Iria's THAT WAS IT.. [CAUTION- really traumatic story]

[Iria]

So.. BEFORE you read it, I just want to point out its not a happy story..

Its so painful to even recall everything exactly.. and I don’t mean “painful” because of contractions or pain itself.. Thing is I couldn’t understand why events went so horribly wrong and no one wanted to listen what I or OH was saying.. The whole story is like a long torture performed by bunch of idiots who have no clue what they are doing.. Its sad to say that as NHS [National Health system] is one of the best on the world.. but every time when I needed to explain WHY hospital will not induce my SOO overdue pregnancy earlier, nobody couldn’t believe it..

So for all ladies who looking some kind of motivation or anything positive, my story is not that.. My story shows how everything can generally go wrong..

MY DUE DATE WAS 4th of May.
I went overdue, and the induction date was set up for 16th of May [41+5]. That day hospital supposed to call, but they never did, so I called them.. once, twice, every time they would say : WE ARE TOO BUSY,THERE IS NO ROOM FOR YA, CALL LATER.. So after 5th rejected time, I decided to call next morning [Thur. 17th of May] and pretend that my baby have stopped moving. This way they WILL HAVE TO TAKE ME IN.

So, in the morning OH and I called hospital, lied about the baby movements, and we were told to come straight. I was taken at 8 am on Thursday because of the fact that my baby have stopped moving. Obviously, very quickly they found it was a lie.. so we had to express our feelings really strongly that we want this baby to be out TODAY.
Eventually we got the room 6 hours later.. and that was the time when my “induction” began.


Just to keep it short, and not going into much details, that’s what has happened next:

Thursday: around 14.00 hrs we got the room, the induction began .. and something wasn’t working- contractions were too intense, I didn’t feel that so strong but it affected the baby’s heart.. so after 16 hours they decided to stop that and ..just wait.
After 4 hours they broken my waters [that was already Friday afternoon].. that didn’t bring anything much either.. At this point, midwives from the Home from Home Centre [ where I was admitted] said that because I just passed 42 wks that day, they couldnt treat me anymore and I need to be transferred to Birth Centre [which was just on the other side of the same floor]; they will transfer me as soon as there.. will be a room for me
so here we go again, waiting for my room..

We were admitted to Birth Centre shortly after midnight [so it was Saturday] and left on our own for another 2.5 hrs..
[just to remind, my water were broken on Friday at the afternoon time so its been more then 10 hrs of no intervention].. at this point I started feeling strong contractions, still waiting for any midwife to come to our room.. finally there was one lady, she came put me on monitor, and said she doesn’t believe im in labor as I wouldn’t be able to talk. She said she will be monitoring me for 20 min and then we will decide what to do next. She vanished from the room for another ...1hr and 40 min.. when she came back, I was hardly breathing through contractions, she took a look and said “oh, yes you have contractions”...
REALLY ?!


Next thing I remember she said that contractions are strong but not close enough (I was only 3 cm open being in pain for so many hours!).. OH and I started demanding C section at that point, as I was so tired, so overdue and from medical point of view, once your water are broken, you must deliver baby within 24hrs because of high risk of infection.
She didn’t want to listen and said C section is not an option. They will induce me by putting me on the medicine drip which will put the contractions stronger and closer. Bur for that,.. we need to move to Delivery room.. as soon as one will be free.. Again.

Around 5 am we were moved to Delivery Room. And only in that moment there was one sensible midwife there who saw our tired faces and asked what really happen so far. She took really good care of me and OH, supported me very strongly. At the end when she was finishing her shift [3 hrs later] I said how much she made my day better.. but unfortunately, she was there just for 3 hours..
So, when we got to that room, plan was to put me on that drip. As this was, apparently, very intense medicine which never fails they proposed me take an epidural as a pain relief. I was offered epidural before taking the drip as they saw how tired I was already. When doctor asked me what is my decision I said “I don’t have a choice, I will not be able to push this baby without pain relief”.. So they gave me epidural. And put on drip and asked me to not drink and not to eat anything anymore [I haven't eaten for more than 10 hours already].. they put me on nutritional fluids drip, attached to blood pressure machine, put the pipe into my bladder as I couldn’t control my bladder anymore; also they put me on monitoring machine..
Epidural did its job, but there was small area in my right down side of belly when epidural didn’t reach, so with each contraction I could feel its power..

