just about ready to say weddings of!!

[halas]

so today i was just about ready to say my wedding's of because of my stubborn dad. he is being so selfish, he refuses to go to my wedding if i invite his ex wife who has been my step mum for 10 years and he also said that includes her daughter whos 15 she was going to be my bridesmaid we are really close and i really want them at my wedding but my dad who has been selfish all his life wont even let one single****ing day be about me and my fiance, sorry bout the language im just fumming and hurt, my mum talked to him for hours today about it telling him he should grow up and not be selfish for one day and he's reason for all this is as i quote: I DONT WANT THOSE PEICES OF SH!T RUINING MY DAY, so apparently my wedding day is not about me and my fiance and celerbrating our love but.... my dads day so he can use my wedding as a vengance against his ex wife because he knows it will hurt her more than anything she has been like a second mother to me her daughter is like a sister we have known each other sice she was 2 even tho shes younger she has always stood up for me when my dad was unreasonable she has always been there for me, i'm ready to just call my wedding of because the way its going it isnt going to be one of the best days of my life im not going to enjoy it its turning into a way for my dad to hurt his ex wife i keep crying about it i cant just choose them over my dad or visa versa he's giving me away i wud be torn apart if i let them go the wedding over my dad i cant take it anymore.

 

[Pinkgirl]

o hunni, i cant believe your Dad is acting like that.
He should realise that this is your day and he is totally spoiling it!
Iam not sure what to say, what has your OH said?
xx

 

[polo_princess]

I really hope he comes around for you hun

 

[halas]

thankyou for you're responses my oh isnt happy about it he recons my dads acting like a child and dosnt like how much it has hurt me last nite i went to bed and started crying and told oh i was freaking about the wedding bc im worried my wedding day being ruined i was ready just to back out of it, i doubt he will change his mind he is the stubbornist person you could ever meet gawd this sucks i hate that he is trying to involve me in his crap

 

[Mynxie]

sweetheart - stand your ground. Tell him that it's your day, not his, if he want's to be part of it you would very much love that, but the day isn't about him and his wishes.

 

[hypnorm]

Sorry but i would be harsh and say it is your day and YOU will invite who you like, and if he has a problem with that then he is welcome to stay at home and you will find someone else to take you down the isle.

I think you have to be brutal, if he really loves and cares for you he would put away his problems for one day.

 

[Sovereign]

I'm sorry he's being like this hun, it's you and your OH's day and no-one elses x

 

[PnutProtector]

that's terrible. but i agree with what others have said. You need to stand up to him and say that it's YOUR day and you will invite who you wish. If he really wants to share your day with you then he'll suck it up and if not, then you don't need him being there bringing you down.

I know it's tough. I'm going through a situation with my divorced parents and their respective families. None of them like each other and I am the only thing they have in common. I'm not sure my father will be attending my wedding. My mum is going to walk me down the isle anyways, so it's not a huge deal if he doesn't show.

 

[MrsP]

Oh hon, I know how you feel.

When it was our wedding, my dad was refusing to come unless I put his partner of 3 years on the top table. TO which we didn't and there was huge words. If he had been married or even with his partner for like 6-7 years+ I'd consider it but they had only been together 3 years.

Stick to your guns and although you don't derserve to have this grief he will more than likely come round. But you know what, it will be his loss and no one elses. My argument with my dad is out of all of the people that are coming which was like 100+ and you can't ignore 2 thats maks you very sad.

I hope things get better for you and don't be bullied, its your day x x

 

[Mynxie]

MrsP, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but what's the difference between 3 years or more? Just curious. I married my DH 3 years and 2 months after we met. Many people on here have children/are pregnant and haven't been with their partner for 3 years. I totally respect your judgement and your wishes etc, I'm just curious hun.

 

[halas]

thankyou again. im going to bring it up again a little later on maybe in time he will get over it my whole familys not affraid to let him know how disgusted they are. honestly his maturity is just like a childs

 

[sleepinbeauty]

bring it up in the middle of a huge family function--let them all rip into him!

I'm just kidding--but could you imagine??

 

[halas]

^^ i like ur thinking sleepinbeaty, yeah my dad seems to be loosing it found out what hes been up to and its sounds dangerous to, he got in a fight with heis ex wifes partner and then was waiting outside there work with a knife scares me what he will do next

 

[bigbloomerz]

Hun dont worry about it, I know how important it is to have your family there, but trust me it wont wreck your day if he isnt, My 3 brothers and my dad didnt come to my wedding due to religious reasons (i left a religion and they now no longer talk to me) and my mum died in 2001, I thought my heart would break on my wedding day with them all not being there, but thankfully I had true family and friends who did come and supported me the whole day that I hardly remembered about the others not being there!

My Father in Law walked me down the aisle, he gave me away and then took me back again lol.

Remember what the day is all about, its about you and your OH and if people want to make things awkward for you, just turn around and say "fine, dont come then, I can do without your shit" thats what I had to do with a few people, they didnt like it, but they got over it!
This is the one big day in your life where you are entitled to be selfish and do things the way you and your OH want!
Good Luck and I hope he stops being an arse and sorts himself out xx xx