointment and the dating scan. There should be no issues at all - and your bleeding/clot shouldn't cause a problem at all. She can't seriously expect you to wait until 37 weeks because at that point they should be ready to come to you if you go into labour but if they haven't even discussed it then how can they have an on call rota in place and be sure you're making an informed choice?

I know several midwife teams who are reluctant to support home births because when someone does book one they all have to go on call (on a rota - not all the time). If they only have one or two a year they can find this really annoying - they can't have that glass of wine on the evenings they're on call. Teams that have home births more often are used to this - they are around here where the home birth rate can be as high as 9% some years - so they don't mind it, it's just part of the job. The fact is it's part of the job for your midwives too and they should be supporting it.

Definitely bring it up again and if that doesn't work write a letter to the head of midwifery explaining that you would like to book a home birth but that the midwife you have been seeing (give her name) has said she won't discuss it until 37 weeks. Explain you know this isn't what is considered best practice in other areas and why you feel that it's much too late in the pregnancy to be making such decisions - for you - and ask for her guidance and support. You'll be amazed at how much things can change just because you put it down on paper.

Good luck!

Gina. x

 

[Rachiebaby24]

ask for another mw or wait and see for a bit....my mw wasnt that interested until the later stages either as she said many women change their minds!