Time was passing.. Contractions didn’t got closer. Around afternoon they decided to put me on antibiotic to avoid the infection.
At that point I started loosing it.. I felt that any questions which I was asked were like in the dream.. though I perfectly new I was not sleeping..
Around 3pm contractions got so strong that baby;s heart would dropped very low..
At some point, heart beat stopped.......
Midwife rang the alarm and all midwives and doc appeared in the room. I don’t remember much cause I was feeling too light headed, I just screamed that I TOLD YOU TO DO C SECTION!! I cried cause I was scared he is dying..

Even after that they decided to put me on more antibiotics and carry on with the drip.. they ve checked me and I was 7 cm.. So when I started demanding that I cant do that any more, they said its all normal, first pregnancy goes for days, Im lucky cause everything happens in hospital, and most women go through the pain at home.. I was too weak to argue.

Very quickly, though, things have changed. They didn’t like the baby;s heart beat dropping.. and they decided to put some instrument inside to scratch HIS HEAD to take a blood sample to check how much oxygen he really has.. When midwife was performing it, she realized Im less open then before.. so for another few minutes they couldn’t reach the consensus how really open am I..

My blood pressure was getting higher and temperature suddenly got to 39.7 degrees[ C]. That was shortly after 3pm.
Within a half an hour I landed on the emergency C section, with high blood pressure, high temperature and baby’s heart beating dropping ..
When I was on the table, I was half conscious. I hardly understood meaning of what is said to me, was answering often something which wasn’t related to the question. OH was all this time next to me. My heart beat was too quick, so I forced myself to relax. I used visualizations of my son, OH, together in the future.. that made me calm so they could start operation. I remember I was focusing so much that my heart will not stop.. I was so scared I will die before giving him life.. God, there was no fucking words to describe how I felt..
Operation took ages, they couldnt take him out cause his head was quite large and was stocked already in my pelvis... OH was telling me everything so I could have some control over the situation.

He was born at 15.55 on Saturday 19th of May after 56 hrs of struggling.
He was 55 cm long [!] and weight 3,2 kg. When I saw him first time he was just soo perfect.. so beautiful that Tristan and I were surprised of his cuteness
Once I was put off the table I was praying that he was healthy and fine.. At first minute he got 9/10 points and at 5th minute- 10/10 points. So all was great..

After that we were taken to post natal ward where I stayed for few hours. After that I was transferred to another room, where I stayed for full 3 days to recover. Baby and I were on antibiotics, different drips, fluids, painkillers.. all you can imagine At that point OH had to go home for a night and was coming back in the morning.. So it was tough to deal with physical weakness [couldn’t move for first day] and new born on your side.. But, looking at him I just forgot about everything in a second!

He is so beautiful, calm baby.. He doesn’t cry much for any reason, just when really something is not in his way.. I got so attached to him that I would sleep with him in one bed, having him hugged to my chest.. He is like best part of me, little treasure that sparkles our lives..

I ve decided to never get pregnant again but adopt in some few years.. Going so much overdue, I felt that my body doesn’t know how to deal with labor.. and Im pretty sure we would have died if the decision about C section hadn't been made...

So, I really dont wish ANYONE the same story..

All the best for you ladies!! As labour sucks, the reward afterwards is SOO BEAUTIFUL.. I love being a mom!!!!

Hugs..

 

[lemonlimelove]

So.. BEFORE you read it, I just want to point out its not a happy story..

Its so painful to even recall everything exactly.. and I don’t mean “painful” because of contractions or pain itself.. Thing is I couldn’t understand why events went so horribly wrong and no one wanted to listen what I or OH was saying.. The whole story is like a long torture performed by bunch of idiots who have no clue what they are doing.. Its sad to say that as NHS [National Health system] is one of the best on the world.. but every time when I needed to explain WHY hospital will not induce my SOO overdue pregnancy earlier, nobody couldn’t believe it..

So for all ladies who looking some kind of motivation or anything positive, my story is not that.. My story shows how everything can generally go wrong..

MY DUE DATE WAS 4th of May.
I went overdue, and the induction date was set up for 16th of May [41+5]. That day hospital supposed to call, but they never did, so I called them.. once, twice, every time they would say : WE ARE TOO BUSY,THERE IS NO ROOM FOR YA, CALL LATER.. So after 5th rejected time, I decided to call next morning [Thur. 17th of May] and pretend that my baby have stopped moving. This way they WILL HAVE TO TAKE ME IN.

