i'm scared

[staycutee]

people are probs getting sick of me and my posts moaning but here i go again

im gonna be a single mum in 5 weeks and i am really trying to get excited, i cant wait to see my little boy. but i feel my family are ruining everything for me, none of my ideas or plans are good enough.

firstly the dad is NOT involved in any way and he isnt going to be, he has said some very hurtful things and havent even heard from him in about 6 months. for this reason amongst others he isnt going on the birth certificate and i dont want child maintenance, i dont want him involved in ANY WAY. but my dad is ranting away every saying "yOU HAVE TO get him involved, ill beat him up if i see him" etc etc, just ridiclous things which are getting me stressed.

he doesnt wanna be involved and i dnt want him to be so what the hell gives my dad the right to decide? my dad has no way of contacting him so its not like he can gobehind my back (altho he would if he could) but im very worried about hearing this everyday and getting told im a bad mum for not giving my baby a dad. as if its all my fault.

my dad also keeps goingon about the baby getting his name as a imddle name, and that he is gonna buy him a football shirt/ I DONT WANT MY NEWBORN IN A FOOTBALL BABYGRO FFS! am i being unreasonable for wanting to dress him in cute white things and not wanting him growing up in football clothes with a chunky gold ring???
jesus

 

[babybaillie]

(((((HUGS)))))

Sounds awful. Do u live with ur parents? what age are u?

I think u need to stand up to ur parents. i no its easier said than done. But u need to be firm now, otherwise they will walk all over u, and demand things are done there way indefinately, or at least until u do stand up to them. They have had the chance to bring up there child. Now its there time to just enjoy being grandparents. which means enjoy the baby, not take over.....

good luck with it. i hope u get things sorted

 

[McLovin]

Awww hunni I am always moaning on here - if people don't wana hear it they just don't have to read. Don't feel like anyone on here gets fed up with 'moaning'. We all come on here to get support and to give it don't we? That's why I come on here anyway : )


Only you can decide what is best for you and ur baby, so tell your family you have "made your mind up, you have your reasons, and tough luck if they don't like it".
Only you know in your heart what's best for you both, don't let anybody else tell you otherwise - you have a whole load more decisions to make going forward, like what schools to send him to etc. - you have to believe in yourself that you know what's best.
xxx

 

[purpledahlia]

dont worry your dad will calm down once the baby is here hes just angry at the FOB just now i think. If he has no way of contacting theFOB then no worries.. but, if you claim IS then the jobcentre will get csa involved anyway.. dont u want the extra money from him? he doesnt need to go on the BC to get it.

 

[lou_w34]

Ahhh dont worry, im forever moaning and grumbling about something or other on here! If it helps to write it down then go for it!

Your dad sounds like mine! lol, they mean well.... but still.... it would be easier if they'd just shut it for a while! If he has no way of contacting the FOB id just let him blow off his steam and rant for a bit! He'll soon get over it.

My dad hates the name ive picked aswell, but i just ignore him now, he knows he has no say in the matter, he's just trying to voice his opinion... annoying but there you go! lol

Just say to your dad youve made up your mind and that is that, it should shut him up for a lil while

 

[staycutee]

thanks ladies i do want the extra money from FOB but if i try and get it he will try and get involved out of spite, even though he has said very hurtful things and i really just dont want it happening, he is useless!

im gonna be strong and stand up to my dad, i'll be 21 next month so its about time i did!
xxxxx

 

[purpledahlia]

In that case when the jobcentre get them involved you will have to say you dont know who the dad is... theyre very pushy, but also very crap.
yeah just tell your dad your baby isnt wearing anything you dont like! He can just deal with it your a grown up now! if he moans about the dad just tell him straight your better off without him and he needs to close his trap! x