Looks like I'm going to be single mum of 2

[davidjoemum]

Hi
My boyfriend of 6 years and father of my both children announced today that he's leaving us.
He said he's done wasting his time family is not what he wanted we got two children David is 2.5 and he's recently been diagnosed with autism and Sophie is 1.5.
He can't stand them screaming and hate being father however he said he love us all to bits.
When David my son been diagnosed few weeks ago he said he feel embarrassed having child with autism. He said he want to go to America live with his mum and brother and we can keep the house and car.he owns outright house we living in and is on his sole name but he said he will transfer deed to my name so me and kids will feel safe that no his future wife or other kids on side will turn up wanting have rights to the house.
I am speechless I don know what to do I'm scared how I'm gonna make it.
I'm bending backward for our family and he dare to tell me he's fed up with me not getting groceries he wanted of for f,.,,,sake I'm paying for them so I'm buyi g what I can afford!
I also need to think about selling the car as I won't be able to afford running this one(. It's 4x4) I need something smaller
I need to think about surnames I have different one that my kids and I want to have the same one so I don't know should i change mine?(I'm foreign and my last name is very hard to pronounce) also will be cheaper to change mine than both kids.
I need personal opinion if he is leaving us the house would I give up child support? I think I should.
I'm really in the mess crying all day
Thanx for reading.

 

[Dezireey]

Woah, what an arsehole .So he thinks that just because life has given him problems and everything is not rosy and perfect for him right now, he can just walk out on his family like that? and he even has the gall to mention that he might have a future wife and more kids? (did I read that correctly?)

You know what you should do. let him go and never let him come back. You don't just walk out on your family like that and treat them as if they are a bloody sofa you bought from a store and you want to return it because it doesn't suit you and then bugger off and find another one? WTF?.

Some men just make me angry. They just opt out and walk away when it suits them, leaving the poor woman to not only look after the kids but try and manage everything else such as home, bills etc.

Be strong, be brave and just tell him 'okay, leave, once you walk out you are not welcome back and you go live with what you have done as I am the good, honest, reliable loving person staying here with my kids and bringing them up and loving them'

I swear to god sometimes, I don't know how half the population even functions properly without their Mothers bringing them up. Half the Dad's just want to opt out. Why do men these days keep seeing children as not their responsibility or an 'option' in life that they can change their mind about as and when they please? so weird.

You are a good mum and you will make it, you have to.

 

[Ceejay123]

.

 

[davidjoemum]

Thanx ladies according to him I have trapped him.
I never make him to do anything I left him when I was pregnant with my son for him cheating on me but he crawl back before my son wes born and we got back( maybe I took him cos i felt sorry for him ) and we had my daughter.
His mum and brother that's who is important to him every at least twice a week I'm hearing that is all my fault and I trapped him and he's wasting his time he never wanted this he's miserable and yesterday he said he's done wasting more time because he's only 25.
Later last night he came and he said he love us and he do t want to leave wtf?
I'm done i just want my kids to have this house for them because i know when he leave and I won't fight for it kids will get nothing but his future wife will(yes you read that correctly )
He promised me marriage and all that shit now I'm single mother of 2 on the shelf but I'm loving the thought that I won't be hearing his moaning every second day.

 

[aqualung]

Davidjoemum:
He wants to move to the USA to live with his MOTHER? Heisman ditching his responsibilities and running off to mommy? How will you get child support from a man who resides in a different country. Any CS order might be tough to enforce Internationally. Could he losehis visa or passport for non-payment?

Giving him 2 kids based on his promise to marry you one day eventually perhaps == short-sighted.

Sorry about the autism diagnosis. Its cause is a great medical mystery of our time. Were you on antidepressants during gestation? While breastfeeding?

Tell FOB to keep his house & both of his kids. Then return to your home country. He will appreciate your contributions more after carrying the load alone for a few weeks.

 

[davidjoemum]

Davidjoemum:
He wants to move to the USA to live with his MOTHER? Heisman ditching his responsibilities and running off to mommy? How will you get child support from a man who resides in a different country. Any CS order might be tough to enforce Internationally. Could he losehis visa or passport for non-payment?

Giving him 2 kids based on his promise to marry you one day eventually perhaps == short-sighted.

Sorry about the autism diagnosis. Its cause is a great medical mystery of our time. Were you on antidepressants during gestation? While breastfeeding?

Tell FOB to keep his house & both of his kids. Then return to your home country. He will appreciate your contributions more after carrying the load alone for a few weeks.

I was on antidepressant during pregnancy with my son due to high stress thanx to fob.

 

[aqualung]

I was on antidepressant during pregnancy with my son due to high stress thanx to fob.

Maybe one day soon there'll be a class action lawsuit for similarly situated moms and kids. Be sure to join the class.
https://blogs.plos.org/blog/2012/06...-autism-and-a-problematic-research-premise-2/

 

[babycrazy1706]

Sorry you are going through this
Get that house in your and your kids names and get child support set up!!

Big hugs. be strong. Xx

 

[Desi's_lost]

Davidjoemum:
He wants to move to the USA to live with his MOTHER? Heisman ditching his responsibilities and running off to mommy? How will you get child support from a man who resides in a different country. Any CS order might be tough to enforce Internationally. Could he losehis visa or passport for non-payment?

Giving him 2 kids based on his promise to marry you one day eventually perhaps == short-sighted.

Sorry about the autism diagnosis. Its cause is a great medical mystery of our time. Were you on antidepressants during gestation? While breastfeeding?

Tell FOB to keep his house & both of his kids. Then return to your home country. He will appreciate your contributions more after carrying the load alone for a few weeks.

I was on antidepressant during pregnancy with my son due to high stress thanx to fob.

Don't start thinking that was the cause, there's no point grasping at straws as to what "caused" the autism diagnosis. Specially not if those straws point to something you did cos you need feel no blame for it. Many people who have never been on anti depressants have children with autism and plenty of people who took them during pregnancy have autism-free children.

I would still seek child support even with him signing over the house because he's still abandoning his family like a coward. Besides, if he hates kids so much..why would he have them in the future. What a loser.

All will be okay in the end, chin up mama.

 

[WantingABubba]

I don't know the answers to your questions but I just wanted to say that I am so sorry! xxx

 

[daneuse27]

Your FOB is pathetic and a coward to be walking out on you and your two children
You can legally get child support from him, even though you're in a different country. Just because he's moving to another continent doesn't exempt him from his obligations to financially provide for his children!