So, in the morning OH and I called hospital, lied about the baby movements, and we were told to come straight. I was taken at 8 am on Thursday because of the fact that my baby have stopped moving. Obviously, very quickly they found it was a lie.. so we had to express our feelings really strongly that we want this baby to be out TODAY.
Eventually we got the room 6 hours later.. and that was the time when my “induction” began.


Just to keep it short, and not going into much details, that’s what has happened next:

Thursday: around 14.00 hrs we got the room, the induction began .. and something wasn’t working- contractions were too intense, I didn’t feel that so strong but it affected the baby’s heart.. so after 16 hours they decided to stop that and ..just wait.
After 4 hours they broken my waters [that was already Friday afternoon].. that didn’t bring anything much either.. At this point, midwives from the Home from Home Centre [ where I was admitted] said that because I just passed 42 wks that day, they couldnt treat me anymore and I need to be transferred to Birth Centre [which was just on the other side of the same floor]; they will transfer me as soon as there.. will be a room for me
so here we go again, waiting for my room..

We were admitted to Birth Centre shortly after midnight [so it was Saturday] and left on our own for another 2.5 hrs..
[just to remind, my water were broken on Friday at the afternoon time so its been more then 10 hrs of no intervention].. at this point I started feeling strong contractions, still waiting for any midwife to come to our room.. finally there was one lady, she came put me on monitor, and said she doesn’t believe im in labor as I wouldn’t be able to talk. She said she will be monitoring me for 20 min and then we will decide what to do next. She vanished from the room for another ...1hr and 40 min.. when she came back, I was hardly breathing through contractions, she took a look and said “oh, yes you have contractions”...
REALLY ?!


Next thing I remember she said that contractions are strong but not close enough (I was only 3 cm open being in pain for so many hours!).. OH and I started demanding C section at that point, as I was so tired, so overdue and from medical point of view, once your water are broken, you must deliver baby within 24hrs because of high risk of infection.
She didn’t want to listen and said C section is not an option. They will induce me by putting me on the medicine drip which will put the contractions stronger and closer. Bur for that,.. we need to move to Delivery room.. as soon as one will be free.. Again.

Around 5 am we were moved to Delivery Room. And only in that moment there was one sensible midwife there who saw our tired faces and asked what really happen so far. She took really good care of me and OH, supported me very strongly. At the end when she was finishing her shift [3 hrs later] I said how much she made my day better.. but unfortunately, she was there just for 3 hours..
So, when we got to that room, plan was to put me on that drip. As this was, apparently, very intense medicine which never fails they proposed me take an epidural as a pain relief. I was offered epidural before taking the drip as they saw how tired I was already. When doctor asked me what is my decision I said “I don’t have a choice, I will not be able to push this baby without pain relief”.. So they gave me epidural. And put on drip and asked me to not drink and not to eat anything anymore [I haven't eaten for more than 10 hours already].. they put me on nutritional fluids drip, attached to blood pressure machine, put the pipe into my bladder as I couldn’t control my bladder anymore; also they put me on monitoring machine..
Epidural did its job, but there was small area in my right down side of belly when epidural didn’t reach, so with each contraction I could feel its power..

Time was passing.. Contractions didn’t got closer. Around afternoon they decided to put me on antibiotic to avoid the infection.
At that point I started loosing it.. I felt that any questions which I was asked were like in the dream.. though I perfectly new I was not sleeping..
Around 3pm contractions got so strong that baby;s heart would dropped very low..
At some point, heart beat stopped.......
Midwife rang the alarm and all midwives and doc appeared in the room. I don’t remember much cause I was feeling too light headed, I just screamed that I TOLD YOU TO DO C SECTION!! I cried cause I was scared he is dying..

Even after that they decided to put me on more antibiotics and carry on with the drip.. they ve checked me and I was 7 cm.. So when I started demanding that I cant do that any more, they said its all normal, first pregnancy goes for days, Im lucky cause everything happens in hospital, and most women go through the pain at home.. I was too weak to argue.

Very quickly, though, things have changed. They didn’t like the baby;s heart beat dropping.. and they decided to put some instrument inside to scratch HIS HEAD to take a blood sample to check how much oxygen he really has.. When midwife was performing it, she realized Im less open then before.. so for another few minutes they couldn’t reach the consensus how really open am I..

