M newborn hates me right? sad.

[Keza]

Ok so my little girl turned 7 weeks on Saturday since then she has been a nightmare at my home crying, constantly unsettled doesn't feed well and wont sleep. BUT here is the confusing thing shes been to my parents twice this week so I can get a break from the incessant crying and she is a dream there. No crying lots of sleeping and feeding well. Shes very content there. Soon as I bring her through my front door screaming commences. Im at the end of my tether and me and my parents cant figure it out. Both of our homes are at a good temperature and my mum has duplicate of everything I do including bottles teats milk etc etc. What the hell is causing this other than my child actually cant stand me.

 

[Quartz]

Shall I tell you the easiest experience I have ever had settling a baby with no tears and no feeding. It was not one of my own, it was a friends 2 week old baby. It wasnt that it suddenly became easier, she was easier or I did something different. I realised it was simply that I was totally relaxed, I was visiting and my DD was playing happily with her best friend, I didnt have chores to do that were backed up or the desperate need for a shower. No all I had to do was enjoy baby cuddles. And so what if she cried or became difficult I could simply hand her back to her mum. So I was calm and relaxed and she picked up on it and was a dream.

So I imagine at your parents they have everything under control (and know that they can hand her back). If it becomes too much they can call you. You by your own admission are stressed and at the end of your tether - and that I feel is likely to be the difference and what she picks up on.

As to how to solve it, you are her mum she loves you so believe that and relax and enjoy. Also when she is at your parents do they also have your son?

 

[Willow01]

Oh hun big hugs to you. A similar thing is happening to my friend right now, her newborn is completely happy and content in the arms of her grandmother but screams her head off when with mum. She has even called the granny round to the house in the early hours simply because she has had enough. But I agree with pp, by now it will be the first thing you think about when you wake in the morning and I guess from there your stress grows throughout the day. Babies pick up on this and if you are feeling this way she will sense it and get stressed herself. Is there any chance that you could maybe have some alone time with your baby, and all you focus on is her and build your bond even stronger? She honestly doesn't hate you, you are her mum and she loves you, she just knows you are stressed and doesn't know how to deal with itx

 

[Keza]

Yeah this could be the only reason I guess. It crossed my mind also but im not sure how to fix it. My son will sometimes stay with my parents with Belle but will sometimes stay with me.

 

[citrusfruit]

Had to reply. Until my baby was about 8/9 weeks, he regularly screamed at me but not at my husband. It made me so so sad like I was doing something wrong and really knocked my confidence. At about 5 weeks, we took him for a photoshoot and the photographer told my husband to hold him at all times as babies always play up for their mums as they can smell milk. That's all they really care about at that age. Even if you aren't breastfeeding, your scent will remind baby of feeding.

I'm sure that's all it is and it will settle soon.

 

[citrusfruit]

Also, sometimes they just like a change of scenery. I know it's hard but try to get out and about as much as you can. This very difficult phase will pass soon enough.