Missing my mom. Pregnancy emotions on overdrive....

[ashleyg]

Not sure if this goes on this bored? But it's pregnancy related so I thought I'd post it here.

I've just been so emotional lately. I lost my mom in October and when I found out that I was pregnant I literally cried for an hour after I saw the test. I just sat there and cried my eyes out for a hour straight. All I wanted to do was call her! It's been so so hard going through all this not being being able to ask her questions or tell her everything that's going on

I get so depressed when I think that I won't be able to go baby shopping with her and enjoy all the things that you're supposed to with your mom

I always miss her but I feel like my symptoms are on overdrive now! Any time I think about her or talk about her I get so choked up and I could burst out in tears righ then and there!

On top of that, everything else in life makes me cry too! And I mean everything. I'm nervous about everything being okay with the baby and I feel so lonely because I can't really tell anyone right now. I know my hubby is supportive and so is my dad but I don't really have another woman to talk to about all of this and it makes me feel so upset and emotional. I just want to sit on the couch and cry and be left alone all day

Sorry for the pitty party but I needed to type it out for someone to read!

 

[Nataliieexo]

I can relate i lost my mam in november i was 8 weeks pregnant, she knew and she got to come to a scan because i had to get a early scan she held my hand when i was lying on the bed this was 6 weeks pregnant. She passed away unexpectedly and i miss her so much, i cry i lie in bed at night thinking what ifs, i dont sleep til late because of it. It upsets me that she wont meet my baby and instead i will have to tell baby how amazing and brave she was. I miss her face, her voice everything about her its so hard im feeling depressed to but im to scared to tell the doctors incase they brand me a bad mam already and take my baby at birth, all that motivates me is baby and baby shopping its the only time my mind doesnt drift off. I am going to start going to councilling on monday hoping that will help. I cant talk to anyone else i just cant open up and i feel alone most of the time. I fear something will happen to my baby because my mam was took away from me so i am constantly paranoid :'( x

 

[ashleyg]

I can relate i lost my mam in november i was 8 weeks pregnant, she knew and she got to come to a scan because i had to get a early scan she held my hand when i was lying on the bed this was 6 weeks pregnant. She passed away unexpectedly and i miss her so much, i cry i lie in bed at night thinking what ifs, i dont sleep til late because of it. It upsets me that she wont meet my baby and instead i will have to tell baby how amazing and brave she was. I miss her face, her voice everything about her its so hard im feeling depressed to but im to scared to tell the doctors incase they brand me a bad mam already and take my baby at birth, all that motivates me is baby and baby shopping its the only time my mind doesnt drift off. I am going to start going to councilling on monday hoping that will help. I cant talk to anyone else i just cant open up and i feel alone most of the time. I fear something will happen to my baby because my mam was took away from me so i am constantly paranoid :'( x

I'm so sorry about you mom. They wouldn't take your baby away from you! At least she got to be there with you for the ultrasound
I'm trying not to become too down because I want to be able to enjoy my pregnancy but it is hard going through it and not having her here to go through it with me.

 

[mara16jade]

Huge ashleyg!!!!!

I'm so sorry about your mom. Losing your mom has to be one of the hardest things to ever go through in life. Lean on your dad, and maybe you could ask him what he remembers about your mom being pregnant with you. Have him tell you stories.

 

[ashleyg]

Huge ashleyg!!!!!

I'm so sorry about your mom. Losing your mom has to be one of the hardest things to ever go through in life. Lean on your dad, and maybe you could ask him what he remembers about your mom being pregnant with you. Have him tell you stories.

Thanks lovely

I've tried to ask him but he doesn't remember anything lol. Men
I talked to her quite a bit before she passed away about her pregnancy and I try to remember what she told me but there are so many times I wish I could just pick up the phone and call her.

 

[Nataliieexo]

I really enjoy mine even though im down about i just think about what a blessing my baby is i had a early miscarriage in august so i treasure all these moments and i think my baby will be just like my mam more so if i have a girl he/she will be perfect as my mam was. And you baby will be also. I am so sorry for your loss and i know there is no words to describe how you are feeling. I hope you have a very happy and healthy pregnancy. If you ever need to talk im only a pm away x

 

[Paperhearts]

My heart breaks for you and I am so so sorry you're feeling this heartache.

 

[wannanewbaby]

Im so sorry for your loss i cannot imagine. And you shouldnt feel bad about getting chocked up talking about her i know i would to. It totally makes sense being upset everyone wants there mom there for these things my mom lives far away so she cant come to appt or shop with me but at least i can call her. Again so sorry for your loss cant imagine just rest and take the time yoy need to greive.

 

[ashleyg]

I really enjoy mine even though im down about i just think about what a blessing my baby is i had a early miscarriage in august so i treasure all these moments and i think my baby will be just like my mam more so if i have a girl he/she will be perfect as my mam was. And you baby will be also. I am so sorry for your loss and i know there is no words to describe how you are feeling. I hope you have a very happy and healthy pregnancy. If you ever need to talk im only a pm away x

I'm enjoying beig pregnant. We've wanted a baby for a while is it's such a blessing. And I know she wouldn't want me to stress or be upset that she isn't here but it's hard. Especially when your hormones are ten times crazier than before.
Thanks so much love

 

[ashleyg]

My heart breaks for you and I am so so sorry you're feeling this heartache.

Thank you lovely.

 

[ashleyg]

Im so sorry for your loss i cannot imagine. And you shouldnt feel bad about getting chocked up talking about her i know i would to. It totally makes sense being upset everyone wants there mom there for these things my mom lives far away so she cant come to appt or shop with me but at least i can call her. Again so sorry for your loss cant imagine just rest and take the time yoy need to greive.

Thank you. I know I shouldn't, but it happens multiple times a day where I just feel like bursting into tears. My poor husband I'm sure is stressed because he can't fix it. I've been relaxing and I'm trying not to over stress and to not get too down because I don't want any of this to affect the baby xx