looking for some advice

[JoJo16]

i dont really post in here much but was hoping you would be able to give me some advice.
basically my little girl is 13 months old. fob has seen her twice and hasnt in over a year. last march we were going through mediation i went to my appointment hoping everything would be sorted, a few weeks later i got a letter saying that he had phoned and said he no longer wanted to attend mediation and that was the last thing i have heard from him. i heard nothing from him at xmas or her first birthday and none of his family have been in contact either. the last couple of months i have been wondering if i should contact him but i cant bring myself to do it, surely if he wanted to see her he would make the effort? now i wondering whether it would be worth going through the csa or just let him get on with it.
my main worry is that in a few years he might decide he wants to see LO but she wont have any idea who he is. i completely lost i dont know what to do for the best. what would you do?

 

[littlekitten8]

I am in a similar situation. FOB hasnt had any contact with LO for over a year. He is 16 months old and he last saw his father January of last year. I would say just leave him to it. He obviously doesnt want to see your daughter and its him that is losing out. You have done all you can short of taking him to court and they wont make him have contact if he doesnt want it.

 

[JoJo16]

I just don't understand because he was the one saying he was goin to take me to court to get more contact and then just out of the blue after causing me so much grief he decided he couldn't be bothered. I guess i will just have to leave him to it i just don't see how its fair him turning up in a few months or years or whatever if he does change his mind.

 

[chels24uk]

yeah just leave him to it. Its not fair them coming in and out as they please. If he does show up, i wouldnt let him see LO until he has proven he is serious about it as its not fair on the child. Hes the one missing out and hes the one who will live to regret it one day xx

 

[JoJo16]

Thanks for your replys i will just leave him to it. Like you said its him who is missing out and i did all i could. Thank you x

 

[Rhio92]

x

 

[billy2mm]

i would go to the csa.

he has a responsibility to financially support his child.

i wouldnt contact him though

 

[Mumof42009]

Like the others have said leave him to it, is the one who is going to lose out on the good stuff. My 2 oldest lo's have never had contact with there dad's and it's never bothered them xx

 

[purpledahlia]

I'd leave him to it aswell hun. If you'd asked about 6months ago id of said yes go for it, make contact for the childs sake, but having done it, and been let down and lied too, theres no point. It was a waste of time. If he wanted to be in touch he would be its as simple as that. you dont need him.

 

[JoJo16]

im gona leave him to it. he only lives 10 mins up the road so obviously not bothered atall. what am i supposed to do if in a few years or whatever he comes running back asking to see her? x