My blood pressure was getting higher and temperature suddenly got to 39.7 degrees[ C]. That was shortly after 3pm.
Within a half an hour I landed on the emergency C section, with high blood pressure, high temperature and baby’s heart beating dropping ..
When I was on the table, I was half conscious. I hardly understood meaning of what is said to me, was answering often something which wasn’t related to the question. OH was all this time next to me. My heart beat was too quick, so I forced myself to relax. I used visualizations of my son, OH, together in the future.. that made me calm so they could start operation. I remember I was focusing so much that my heart will not stop.. I was so scared I will die before giving him life.. God, there was no fucking words to describe how I felt..
Operation took ages, they couldnt take him out cause his head was quite large and was stocked already in my pelvis... OH was telling me everything so I could have some control over the situation.

He was born at 15.55 on Saturday 19th of May after 56 hrs of struggling.
He was 55 cm long [!] and weight 3,2 kg. When I saw him first time he was just soo perfect.. so beautiful that Tristan and I were surprised of his cuteness
Once I was put off the table I was praying that he was healthy and fine.. At first minute he got 9/10 points and at 5th minute- 10/10 points. So all was great..

After that we were taken to post natal ward where I stayed for few hours. After that I was transferred to another room, where I stayed for full 3 days to recover. Baby and I were on antibiotics, different drips, fluids, painkillers.. all you can imagine At that point OH had to go home for a night and was coming back in the morning.. So it was tough to deal with physical weakness [couldn’t move for first day] and new born on your side.. But, looking at him I just forgot about everything in a second!

He is so beautiful, calm baby.. He doesn’t cry much for any reason, just when really something is not in his way.. I got so attached to him that I would sleep with him in one bed, having him hugged to my chest.. He is like best part of me, little treasure that sparkles our lives..

I ve decided to never get pregnant again but adopt in some few years.. Going so much overdue, I felt that my body doesn’t know how to deal with labor.. and Im pretty sure we would have died if the decision about C section hadn't been made...

So, I really dont wish ANYONE the same story..

All the best for you ladies!! As labour sucks, the reward afterwards is SOO BEAUTIFUL.. I love being a mom!!!!

Hugs..

How awful! I'd raise hell about it...I'm so glad you and LO are doing okay! None of that should have happened to you.

 

[annanouska]

that is such a terrible story all the way through reading it though I didnt think your LO was going to make it so I am really pleased he is doing ok

its terrible how you were treated, I hope you will put a complaint in to avoid other ladies having a similar experience.

wishing you both a speedy recovery xxxxx

 

[AC1987]

wow! What idiot doctors and staff that hospital must have. I'm SO sorry you had to go through all that. Sounds quite scary!! But I'm really happy baby and you are ok now!

 

[fairydust87]

What hospital is this?

 

[laylasmummy]

I had a terrible first delivery too and had awful recovery during which time I ended up on intensive care without my baby by my side, while i was in i got a superbug too which obviously threatened me more. I got post traumatic stress disorder and had a hard time coming to terms with what had happened. My daughter is now just 2 and im having my next (planned!!) c section 2 weeks tomorrow so people can get over traumatic births! x

 

[scotmum35]

im so sorry u were left to go so over due and left for so long after your waters broke nobody should have to go through such a traumatic experience as labour is scary when its pretty straight forward for a lot of women.
i agree with other posters that u should complain about your treatment.
im so happy tht your lil man is doing well and i hope u recover well also.congrats xx

 

[wantingagirl]

Im so sorry hun thats terrible..... its amazing some people can get away with this! xx

 

[babybrums]

How scary! I'm glad all was well in the end. I couldn't imagine being turned away. It's amazing how differently things are handled in different countries.

 

[lilmisslilly]

So sorry you had such a horrific experience I can believe how neglected you were by the staff. Congratulations though on your baby I'm so pleased everything worked out well in the end xx

 

[jaybee]

First of all congratulations on having such a healthy little man, remember the miracle of that.

I am so sorry you had such an ATROCIOUS experience it is not acceptable in any shape or form. I hope you are going to take it further and get the experience investigated and from the sounds of it there needs to be soe disciplinary going on.

Hugs to you and your wonderful new family. Xx

 

[puppycat]

I really think you should complain hun. It's good that you're both happy and well but it could have been so much more different and that's a scary thought

 

[Indigo77]

I'm glad you both made it.

The "care" you received was shamefully appalling and I'm sorry you had to go through that.

 

[babynewbie]

Im sorry you had such an awful time The way you were treated is horrific! I would definitely be putting in a massive complaint.

