i think i want him back

[Mummy2B1989]

this might be a long rant-y post but i need to get this off my chest ..

my ex fiance and i split up in september (it was my decision as we hadnt been getting along for a while and he didnt help me with the 2 kids etc) so anyway, i thought i was over him before we even broke up basically, and i was happy. i was seeing someone else and so was he.

neither of those relationships lasted long.

things he would still do still drove me mad and on a few occasions i would say to my mum etc that i def made the right decision.

fast forward to last month, i was tidying out our medicine cupboard and came across his hayfever tablets - well- that was me, i broke down sobbing my heart out. it was like thats when i reaslised it was over. a few days later i was over it.
then last week i was sitting and broke down again. i think i genuinely miss him. i miss the contented feeling of being settled with him and the kids. the comfortable feeling when the kids were asleep just sitting with him watching tv. family days out. things like this.

so for the last few days ive really struggled. he has met someone and theyve been together only for a few days basically but i know i wouldnt interfere with that or anything.

it is just so hard. how can someone have such a delayed reaction to a break up??

i keep thinking that if it doesnt work out with this girl i should ask him to do something, even just a day out with the kids.
my friends and family would 100% not approve, but i feel like if i had the chance i would want to try and put my family back together.
obviously i know he might never want that, but surely its worth a try, if the opportunity came up?

im so teary its unreal, i dont know how there can be any tears left.

 

[RaspberryK]

It's normal, well I think it is as I had some delayed reactions to my break up and coming across old stuff sets off memories etc. But of course you're looking at it through rose tinted glasses. All I had to do was look at a couple of texts from him and it put me right off.
I suggest you go through the whole house and clear out anything else that is his and either give it back or bin it. It's great therapy.
Think how confusing it would be for the children, especially when it all goes pear shaped again.
I've taken my children on family daysout jusy me and them, sometimes with my parents and siblings and even friends and we (I) have a much better time as I'm not trying to organise a manchild at the same time.
X

 

[MrsT&Ben]

I had to go through some old paperwork a few weeks ago. I came across our marriage certificate. It really threw me. I got upset. My wedding day was the best day of my life (after giving birth to my children). I felt sad that we weren't together anymore. But I know that we are both better off apart.
I think it's only natural. Have a long hard think about it.
Remember all the reasons you broke up. They will still be there if you got back together.
Massive hugs sweetie x

 

[princessellie]

I think unless one or both of you have changed, then all the old problems will still be there. If you feel like you are better people now and more able to deal with problems that broke you up, then definitely go for it, it's worth a try, but if nothing really has changed then its not worth it for the kids sakes x