my story.... (its a bit long) sorry!

[due3may12]

hey ladies just wanna share my story!
well i found out on sept 1st that i was expecting, wasnt planned but we both couldnt wait to meet him! we were so excited planning minders and wat buggy we'd get and i even have a car bought and i cant drive yet!

But on Dec 4th (almost 18weeks preg) id small (tiny) bit of blood wen i wiped so went straight to a&e and had scan and ill never forget docs words "i'm sorry karen, i can't find the heartbeat.. but i can be wrong but most times i'm not" so i had to come back on the 5th to confirm it! baby had died a week before hand! i hadnt even a pain or anything to indicate something could have happened!

i was sent home for a week to see if i went into labour on my own at homw but nothing! and it was the longest week of my life!
i was booked into hosp again on 12th dec and id to take tabs to make me go into labour! after i took last set of tablets (7 altogether) i felt a pressure down there so midwife came in and my little kevin was born! it was all so quick! it was at 8.50pm.
they took him away and brought him back in a little wicker basket. it was lovely! he was so small. never thought he'd be so small but it was amazing because you could make out every single detail! his little fingers, toes! and his arms and legs were so long so he was gonna be tall like his daddy!

on the 14th we had a naming service and a blessing in the chapel in hosp and we got to bury him after so we buried him with OH's mother so he's beside his granny and with all the other angels!

im sorry this is so so long but just needed to tell story from start to finish to help me!
much love to all you ladies!
xxxxxx
(ps sorry if there are any typos i just kept typing without checking! )

 

[Andypanda6570]

I am so deeply sorry for your loss of Kevin
I lost my Ava at 20 weeks and I gave birth in my home and we buried her on 3/11/2011. It is a hard road we all travel, but I promise things will get better ( I know right now you can't see that, i couldn't either ) It has been over 9 months since I lost Ava and just now am I feeling stronger and getting ready to try in February. I have 3 boys 20,17 and 11 and at 40 getting pregnant was not planned, but I so wanted this baby. Then when I found out she was a girl I was overjoyed I went to do the amnio and before I could even do the amnio they did a sonogram and said she was gone, her heartbeat was not there We did testing but her cells didn't grow, so we don't really know why she died. Are you having testing on Kevin or did they give you a reason why you lost him? You are in my thoughts and prayers. The women here are amazing and will help you through this, nobody understand us , just those who have been through this. People can't even imagine this pain.
I am so sorry, Karen Andrea

 

[Bride2b]

I'm so sorry Karen, even though I have experienced a similar loss I still find it difficult to finds words that can even express the sadness I feel when I know someone else has had to endure such a loss.

I was 19 weeks when I went into labour, my waters broke & went straight to hospital, they didnt scan me as the doctor could see how much water I had lost & prepared me that I would have my baby. He still had a heartbeat when they examined me and it just seemed so unfair they wouldnt do anything to stop the labour progressing. This was on 28th Nov, we only found out a date for the funeral yesterday & its going to be on the 23rd. I've not managed closure yet and its all so raw, so please understand that you have a safe place here as we are all here for this same awful reason. I could not be dealing with things if I didnt have the support of everyone here.

I'm so sorry this happened to you...we are here for you every step of the way xx

 

[OliveBay]

Karen I'm so sorry for your loss.

I know how awful it is to hear those words when they can't find a heartbeat. I went to get checked at 22 weeks as I hadn't felt any movements for a couple of days. I honestly thought everthing was going to be fine and my baby had just moved into a different position. After they were unable to find a heartbeat, they brought in a scanner and I was faced with seeing my poor baby still on the screen. Its is awful how your world can just shatter in those few seconds, and not something any mum ever expects to go through.

I'm pleased you've had the funeral for little Kevin now and can really get on with the grieving process. I hope you are being gentle on yourself and allowing yourself lots of time to feel these awfully sad emotions. I'm am so so sorry you've had to join us here but the ladies here are amazing and provide wonderful proof that we can get through this tragic event

 

[yazoo]

Karen, I am so so sorry for the loss of baby Kevin. I hate that you have to join us here. It breaks my heart when someone new joins. I lost my little boy Jakob 4 months ago at 22 weeks. I went into labour after a very eventful pregnancy with lots of bleeding.