But huge congratulations on your little boy!! so glad you are both healthy and happy, enjoy your little family

 

[Iria]

thanks to all of you for support.

at the moment i try to not remember things as baby takes most of my time now and i just want to enjoy it.. but im thinking to write some sort of formal complaint and even try to write it to some newspaper..

hospital i was iin was st thomas hospital in central london, uk.

funny thing is that when i found out abt pregnancy i was registered at lewisham hospital but later, at 30 wks have transferred myself to st thomas as lewisham care sucked big times..
well.. there is no point to comment that i guess..

 

[fairydust87]

thanks to all of you for support.

at the moment i try to not remember things as baby takes most of my time now and i just want to enjoy it.. but im thinking to write some sort of formal complaint and even try to write it to some newspaper..

hospital i was iin was st thomas hospital in central london, uk.

funny thing is that when i found out abt pregnancy i was registered at lewisham hospital but later, at 30 wks have transferred myself to st thomas as lewisham care sucked big times..
well.. there is no point to comment that i guess..

I thought it would be St Thomas'. The home from home and birth centre seemed familiar. Thats my hospital where Im going to be giving birth. I hope the staff are better when my time comes

 

[pinklightbulb]

Oh hun That sounds horrifying. Glad you and baby are A-OK now though

 

[Clarehc]

That's such a bad story, I really feel for you. What a start to motherhood I really feel you were badly treated and neglected and when you feel stronger, I'd definitely make a complaint and speak to PALS. I bet you'll find your hospital notes do not reflect what you and your DH recall happening either - if you feel up to it, make yourself a set of notes with what you remember before some details fade.

I had a very traumatic first birth too (kind of similar to yours but not a section, forceps delivery after two day induced labour with the evil drip (which yes, does fail!)) and didn't bond with my DD for weeks so I think you're doing amazingly well. I really struggled once I got home and never established BF so it was tough. I also swore never to do it again but 5 years later, I'm a week away from an elective section. I decided not to even chance a second difficult delivery and the consultant agreed I could have a section. I feel much calmer about it - even though I think he might come early and ruin my plans, lol!

Don't worry about the future just now but if you feel you are struggling with bad memories (I couldn't even look at my DD's first baby photos for over a year), know you are not alone and it's normal. Hopefully you'll recover fine though, physically and mentally, and just enjoy your wee one

 

[beth_terri]

Im glad you and baby are all well now!

But f**king hell!! I cant believe how you were treated!! I seriously hope you complain about it as something dratically needs sorting out!!

xx

 

[Iria]

thanks to all of you for support.

at the moment i try to not remember things as baby takes most of my time now and i just want to enjoy it.. but im thinking to write some sort of formal complaint and even try to write it to some newspaper..

hospital i was iin was st thomas hospital in central london, uk.

funny thing is that when i found out abt pregnancy i was registered at lewisham hospital but later, at 30 wks have transferred myself to st thomas as lewisham care sucked big times..
well.. there is no point to comment that i guess..

I thought it would be St Thomas'. The home from home and birth centre seemed familiar. Thats my hospital where Im going to be giving birth. I hope the staff are better when my time comes

Well, I would say that situations like mine dont happen often, as St Thomas is well respected hospital, so my traumatic expierience was a big surprise to everyone.. I guess most of the problems [not all of them] were due to really busy time which is May.. but what I dont understand is why the hell they cant transfer ppl to others, less busy hospital and just neglect you as you were in the line for a newspaper, not in process of giving birth..
Also, another point what i ve noticed is that all really depends on what kind of ppl/staff you are going to have.. most decisions are made because this/that person said so.. giving an example from my post natal ward- I said I cant bf cause Soren just cracked completely my nipple and he doesnt want to drink from the other at all.. so i asked for ready to feed formula [i had mine, but there were different brand so they told me to not use mine].. and EACH midwife would respond differently to that question!!! because you feed baby every 2,3 hrs, i was going mad cause i knew each midwife had different opinion on giving me a damn formula!!! one said :" i will give you but first need to consult that with your midwife" yeah, it was 3 am, my son is screaming for food and she wants to have a chick chat with my midwife.. the other would say that "this is your decision and NO ONE can tell you NO! you have a right to choose not to bf.. "..
So it seems like its massive confusion abt lots of issues..

Anyway, i really wish you positive one down there.. hopefully they wont be busy this time..

All the best!