joke time

[divershona]

okay im in need of a laugh today so whats the funniest thing that someone has said to you? or the funniest joke you've heard?

pregnancy related or not it doesnt matter lol

here is mine

girl asks doctor "how many calories are there in cum?" doctor says "believe me if you swallow no1 cares how fat you are!"

its not that funny now, but i nearly wet myself when i heard it for the first time

 

[amandad192]

okay im in need of a laugh today so whats the funniest thing that someone has said to you? or the funniest joke you've heard?

pregnancy related or not it doesnt matter lol

here is mine

girl asks doctor "how many calories are there in cum?" doctor says "believe me if you swallow no1 cares how fat you are!"

its not that funny now, but i nearly wet myself when i heard it for the first time

LMFAO
I had to tell my OH that. He laughed too.

 

[AnnabelsMummy]

okay im in need of a laugh today so whats the funniest thing that someone has said to you? or the funniest joke you've heard?

pregnancy related or not it doesnt matter lol

here is mine

girl asks doctor "how many calories are there in cum?" doctor says "believe me if you swallow no1 cares how fat you are!"

its not that funny now, but i nearly wet myself when i heard it for the first time

hahah!! says alot about men ayee!!

erm.. not the funniest one but..

- What is the most common pregnancy craving?
For men to be the ones, who get pregnant.

- What is colic?
A reminder for new parents to use birth control.

xx

 

[FayDanielle]

I heard this one recently, and it cracked me up!
Theres a file on my computer full of jokes somewhere from years ago!
I must find it!!

There was a guy who was struggling to decide what to wear to go to a fancy costume party... Then he had a bright idea.When the host answered the door, he found the guy standing there with no shirt and no socks on."What the hell are you supposed to be?" asked the host."A premature ejaculation," said the man. "I just came in my pants!"

 

[FayDanielle]

I think my post got deleted!
did I say something wrong?!!!

 

[FayDanielle]

Oh its back :/ wierd!!!
Lol x

 

[amandad192]

A man walks into a psychiatrist wearing cling film shorts.
"Well" said the doctor "I can see your nuts."

 

[AnnabelsMummy]

 

[divershona]

A man walks into a psychiatrist wearing cling film shorts.
"Well" said the doctor "I can see your nuts."

 

[Eabha'sMum]

Gymnast: The doctor says I can't do gymnastics.
Coach: Oh, he's seen you work out, too, huh?

Q. What's the difference between a gymnastics coach giving conditoning and a well-mannered professional torturer?
A. The torturer would apologize first.

Q. What's the difference between an gymnastics coach and a dentist?
A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you.

 

[divershona]

Gymnast: The doctor says I can't do gymnastics.
Coach: Oh, he's seen you work out, too, huh?

Q. What's the difference between a gymnastics coach giving conditoning and a well-mannered professional torturer?
A. The torturer would apologize first.

Q. What's the difference between an gymnastics coach and a dentist?
A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you.

are you a gymnast or interested in gymnastics? because those jokes r kinda funny to me but my sis is pissing herself with laughter (she does gymnastics) and she thinks they are brilliant, she's written them down to show the girls tomorrow at practice lol

 

[Eabha'sMum]

yeah i am a gym bum!! lol.... i have loads more, that she would understand...
xx

 

[Eabha'sMum]

Our coach got his job at the gym because of his answer to a question on the job application about what type of work his military service had prepared him for. His SAS cloak and dagger work trained him to be brutally honest and so he put down - Explosives, murder, arson and assassination. We found a note written in his employee folder by the owner - "Perfect for the elite squad girls"

 

[abbSTAR]

I heard this one recently, and it cracked me up!
Theres a file on my computer full of jokes somewhere from years ago!
I must find it!!

There was a guy who was struggling to decide what to wear to go to a fancy costume party... Then he had a bright idea.When the host answered the door, he found the guy standing there with no shirt and no socks on."What the hell are you supposed to be?" asked the host."A premature ejaculation," said the man. "I just came in my pants!"

 

[Green373]

Gymnast: The doctor says I can't do gymnastics.
Coach: Oh, he's seen you work out, too, huh?

Q. What's the difference between a gymnastics coach giving conditoning and a well-mannered professional torturer?
A. The torturer would apologize first.

Q. What's the difference between an gymnastics coach and a dentist?
A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you.

are you a gymnast or interested in gymnastics? because those jokes r kinda funny to me but my sis is pissing herself with laughter (she does gymnastics) and she thinks they are brilliant, she's written them down to show the girls tomorrow at practice lol

these totally cracked me up! i had to do tumbling thanks to cheer so i totally understand these hahah i love this thread!

 

[Eabha'sMum]

What are 3 reasons to date a gymnast? Flexibility, used to doing things on small surfaces, and can do things without looking.

My coach is the most even tempered man in the world - he's always mad

and... kinda a double slam for me...
What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

 

[divershona]

i like the 3 reasons to date a gymnast, my sister's response was we have brains too and are capable of holding a conversation !!!!!!!

i sarcasticly said yeah about gymnastics hehe ... i got a clip round the back of my head which i totally deserved i will admit hehe

 

[Eabha'sMum]

what level is she? xxx

 

[divershona]

no idea lol and she's away 2 bed ... i pretend im not interested otherwise all i hear all day is gymnastics lol, i know she's competed at regional level if that helps?

 

[Eabha'sMum]

lol! you should ask what level is she... and does she think the american TOPs system should be introduced into british gymnastics? lol... she will be astounded!

i love gymnastics! lol... i hada to check last week that i could still do the spilts, and a back spring... and a tuck, and an arabian... my mw would have a heart attack my coach near did! but i figure... if baby is gona insist on showing me how far she can stretch her legs, a tumbling session can't hurt!

and for those who think that is bad or whatever, and want to say it might have caused my abruption.... please don't

xx