Introducing your child(ren) to a new partner

[Natsku]

Whats the best way of doing this? How long do you wait? Do you speak to your ex first about it?

 

[Jade--x]

I waited months to introduce my ex. I didn't speak to FOB because 1 we don't speak and 2 its none of his business if I'm seeing someone anyway. I just introduced him as a friend and things went on from there. I didn't sit and explain how this is Mummys boyfriend. He was still young though so I suppose it depends on how old your LOs are x

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

I made my own choice about when the time was right. However, no way would I discuss it with FOB. It's nothing to do with him

 

[Natsku]

I guess I just wouldn't want my ex introducing Maria to a new girlfriend without telling me first so I suppose I owe him the same courtesy.

My boyfriend wants to meet Maria but I dunno if its too soon or not. He seems to be pretty serious about us, and I do want them to meet at some point and don't want to put it off too long because otherwise they might have to meet in stressful circumstances (too complicated to explain but its possible in the fairly near future).

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

My OH met Josh at the same time he met me. I had no bad feelings about it at all. Trust your gut Nats.

But with regard to your ex, be careful. You don't want him to start thinking he has a say over your life, by dressing it up to be about Maria. What you do in your time with Maria is up to you. I'm assuming you don't tell him what to do with his time with her.

 

[Natsku]

I don't tell him what to do, and I wouldn't let him tell me what to do but I think its fair to let him know. He did ask me if it was ok to take Maria to visit some friends of his so he seems to think its important to communicate who she's going to be around.

 

[Fraggles]

I have no contact with ex so that wasnt an issue. He met them at a soft play centre so neutral ground and kids were busy having fun so wasnt a big pressure moment. Same with his kids went bowling.

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

Ah right, does he know about your new bf? If he's being that mature about this then yeah I'd tell him. I'm glad he seems to be working with you for Maria now

 

[Natsku]

Yeah I told him about my boyfriend when he dropped Maria off this week.

He's being good in that way, just really shit bringing her back on the right day

 

[Kate&Lucas]

I like to start off as friends with any potential partner, so I introduce them to Lucas that way. Personally I like to 'get it out of the way' early on, before any proper relationship happens. It's just easier because I wouldn't carry on with it if I didn't believe they could have a good relationship with Lucas.
Originally I told FOB, wanting to be completely open and honest. Unfortunately he didn't show me the same respect so I don't bother anymore.

 

[Mummy2aStar]

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[Mummy2aStar]

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[Natsku]

They're going to meet today (if all goes according to plan). We're hoping to meet in the park so Maria will be happy playing but if the weather is bad we're going to a friend's house. Just going to introduce him as a friend, there will be other friends around too so it won't be so much like she's meeting him, but rather meeting a few friends.

Fingers crossed it goes ok. I expect her to be really shy and wary of him anyway the first time as she's like that with most of my male friends when she first meets them but hoping she'll warm up to him

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

Good luck Nats