my 13 year old wants the implant help !!!!!

[mummy0704]

hi my 13 year old (14 in august ) has just got herself her first real boyfriend, hes 15. now my daughter looks a lot older 15/16, any how she has asked today if she can have the contreception implant, she's already on the pill due to heavy periods but thats all it was for, now shes asking for this i really dont know what to do or say ? any advice would be welcomed x x

 

[MoonMuffin]

Well I don't have a teen (yet) but consider this: I fell PG with my daughter by missing just one Pill (which I took the next day along with the other like your supposed to), and I fell PG with John even though we were using condoms (no idea how that one happened lol, though of course I love them both so much but I'm 20, not 13)
My point is, better safe then sorry. If she wants to mess around with her BF she'll find a way to do it (trust me!). I'd ask her why she wants it, agree to have her get it but tell her how you really don't want her having sex because she's so young and that its not something she should feel pressured into doing, etc. Just explain that you understand that she's serious about her boyfriend (even if you don't think it will last she might and you don't want to dismiss that) but he needs to respect that she's young and isn't ready for sex yet.
I hope that helps some, I'm so not looking forward to this whole subject when Kathryn is older.

 

[faun]

I think its great that your daughter feels able to talk to you about things like this she could have just done it and not spoken to you about it. Yes 13/14 is young to be thinking about sex but if she is going to be fooling around even if they don't have penetration there is still a tiny risk she could get pregnant or get swept up and do it anyway. My point is its better for her to be safe then have a baby at 14 and it is very sensible of her to be thinking about birth control. Just make sure you let her know if she does have sex she needs to use a condom as well so she doesn't get an STI.

 

[Justagirlxx]

Does your daughter understand that the pill protects her from getting pregnant? The reason I ask is that I wonder why she would want the implant? For convience or because she wants to be "extra" protected? I would just ask her about it and also please look up the side effects and risks of the implant. It's alot more hormones than the pill and sometimes things go wrong with that (I've heard it can break in your arm and the drip lets all the hormones out at once which can be fatal) I'm not a doctor but being so young I dont think she needs any more hormones than just the normal pill iykwim. Also I think its great that she can talk to you about this, I couldnt talk to my mom at all. The only bad thing you could do at this point is to not talk to her about it when she has opened the subject for you, most likely intentionally but too afraid to actually ask about sex. I wish my mom would have been there for me to talk to because I was pressured into having sex as a young teenager by my boyfriend and no matter what they say nowadays I do not think that sex this young is healthy for kids.

 

[Parkep]

I think the fact that your daughter feels comfortable asking you, is awesome! I personally would take her in to go talk to the doctor about it. See what he/she says aka risks, side effects, whether he/she thinks its a good idea ect. And to remind her even with the implant/Birth control she must always use a condom. Your daughter sounds very bright. Yes she is young, but unfortunately girls are having sex a lot younger than i remember

 

[hellohefalump]

I think it's amazing, and shows you're definately a good mum, that your daughter feels able to talk to you about it. If it were me, I'd let her get the implant because if she wants to have sex, she's going to do it anyway whether or not you approve. All you can do is try to guide her.

 

[mummy0704]

thanks everyone for your advice, going to sit down with her and have a chat once little ones in bed.

 

[morri]

In any way, Have you asked her whether she would have different non hormonal birthcontrol? there is the IUD which is in a size for teenagers and others that didnt have had a pregancy yet. this way the hormones aren't messed around more that they already are.

 

[louise1302]

how fantastic that your daughter feels comfortable enough to discuss contraception with you at such a young age(my mum would have flipped)
i think although the legal age for consent is 16 some kids are old headed and are going to do it no matter what you say or do, i would let her get the implant but also educate her some on stds and avoiding them although im sure shes probably pretty clued up already maybe a trip to the fp clinic to discuss all her options and pick up a job lot of free condoms?

 

[hopeandpray]

i have the implant, got it at 18 and it's been great for me. i worry about all the hormones with having that and taking the pill. imo she is too young to be having sex but if she wants to i guess she's better off being safe. maybe talk to her about how there is more involved with having sex than just the risk of pregnancy, its a big emotional stress for someone so young

 

[mummy0704]

hi thanks for all your replies i have spoken with her and we have an appointment at family planning clinic to discus everything thursday morning x x x

 

[cabaretmum2b]

Fantastic, I'm glad you're coming to an agreement. Yes, she is too young to be having sex, but better to be safe than sorry! I also think it's really, really lovely that she can talk to you about things like that, you've obviously got a really good relationship

 

[KA92]

I think that's great that she came to
you. If she going to have sex shel do
it with or without your knowledge. I first had sex at 14
but used condoms.
At least talking to the docs means she has a
better choice of contraception too. It sounds
you two are really close and that's great . Good
luck!xx

 

[mommy43]

im in a similar situation my daughter is 14 at the end of this month n has asked for an implant i think the fact that she is able to come to me is brilliant n shows a degree of responsibility about sex i made her aware that even if she has an implant she will still need to use condoms to protect herself against sti's yes they are very young but u cant be with them 24/7

 

[InvisibleRain]

I honestly like the fact that she asked you hun! I remember when my OH and I were ready. I almost secretly went and got the pills myself; but i love my mum too much and i went and asked her and cancelled the docs appointment. It's good to know she could ask you hun. If she believes shes ready (hopefully no preasure from the bf) I think you should be more safe than sorry hun remember what it was like for us back then! (god i feel old! lol im only 23 )

I don't have a Teen, i just remember being one

 

[mummy0704]

hi everyone, well she had it put in on thursday had a good talk with doc about stds etc, also said shes not ready yet for sex, just yet but would rather be safe when she does, thankyou all for been so understanding its been a big help x x

 

[Lullaby2009]

Only just seen this thread, would like to say how fantastic it must be from her point of view to have such a wonderful and understanding mum that she can be open and honest with! Kudos to you for being such a great and supporting mum! She obviously appreciates the closeness you share and will remember this in years to come xx

 

[jaytee.]

I'm a teenager myself, and I know friends of my age that have got the implant whilst being a in a relationship, only for that relationship to break up. The implant should really be for people that are in really long term relationships because it's in there for 3 years, putting hormones into your body and if it's not used it's pretty pointless. And really it shouldn't be needing use at 13 years old, that's 3 years underage and I think it's great that she is willing to talk to you and ask you about sex but she should be discouraged from becoming sexually active, mistakes can happen and imagine if she were to fall pregnant at that age, it would be devastating. Honestly, she is more likely to wait until 16 if you talk to her about it, that's what happened with me. Also, most Dr's wouldn't be happy to give an implant to a 13 year old, even my friends who were 16/17 needed to persuade them.

Good luck!

 

[jaytee.]

Oh, I just read up.. my mistake! Surely if the implant lasts three years it would need to be replaced my then anyway? :/

 

[QuintinsMommy]

you sound like such a good mom!
its great she wants to be safe just in case.