My ds,his friends & a text

[Mama Duck]

Hello I'll make this as brief & as clear as possible so please bear with me!

Yesterday my 12yo ds was out with his friend and whilst out bumped into another couple of boys,all friends bar one (same age,same school) and at some point some jostling took place along with some name calling between all 4. My ds came home just before 4.30pm. At 4.45pm I received a text from the mother of one of the boys mum asking me is I could speak to my ds regarding what took place. This mother had took it upon herself to phone and then text my ds before speaking to me. I am friends with this mother.

I saw the texts she sent my ds and I am less than impressed - a grown woman saying 'you don't want to have to deal with me do you?" and "I am happy for ***** (her ds) to sort you out himself". I spoke to the mother saying that it was far from acceptable that she should be texting him,less than threatening him - she said she wasn't threatening him,was just upset. I explained that I wasn't happy that she didn't contact me first which is what she should have done.

I'm still not 100% sure on what actually happened or what she expects me to do. She has also contacted one of the other boy's mum and was going to contact the 3rd. The other mum is just as baffled over it as I am. My ds was the only one who was contacted personally and tbh I'm more concerned about that than I am over everything else. She said she hopes it will blow over by the time they all go back to school (8th Jan) but if it doesn't she will 'deal with it' - again is that a threat?

She is not an aggressive lady,very placid,have known her for a good few years so I have no idea what has tripped her over the edge. My ds is no angel and certainly nor is her ds. What boy is eh!

I personally think she has blown it all out of proportion. I have explained to my ds that he shouldn't be name calling and that there is fault on all parts.

As far as I'm aware all the boys are still friends,no major harm has been done. My ds said they were all having fun.

Thank you for reading. I'm not sure what I'm expecting in the way of replies,just feel better for putting it all down

 

[torch2010]

Boys will be boys. If she thinks this minor altercation is HUGE she has another thing coming. I personally wouldn't have been able to keep my gob shut after her texting my child a message like that. I am very short tempered when it comes to others messing with my child. Is there anyway you can go and speak to her face to face? x

 

[Mama Duck]

Thank you for taking the time to read & reply. Your answer is what I thought - she has overreacted to the whole situation. I see her most days in passing whilst doing the school run. I think I will leave it things as they are. She has hopefully woken up today and realized how silly this is. My ds isn't bothered and tbh nor am I. I was more concerned that she text my ds in the first place,not her place to berate him. She would have got his number from her ds. I just find the whole thing bizarre. If it had been a fight then certainly speak to me but over something as trivial as boys having a bit of fun - really!

The more I think about it (and good Lord I'm trying not to) the more angry I feel. I might possibly explode!

 

[Lianne1986]

I hope she apologies to u and ur son. Hugs x

 

[RachA]

Hopefully this will all of blown over by tomorrow.

I think i would feel the same as you - that it wasn't her place to text your son. Obviously her son could of blown it all out of proportion so that the info she got about what happened was different from the info you received. But even if that was the case i think it's inappropriate for her to of contacted your son rather than yourself.

 

[seoj]

It's so hard to know what her son may have told her happened- part of me says, her mama bear side came out before she realized what she had done... but, with that said, my SD had encountered some issues with class mates and some VERY rude stuff (as girls can be mean- especially teenage girls)- BUT- I would never take it upon myself to talk to the kid first, or text- especially anything that could be perceived wrong. Maybe her "intentions" were OK- but she went about it wrong. I would just maybe let it go - this time- but make it clear, that in the future, if she has issue with any kid to contact the parent first. Especially since she knows you. So she knows how to get a hold of you. My mama bear side would come out if some parents sent my kid a text I thought was rude or mean or threatening. It's just hard when kids can do/say such silly things to eachother, then they are over it just as quick! I think us parents probably take it to heart more. That is our job. LOL.

 

[Mama Duck]

Thank you for all replying!Well,I saw her in passing on the way on the way to school and she came up to me and gave me a huge hug and kissed me on the cheek and walked off. I guess that was her apology and that it's all blown over.

It is a mother's instinct to protect our children. It's hard when us as parents weren't there to witness what happened or what was said so we only get the version they tell us. Boys (all children) will try and point score amongst themselves and try to add spice to the situation to make it more juicy. It was just unfortunate that she chose to take it upon herself rather than to come to me.

 

[Lianne1986]

Im glad things have been resovled hun xx

 

[MorganEvans]

Try arrange a meeting with the mom, it'd do good to talk it out instead of letting some silly grudge ruin the friendship of the boys as well. I don't think he assaulted the president, so there's no need to act for her like he did