Making myself a little crazy ttc #1

[JMO2]

Hi everyone!
Just signed up because I've been feeling like I need someone to vent to. My husband is very "when it happens it will happen" about the whole ttc thing. So he doesn't always understand my anxieties, etc. We've been trying for 3-4 months now. I've been trying to not tell him too much about the "technical" aspects of ttc. The cm, and when I ovulate, etc. Because I don't want the "spark" to go away from us, and make it feel like a chore. I also don't want to give him performance anxiety? Lol but anyways, I've been on bc for probably a good 8-10 years now. I used to get my period all the time, kinda opposite of what it should be... So my dr put me on it, and it's been working fine so far. I got off bc 4 months ago now and we started trying right away. Obviously with bc I had a normal 28 day cycle. So my first cycle off bc was longer, 39 days. (Of course I took a test, hoping, but not feeling any symptoms.. Got a bfn) my next cycle was 33 days. I also started using opk that month, and it said I was at peak 25 days into my cycle.... Then I got my period a week or so later.. Which I know they say your period should come about 2 weeks later... So could the opk have been wrong?!? This next cycle, the opk said I was ovulating on cycle day 14. About a week or so later, I had a day where i had cramps for like an hour or two. and that was it. I also noticed brushing my teeth a couple of days, there was a little blood, but nothing crazy. If I go by my last cycle, and the number of days, i would be ovulating when I was cramping, (if I go by the whole 2 weeks later I get my period)... So not sure if the opk was right again this month?.... I am making myself crazy. Now I'm wondering if I should just start temping. The other big thing I am a little worried about is that I am in my brother-in-law's wedding the end of sept. 2015...I'm nervous we are going to get pregnant finally (yay! Hopefully) and then be due on their wedding day! Ugh. Just one more stupid thing to worry about.
So I geuss my question to you all after this very long and winded rant, is; can opk's be wrong?? And what should I do about the wedding?... Should we stop trying for a couple of months?...
😩😁

Thanks so much for reading and listening. Hope this all makes sense.
Baby Dust to you all!!

 

[zoeh]

OPK's aren't usually "wrong" about detecting an LH surge unless they're defective, BUT they can detect an LH surge and you might not actually ovulate afterward; they can't tell you if you actually ovulated. Your body can gear up to O several times throughout your cycle and not actually do it. It's possible that you have a luteal phase defect (ovulation to period <10 days), but you won't know that unless you confirm O somehow (temping, ultrasound, or progesterone levels) and then see if your period comes ~12-14 days later. You might have some anovulatory cycles with LH surges or be picking up a later "fake-out" surge than the one when you actually ovulate. Do you take the OPK's throughout your cycle or start on a certain day? It might be worth doing them earlier if possible to see if that changes things. Temping would probably be your best bet to actually see if/when you ovulate, though.

Personally, I wouldn't worry about the wedding--planning TTC around events seems like it just adds to the anxiety of the whole thing, and there are *always* more events--but maybe that's just because after TTC 15 months, I couldn't care less if I got pregnant and were due on a family member's coronation day ;-). If you think your brother/family would be upset if that happened (and it's not a certainty that it would happen yet... maybe you're destined for an October baby ), then I suppose you could try to take a break from actively trying, but unless you go back on bcp, you could end up pregnant anyway!

 

[JMO2]

Thanks so much for getting back to me. Maybe I'll start temping and see what happens. I've started opk's a week or so before I thought I would be ovulating, and the first time I got an open circle for 3 days, a flashing smiley face, then the next day a solid smiley face. This past month, I got 3 days of open circle and then one day with a solid smiley. The day before the solid smiley I did have to get up super early to go to work, (4 am), so I am thinking it just didn't register the blinking smiley yet that day. But anyways. Best of luck to you!! &#128512;

 

[ksquared726]

Hi! I'm not much help with the OPKs because last month was the first time I used them, and the ones I bought were just terrible. They were the Equate brand with blue dye and the day I think I ovulated, the line was just slightly fainter than the control line so technically it was a negative. I bought a ton of Easy@Home ones from Amazon because they had good reviews and were really inexpensive, so hopefully these are much clearer.

