Need Help With Finding Balance as Working Mother

[Jposey]

I need some practical advice from you ladies about finding balance as a working Mother. My husband and I have very involved families, especially his family who he also is in business with. Our DD is 5 months old today and I went back to work when she was 3 months old. My mother and my mother-in-law watch her while I work full time. It’s been difficult and I can’t help but be jealous of the time they get to spend with her. I am so thankful that she is being watched by people that love and adore her and I am so thankful for the saved money since we don’t have to pay for childcare. But at the same time, our mothers are very strong, motherly women, who I don’t think realize that they are grandma, not mom. I get very possessive of my time with my DD and on nights and weekends, I want that to be my time with my daughter. We had to go to a pizza birthday party last week on a weeknight and I got to really spend about 20 minutes of my time in the morning with my daughter, went to work, went to pizza where everyone else held her and played with her. I held her for another 20 minutes at night to feed, and then it was time for her to go to sleep (she sleeps fully through the night). So I felt like I had less than an hour of quality time with my DD. It seems like our family is always wanting to see her, even on weekends and nights and my husband doesn’t understand when I want to not do things with them. I want that time with my DD and I can’t help but feel like they are encroaching on our time. I have tried talking with my husband until I am blue in the face, but he just doesn’t get it or respect my feelings. I have this overwhelming feeling that I am loosing my bond with my daughter because I work and I of course want to be the #1 woman in her life, I don’t want it to be either of her grandparents. I know this is probably a ridiculous fear, but I am a first time mother and I am just so concerned about our bond since I work. My mother and mother-in-law were both stay at home moms, so they don’t understand. I find myself getting jealous, defensive and out-right witchy… but I just want my baby to myself.

Any advice on how to find balance and to stop feeling like our bond is compromised by me being a working mother.