I hope you find as much comfort I have here. Everyone is amazing and understand completely what you are going through. We are all here for you if you need us.

Fly high Kevin. xxxx

ps- I'm from Ireland too.

 

[due3may12]

I am so deeply sorry for your loss of Kevin
I lost my Ava at 20 weeks and I gave birth in my home and we buried her on 3/11/2011. It is a hard road we all travel, but I promise things will get better ( I know right now you can't see that, i couldn't either ) It has been over 9 months since I lost Ava and just now am I feeling stronger and getting ready to try in February. I have 3 boys 20,17 and 11 and at 40 getting pregnant was not planned, but I so wanted this baby. Then when I found out she was a girl I was overjoyed I went to do the amnio and before I could even do the amnio they did a sonogram and said she was gone, her heartbeat was not there We did testing but her cells didn't grow, so we don't really know why she died. Are you having testing on Kevin or did they give you a reason why you lost him? You are in my thoughts and prayers. The women here are amazing and will help you through this, nobody understand us , just those who have been through this. People can't even imagine this pain.
I am so sorry, Karen Andrea

sorry for your loss to pet!
im 23 and with OH 6yrs so we didnt plan him just yet but were thrilled so we will try again in a year i think. ya ive had so much support already just needed to tell story from start to finish! we were told we couldnt do autopsy but that he had stopped growing cz he was so small! znd it wasnt the cord that done it so they're testing some of the placenta and see what they get from that!
much love! xxxx

 

[due3may12]

im so sorry for all yer losses (i dunno how to spell it) lol!

thanks so much for the support and having the patients to read my story!
oh im not going to back to work until jan 4th and have been off dec 5th! so hope job is still there but they understand kinda! they didnt think id have to go through labour and burial so their understanding as much as they can be!

are ye all gonna try again? i cant wait to start again!
my Oh was askin me wat ui asked for every other yr for xmas and i always asked for a baby! we got it this yr even if he's not with us but ill be askin for one next year! i dont want to replace kevin because i know nothing and no1 can ever replace him but would love another baby!

were in ireland are you YAZOO? im in westmeath/roscommon! xxxx

 

[Hellylou]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Fly high little Kevin

 

[SarahJane]

I am so sorry for your loss

Fly high baby Kevin xxxx

 

[dnlfinker]

I am so sorry about your loss of little baby Kevin. I hope you can find strength and support in this hard time

 

[Nikki_d72]

I'm so sorry for your loss of little Kevin. I hate it too when anyone new has to join us, it breaks my heart to know another family is going through this. I hope we can help you a little bit, I'll be here for you whatever you want to say. xxx

 

[DueSeptember]

Sorry for your Lost

 

[yazoo]

were in ireland are you YAZOO? im in westmeath/roscommon! xxxx

I'm in Galway- your not very far away at all x

 

[Vickieh1981]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I wish you did't have to join us here

Fly High Kevin

I am Vickie and Mummy to Isabella who we lost in March 2010

 

[due3may12]

were in ireland are you YAZOO? im in westmeath/roscommon! xxxx

I'm in Galway- your not very far away at all x

ah im from galway originally! miss it!!

 

[winterwonder]

I'm so sorry for your loss.xxx

 

[vickytoria88]

Im so sorry for your loss. It's something you never imagibe happening once you've seen the heart beating and had a scan. Noone should ever have to go through this. R.I.P little one

 

[amotherslove]

i am so so sorry for your loss of kevin..i'm sure he was just gorgeous.

 

[ashley2pink]

 

[jennijunni]

so, so many hugs!! We were due the same day. We lost our baby girl at 15 weeks in November, after losing a baby boy at 17 weeks in June. It is so hard, but it was nice you got to see him, and look at him. Isn't it amazing how perfect they are? Absolutley perfect, just tiny. I am thinking of you, the women here are amazing, and so supportive, and kind, and loving. I just cannot say enough about them. Lots and lots of hugs, and prayers to you Karen.