My husband's hurtful comments....

[saharablue02]

We had my best friend from college over the other night and grilled dinner, had some wine, etc...

His phone kept beeping so I opened it to turn the stinking thing off and saw a text from one of his old HS friends Kim. And it was about having babies...whether we were going to or not soon like all his other friends (there's like 12 of his HS buddies having kids right now)

So of course I read the others and his replies and he said things a long the lines of "never having kids," "seriously-too selfish right now," "not having anytime soon"

And I got upset but told myself I was not going to start a huge argument over it bc I told him I would not bring babies up for a little while...to give us a chance to be us-that's why I am here LOL Venting to everyone else!

I told him I didn't appreciate the "never" comments but left it at that...ERRRR. I wonder if anytime soon means around June next year?!?

No but seriously; I am trying to be understanding but sometimes I just want to pin him down and

 

[jadeemma79]

lolz =]
just sounds like he needs time, lots of it.
but there was no need to say never =[
xxx

 

[saharablue02]

I know he needs time...but I don't want to give him time I want to TTC sooner than his "not anytime soon." LOL Thanks!!!

 

[Seity]

Honestly, we always say stuff like that because we don't want people to know that we are thinking about kids. I'd ignore it.

 

[CamoQueen]

You know he wouldn't have said that if he was talking to you, so I'm guessing he was just overexaggerating to his friend for effect. I wouldn't read too much into it, but that's just me!

 

[calm]

You know he wouldn't have said that if he was talking to you, so I'm guessing he was just overexaggerating to his friend for effect. I wouldn't read too much into it, but that's just me!

Yes, I totally agree, and men can be such machos in front of their friend "A baby me?" (and then big hearty man laugh) So don't worry xxx

 

[Lois]

I wouldn't think that a couple of texts to an old friend are a particularly reliable source of his innermost feelings so try not to get too hooked up on the words he used. He was probably trying to get the nosey cow to drop the subject as much as anything else.

Also, if it makes you feel any better, my husband went from "We're just not ready" to "Let's go" in the space of 4 months. I think it's probably because I finally left the subject alone and that took the pressure off him...men hey?! The more you tell them to do something the more they resist it!

Lx

 

[Mrs. JJ]

Guys change their minds at the drop of a hat. Don't read to much into it. I'm sure he'll come around by June next year!

 

[Sarahkka]

In your husband's defense, even saying "we're sort of kind of thinking about trying next year" will have people asking you "any news yet?". Maybe he just doesn't want the pressure? Lots of people don't even mention that they're TTC for that very reason.

 

[Pinkgirl]

Dont worry hun and dont let it get you upset.
Speak to OH and tell him how it makes you feel and how you feel.
He might have been saying that as he doesnt want to give anything away
x

 

[PixieKitty]

He probably just doesn't want people to know his business hun

 

[bigbloomerz]

My OH says that to his parents ow and again to put em off the scent lol we are NTNP and will be TTC in September, so he could just b e saying it hun xx

 

[saharablue02]

Thank all of you so much! It really helps to hear your thoughts and advice on my hubs comments! I guess I never really thought about the fact that he was being macho (etc)...it's so nice to get opinions from other people...