Just received a solicitors letter

[KiansMummy]

Im so upset and angry! Received a letter from FOBS solicitor today. Saying that he has regular contact weekly for an hour at a time, supervised with LO (who is 4 months old and breast fed) , but he wants to have more time and take LO on his own. Ive always said to him that he can see LO as much as he wants, all he has to do is text me and ask if he can come and see him, ive said he cant take him on his own cos hes bf and hes not ready to leave me yet,. I dunno what to do, hes made me soo mad ! RANT OVER XX

 

[sweetlullaby]

Massive To be completely honest hun at 4 months old the max a judge is really gonna give any FOB is an hour a week supervised in your own home

I don't know maybe contact a solicitor yourself and get them to write a letter back saying that at 4 months old and breastfed your LO is hardly ready never mind you to be taken away from you and that you are willing as you've always said you are to up the contact every week just not unsupervised!

 

[KiansMummy]

Massive To be completely honest hun at 4 months old the max a judge is really gonna give any FOB is an hour a week supervised in your own home

I don't know maybe contact a solicitor yourself and get them to write a letter back saying that at 4 months old and breastfed your LO is hardly ready never mind you to be taken away from you and that you are willing as you've always said you are to up the contact every week just not unsupervised!

Ive made an appointment with a solicitor for next friday so will see what they say, hes threatened with it since lo was born but i always though he was all talk and never thought hed do it. Right before xmas as well x

 

[sweetlullaby]

I know exactly how you're feeling hun It's a real shock to your system getting a solicitor's letter For me it was a court summons back in april and he still hasn't seen LO yet just waiting on the next solicitor's letter coming (bet it'll be before xmas/LO's birthday etc)

 

[KiansMummy]

Is it a long process? X

 

[KiansMummy]

Is it a long process? X

Iv no idea what happens in these situations lol never known anyone to go down this line xx

 

[sweetlullaby]

I think you replied to your own post hun

For us we have had to get a dna test done etc because FOB wanted proof etc so it's been nearly a year in total but that includes waits with legal aid etc as well

 

[KiansMummy]

I think you replied to your own post hun

For us we have had to get a dna test done etc because FOB wanted proof etc so it's been nearly a year in total but that includes waits with legal aid etc as well

Oh right thanks , I want him go see lo in like a contact Center for the time being would they sort that oit or other arrangements xx

 

[sweetlullaby]

I was originally told contact centre but it'll be done in my own home with me there to supervise (somewhere LO is happy and comfortable in his surroundings etc) also a contact centre hun you arn't allowed to be in the room with FOB and LO and it's noly temporary until access moves onto unsupervised Though everywhere in the UK is different etc!

 

[Kate&Lucas]

I remember freaking out a bit when I got the letter from FOB's solicitor, thinking I'd have to comply with everything it said etc. Only difference was he'd never even asked to see LO, and suddenly he'd gone in demanding to see him 4 days a week!

Go see your own solicitor and see what she says, they'll contact FOB and his solicitors and try working something out. If he's adamant it may be that you get referred to mediation to agree on something, which tbh isn't nice but it's a much easier process than court.

Hope it goes okay chicken, don't let him intimidate you

 

[lou_w34]

Ohhh
I can only imagine how scary recieving that letter was, but try to remember that a solicitors letter is just a way for him to try and get what he wants, its not an order or something that you have agree too.

You need to get your own solicitor and make it clear what you are willing to offer, if he finds it reasonable then he will accept it, if he doesnt than it will go to mediation (if you both agree to this) then court, if he has the time and money to go to court then he will, otheriwse i doubt he will.

Usually solicitors letters are used as a way to scare you, but try not to let it, though i know that is easier said than done!

xxx