I'm with you on the long cycles! Mine are 6 weeks and a couple of days each time, and steadily getting longer. Sounds like yours are trying to shorten. If you can, try to have sex pretty regularly throughout your whole cycle. Like every other or every third day, if you can. In the beginning my husband had the philosophy of "it will happen when it happens" too, but because of my long cycles and going 3 cycles of it NOT happening, he now listens to all of my symptom spotting and TMI rants and speculation, lol. He knows it's stressful for me and says I can talk to him about anything because we're in this together. I think he thought it would happen quicker than this too. He says I can jump him whenever I want - and we try to make it fun and not feel like a chore. I don't mention TTC right before or after if I can help it!

I agree - I wouldn't worry about your brother's wedding. It probably won't be an issue. But, if you can't help worrying then just use condoms for a month. It could still happen, but the risk is a lot lower.

Good luck!

 

[rcp216]

I have learned that digital OPKs can sometimes be wrong -- for example if the test strip is flooded. I googled and was able to find pictures of what the test strip lines should look like -- I think this is good to be aware of so that you can double check the results you get on the digital read. Makes me feel a little bit more in control than just waiting for a smiley face and seeing that empty circle instead!

I would definitely recommend charting, because a jump in basal temp is the only think that confirms ovulation. The positive OPK only confirms an LH surge, not actual ovulation. If you starting charting, you can also determine the days from ovulation to AF (usually 12-14 days, and will stay regular). I use the Kindara app on my iphone to chart and really like it. It has been super helpful since I also came off BC after 10 years and now am dealing with very irregular cycles.

 

[cutestuff]

I don't personally relate to the longer cycles but like others have said, the only way to detect ovulation is through temping or if your cycle is relatively normal. I think the range is between 25-35 days between each cycle with an average of 28. I am not sure if this will help, but other people's posts have spoken about b vitamins and if you get a b-complex- it will come with folic acid which is good for the first months of pregnancy. I would also chart a few more months so when you see a doctor you are more aware of the changes your body makes. I would assume the test was correct and research ways to help lengthen your leutal phase???? Sorry I couldn't be more help...

 

[MrsHudson]

I don't use OPK's for the very reason you're talking about. I think it would stress me out far more than I need to be. Like PP said, I would start temping and tracking CM. Temping will help you better understand when you O or if you're not at all. Also, OPK's can tell you that you are O when it's already too late.

In regards to the wedding, I would not even worry about that! That is way more thought then needs to be put into it and if you really want a LO then that shouldn't matter.

 

[crazycatlady5]

The opk and cm and temping all confuses me too, I just try to bd a lot for the couple weeks around when I'd be most likely to be fertile, hopefully that works, if not I guess I'll have to get more technical.

I'm in the same predicament as you, supposed to be a bridesmaid in a wedding at the very end of next August, so if this cycle gives me a bfp not sure how that will work out! So I just decided that really there's never going to be a perfect time and we want a baby (and I'm not getting any younger unfortunately... Hehe) so it would just be what it is and we'll figure it out and be happy if if happens... Hope that advice helps ?

 

[sweetB]

I agree with the advice above! I suggest:
1. start temping BUT don't get too stressed about analyzing the charts until you have at least two cycles charted. I went of BCP and my first 2-3 months of charts were confusing and led me to get a little depressed (no ovulation on either of them!). But it got better, and now I understand them more after 5 months of charting.
2. I suggest the Wondfo OPKs on Amazon, which are less expensive which means you can test for more days before running out. I noticed with these, I will get a light line that gets darker until it is a full positive. That gives me a little warning.
3. Continue to have sex a few days after your + OPK or fertile cm. This took me a while to realize!

This cycle I'm also trying drinking grapefruit juice to build up my cm, eating sunflower seeds, using pre-seed lube, and using the instead cup after sex (I figure these might not work for everyone but can't hurt!). Hopefully you'll get your BFP soon so you won't have to stress about charting and all this business