If you have other children, when did you tell them?

[Ceilani]

I have a 5 y/o stepson who has been thrilled at the idea of me growing a little brother or sister in my belly (we introduced the concept to him a few months ago in order to get him used to it).

My question is, when did you actually tell your other child that you were pregnant? We're struggling a little with this one. Part of me doesn't want to say anything until I'm in 2nd tri just in case something happens, but part of me also wants to share in the joy of our knowledge with him and not have to hide anything. Especially since we are telling our parents and closest friends right away. DH would like to tell him sooner rather than later as well, but has said he'll leave the decision to when I feel comfortable. Not to mention, he's a smart kid and picks up on things like crazy.

What are your thoughts?

 

[mommy2lilmen]

We haven't told the kids. Im showing but I am hiding it. I am unsure when to tell. Im almost 4 months along.

 

[maybebaby3]

We told our kids after the scan at 6wks.

 

[binksmommy]

I told my daughter at 10 weeks I think...

 

[euansmama]

I too am struggling with this one.

After having two mc I am a little reluctant to say anything. DH keeps hinting at telling our youngest (who is 3 ) but I want to wait until I have had my first scan at least I think. Our other children who are older (and some have children of their own) we will tell after the 12wk scan

 

[MnMommy]

We told our 4 year old somewhere between 8-10 weeks or so. I forget when exactly. It was when we told our family as we knew he would understand the conversations and that our family wouldn't be able to not talk about it in front of him. Plus it was really important that he be the first person we told so he could tell everyone. We have really tried to include him as much as we can to minimize any negative affect on him. Plus I was super sick and he couldn't figure out why mommy was sick all the time, so then it made some sense to him.

That said, I can understand the waiting. We went in for our 12 week scan and found two babies, but one heartbeat. We could still go home and tell him the baby was fine, but if there had only been one to start off, then it would have been a really hard conversation.

I think you have to know your child and what the child can handle. My son had been begging for a baby for 2 years and so he was very excited and has loved reading about the baby with the weekly updates. Not all kids will understand that or be as excited. You have to do what is best first for your child and second for you and OH.

 

[ragae32]

We told our kids .she very happy.https://bgrh.info/7.jpg

 

[Butterball Ma]

I am 33, but since my family doctor (not OB) considers me of "advanced maternal age," I hope you won't kick me out

We had a mmc at 18 weeks in Oct. Our (then) 10 year old DD was with us because it was the day we were supposed to find out the gender. She did a lot of growing up that day, but she handled it really well.

When I got this most current positive test, I set the test high up on a shelf in the bathroom, until I could show DH. We hadn't discussed telling DD yet, but that night on the way home from dinner she popped into the conversation with," So when are you gonna tell me the big news?" She's too smart for her own good so, we were spared telling her, since she snooped and saw the test.

And truly, I'm glad I didn't keep it from her either time. She's quite a source of comfort to me and will come pat my "lump" and sing to us, lol.

 

[chicka.chicka]

We tend to tell the kids soon after the positive HPT. I start showing early and get moderately bad morning sickness. It's hard to hide the fact that I'm suddenly more tired, cranky, and puking. LOL With both of my miscarriages, my kids were aware of what was going on.

 

[TicToc]

We told them right away, the 16 and 22 year old anyway. I just told my 19 year old today when he had a chance to call from his army deployment. We had two losses in the past few years and so while this time around we are not telling most people for a bit, they had to know in case I had another loss (they live here) and so that they would know why I was being extra careful with my chemical sensitivity issues. Sometimes I take risks and get ill, but not for the rest of this year

Plus, they would have eventually overheard us talking....and I am always crying for no reason

 

[Ceilani]

Thank you for the replies everyone.

I ended up mc at 5 weeks, before we had told him. I'm glad we didn't say anything; he's been wishing for a baby sibling, and I didn't want to have to break his heart by explaining the baby wasn't going to come anymore.

We're trying for a rainbow baby now; DH and I talked it over, and we're going to wait until the 12 week scan to tell him when I'm pregnant again. I know things can still happen after that point, but the odds decrease significantly.

H&H 9 months to all of you!

 

[chicka.chicka]

Sorry for your loss. I hope you get your rainbow baby soon!

 

[BionicMommy]

I am 7 weeks along and very nervous about telling the kids. My son, 6, will be super excited.
My two stepsons 13 and 16 probably not excited at all and i am nervous about their reaction......anyone relate?