Irrational fear?

[Surreal]

So, I'm only about eleven weeks and three days along, but... I've developed a subconscious fear that when my baby is born, that a part of me will see him in my baby, and I'll hate a part of my baby because of it.

I don't want to hate this child, obviously, and even though I'm not that far along, I already adore this child. But I can't help but be so afraid that that will become an issue...

So, for any of you that already have your child... do you ever have moments where you look at your baby and go, "Oh heaven, they look so much like him..." and it just... hurts? Or, are you able to view that baby as someone else, without the link of FOB?

It seems like an irrational fear to me, because obviously a lot of you have gone on happily with your babies, and moved on with your life to one capacity or another... but subconsciously, it still scares me to death of the slight possibility...

 

[Laura2919]

Jaycee is her dads double! They look exactly the same but I love her loads and there isnt a part of her I hate. Or Chloe! I love them very much. Its a shame who their dad is but thats life! In an ideal world none of us would be single mums!
I am sure its just nerves and the fear of doing it on your own!
Hope these feelings pass hun

 

[teal]

This was something I worried about when I was pregnant. I wasn't sure how I would react if my baby looked liked a mini version of fob.

My son looks so much like me that I can't see fob in him at all. I'm not sure if that's because I choose not to see it though. I do see my son as his own person and I don't really associate him with fob - if that makes any sense at all.

 

[Surreal]

A part of me hopes that my baby looks more like me, then like him... but at the same time, FOB had pretty eyes... so, wouldn't be a bad trait to pass on to the kiddo.
I do hope it passes, too... I'm hoping I'll be able to look at my baby, and see it as my baby, instead of seeing FOB in my baby. :/ Would make for a bad experience... but, they do say the bond between a mother and her baby is like none other, so maybe I'll see FOB in it, but not give a damn, either.

Thank you both.

 

[Laura2919]

Your welcome! I think you will love your baby no matter what! So please dont worry too much!

 

[bloodbinds]

I'm lucky that everyone agrees Bella looks just like me!

But her eyes are her fathers, completely. And his eyes were the first thing i feel in love with, just deep, dark blue eyes, really intense and gorgeous.

I love my daughter (and her eyes!) and though when i look into them, i do see FOB sometimes, it doesn't make me hate her (though i hate him) i just think... how lucky she got his eyes and not his nose! Lol.

Don't worry, you will love your baby no matter if he is the complete double of your FOB. Promise x

 

[scottishgal89]

i worried about this when i was pregnant too hun but try not to worry
i think you'll love lo no matter what.
the only thing i see in my daughter of her 'dad' is her ears....the rest is all me.
after you have met lo and have bonded you will feel much better.
i know how you feel though and to be honest now i have her here i wonder what on earth i was worrying about because shes perfect to me and absolutely gorgeous
xx