Keeping father away from daughter

[FlumpsMamma]

I've posted this a few places I just need some advice or to know if I'm right or wrong.

Hi all, please don't jump down my throat for this.

About 3 months ago my daughter came home telling me a very detailed story of how her father had left her home alone while he went to the shop. She told me that he had locked her inside his flat so he could get milk from the shop 5 mins away from his home. Obviously I made sure she was telling the truth and contacted her father who denied it all. I believe my daughter and refuse to send her back to his on a weekend incase it happens again. Shes only 5! I arranged for him to have supervised contact at his parents house a few weeks after she told me everything. The day before she was supposed to go she called him and told him this and that and he called her a lier and said I was forcing her to say these things or she was just a lier. I obviously hung the phone up for her as she was very upset and told him he was not seeing her the next day to say things like that to her face. I've heard nothing for 3 months and have told him not to contact me but I feel very guilty. My daughter adores her father but I can't risk it. He has never paid child support or done much for her but that's not too important. Am I right in stopping him till she is of an age she can look after herself for a hour or so? She knows why she isn't seeing him but still blames herself and thinks I'm just being mean... Im torn apart.

 

[Jennifurball]

I wouldn't risk it. My daughter's dad only sees her if his parents are there and if he does otherwise, I will hope/make sure my daughter tells me. Mine is only 4.

At that age they can still get into all sorts of danger, what if there was a fire? Not to mention she may have been terrified, not knowing when he was coming back. I am sick of useless dads acting like they have same rights when they put our kids in danger. Also, why didn't he bring her with him??

Your child comes first and if she is upset from her time with him then I wouldn't think twice about stopping it. The fact you haven't heard from him says it all really. x

 

[pink_phoenix]

I totally agree that your right in preventing him from putting her in danger. What an absolutely ridiculous thing to do. I'd have flipped my lid if that was me.
It's good that DD knows why she isn't seeing him tho. I understand it must make you feel guilty but i can't imagine anyone in their right mind would fine his behaviour acceptable. Also agree with the previous poster that clearly the fact he's not bothered in how ever many months tells you more than anything he could actually say.

Keep strong for your little girl. She will be glad of it one day and know you did everything in your power to keep her safe and happy

 

[Tropiclands]

You made the right decision. No one that young needs that type of fear on them. Flats also get cold this time of year.

 

[daneuse27]

You sound like a very caring and dedicated mom! It's hard to have kids 24/7 full time (without much time off from them going to their dads) but you are putting her safety and wellbeing first. He absolutely should not be leaving her alone at 5. At 10 years old, it might be alright for a short while, but not 5. I'm really sorry he's been so irresponsible with little regard for her safety. You're doing the right thing.