CapitalChick
Mommy to 1 and preggo!!!
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2007
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To feel better during my TTC journey.
This afternoon we went to see some friends for lunch. They have an adorable 6 month old baby. I was hemming and hauing over whether to ask the wife (I consider them friends, but we're not SUPER close to discuss personal stuff...) about TTC and how long it took her. I thought "gee, they were married for a couple years before getting pregnant...maybe she struggled to get pregnant". Finally, I worked up the courage and asked her how long it took her to conceive. She quickly counted in her head and said "ten months". I said "wow...that's long, eh?" and she shrugged and said "yeah...I guess...it was a bit of time to wait". I asked her if she was really depressed and she smiled and said "Well, I once read that it can take a healthy couple up to a year.....or maybe I remember reading that the average couple takes a year....I can't remember....but anyway, I figured I wouldn't worry too much until the one year mark".
I thought "HOLY MOLY! I wish I was like you!". I felt silly telling her that we have been TTC for 4 months, but when I told her, she was super sympathetic. She said that an elderly man whom she respected very much once gave her some unsolicited advice. As her and her husband had been leaving his home, he said "By the way...I hope you one day have a beautiful family with lots of children....And while you're trying to make that family, please have NO stress or worries. Stress and worries are bad!"
She said that somehow his words really calmed her.
Anyway, I feel SO much better after talking to her. I'm not saying that I won't feel depressed again...I might even feel depressed tomorrow!...But seeing her just shrug and say "It took us ten months to conceive our first" and to think/know that that was fine and normal...it just made me put things into perspective.
I hope that some of you will find this comforting too.
This afternoon we went to see some friends for lunch. They have an adorable 6 month old baby. I was hemming and hauing over whether to ask the wife (I consider them friends, but we're not SUPER close to discuss personal stuff...) about TTC and how long it took her. I thought "gee, they were married for a couple years before getting pregnant...maybe she struggled to get pregnant". Finally, I worked up the courage and asked her how long it took her to conceive. She quickly counted in her head and said "ten months". I said "wow...that's long, eh?" and she shrugged and said "yeah...I guess...it was a bit of time to wait". I asked her if she was really depressed and she smiled and said "Well, I once read that it can take a healthy couple up to a year.....or maybe I remember reading that the average couple takes a year....I can't remember....but anyway, I figured I wouldn't worry too much until the one year mark".
I thought "HOLY MOLY! I wish I was like you!". I felt silly telling her that we have been TTC for 4 months, but when I told her, she was super sympathetic. She said that an elderly man whom she respected very much once gave her some unsolicited advice. As her and her husband had been leaving his home, he said "By the way...I hope you one day have a beautiful family with lots of children....And while you're trying to make that family, please have NO stress or worries. Stress and worries are bad!"
She said that somehow his words really calmed her.
Anyway, I feel SO much better after talking to her. I'm not saying that I won't feel depressed again...I might even feel depressed tomorrow!...But seeing her just shrug and say "It took us ten months to conceive our first" and to think/know that that was fine and normal...it just made me put things into perspective.
I hope that some of you will find this comforting too.
