Hello everybody
I'm looking for advice,
My ex is currently in the processs of getting remarried & she has hinted that she wishes her new husband to adopt my son (she only told me about all this as I've been pushing for contact)
I have parental responsability & I've been paying maintainance for the last 5 years - but have had very little contact, this was due to the fact that when we split she moved 500 miles away (leaving me with all the debt) - over the years I've been struggling to clear it all while still paying for his upkeep (Which I finished clearling recently) & also an element of my own fault (Depressed/miserable & demotivated over the whole thing).
But now I've finally got the money to make the regular expensive journey & he is now at an age he would be able to interact with me (ie, visiting for his sake, not just my own) I wanted to start re-building a relationship with him.
I'm not opposed to him taking his mothers new partners name, or even him having parental responsability - what I am opposed to is losing my right to contact, on another note I also want to ensure I do what's best for him too.
On the surface me stepping back would probly be easier for him in the short-term ,but when he get's older & starts asking questions about his real father I'm sure it will get harder.
Frankly I feel a fool, as I've been very understanding when she's put me off visiting over the years (not that I could due to a lack of money), by implying he scared of strangers & still too young & it would be disressing for him.
Apologies for the wall of text,
John.
I'm looking for advice,
My ex is currently in the processs of getting remarried & she has hinted that she wishes her new husband to adopt my son (she only told me about all this as I've been pushing for contact)
I have parental responsability & I've been paying maintainance for the last 5 years - but have had very little contact, this was due to the fact that when we split she moved 500 miles away (leaving me with all the debt) - over the years I've been struggling to clear it all while still paying for his upkeep (Which I finished clearling recently) & also an element of my own fault (Depressed/miserable & demotivated over the whole thing).
But now I've finally got the money to make the regular expensive journey & he is now at an age he would be able to interact with me (ie, visiting for his sake, not just my own) I wanted to start re-building a relationship with him.
I'm not opposed to him taking his mothers new partners name, or even him having parental responsability - what I am opposed to is losing my right to contact, on another note I also want to ensure I do what's best for him too.
On the surface me stepping back would probly be easier for him in the short-term ,but when he get's older & starts asking questions about his real father I'm sure it will get harder.
Frankly I feel a fool, as I've been very understanding when she's put me off visiting over the years (not that I could due to a lack of money), by implying he scared of strangers & still too young & it would be disressing for him.
Apologies for the wall of text,
John.
